(Closed) does asking to be invited automatically deserve an invite?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
5106 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

Nope. I am so beyond tired of people inviting themselves.

Since when is it okay to ask for an invite to anything???

Post # 4
1986 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

No, if you invited anyone that asked and non-jokingly/jokingly said that they better be invited you would go way over and not be happy with your guest list. 

Just say that due to budget your guest list is restricted/ reception constraints/ intimate wedding.  Whatever applies, or you don’t have to explain yourself if you do not feel it is necessary. 

Post # 5
762 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I say no, simply because she’s not a “must have” guest since you are doing a DIY wedding…if we invited ever person who asked us if they could come we would have well over 250 guests and we are having a DIY wedding aswell. Personally I think asking for an invite is really rude but that’s just me. It’s totally up to you but I know myself that I would say no.

Hope that helps! 🙂

Post # 7
780 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I know this situation oh too well.  Fiance and I are having 75 guests.  That means I can only invite 1/2 of those ppl bc Fiance has to have room to invite the other 1/2.  Needless to say, I have to turn alot of people down when they “invite themselves”. 

Post # 8
14494 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Nope, I really can’t believe she even asked.  How rude.  That is the worst when people invite themselves.

Post # 9
9 posts
  • Wedding: July 2011

No. You definitely don’t need to send an invite.

I would probably end up inviting her though.

Post # 11
690 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I would just not say anything and just not invite them. If your bridesmaid or the mother bring it up again, just say that the guestlist is already set with close friends and family.

Post # 12
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Its a very funny situation but I have to agree with the majority and say I wouldnt invite her either… in my opinion its rather annoying how people hear the word wedding and automatically assume they should be invited and then there are those that have the nerve to ask to be invited. I feel like if you have to ask to be invited then obviously you shouldnt be invited… I could just be a meanie LOL

Post # 13
83 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

No.  Very simple.  A PC reply would be, “our guest list is small and limited.  I am so happy your daughter will be at my side representing your family well.”  So ppl just like to have somewhere to go, something to do to serve as an outing or a date.  Tell her to take her hubby on a date and have a toast in your honor!

Post # 14
5118 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

You didn’t leave her off out of spite, so don’t even feel bad for this. Rude people (or even nice people who ‘slip up’ every once in a while) do not deserve something just because they ask/invite themselves. The standard ‘sorry…budget/space/small guest list/etc’ answer should suffice, and like another PP said, just say how thrilled you are to have her daughter in the service. Do not feel obligated to invite her (or seat her next to her requested friends, lol…wth?).

Post # 15
3166 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

nope, you’re definitely not obligated!

Post # 16
979 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I wouldn’t invite her.  I hate being ambushed by these people who invite themselves.  I’v been telling people my guest list is maxed out and sorry for your luck.  I didn’t invite a lot of family because they have not invited me to anything so I don’t feel bad at all.

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