Does divorced parents get introduced together at reception?

posted 9 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I have divorced parents and for my brother’s wedding, my dad walked in with my Step-mom and then my mom walked in with her Fiance.  So I think it is whatever you and your Fiance think would be best for them and you.  I am only having the bridal party introduced by the DJ.  The reason being is that I plan to let the parents and grandparents go inside after they finish with pictures and then go outside to take fun shots with the bridal party.

Post # 4
Member
595 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I never been at a wedding where they introduced the parents at the reception as they walk in.. my parents are divorced and my dad is remarried.. I am really glad that hasn’t been a tradition around here! lol. . . something else to worry about.

My mom always says she is fine with it but I know it sucks for her… Big time!

My opinion. . don’t ask them to walk in together. Do them seperate. Are they remarried?

Post # 6
Member
595 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

In this case I would ask them and see what they say… It would be nice if they did walk in together since they are both not remarried.. maybe give them the option that they walk in together or alone.
I am hoping my parents will stand up together to thank everyone at the reception. They are the ones that had me … I am their daughter whether they like eachother or not.

I think my parents do a good job of trying to get along though. . so this will be hard if they are less willing.

Post # 8
Member
7052 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

I haven’t been to a wedding where the parents were introduced at the reception before either.

I would not have it done personally.  I hate it for your FI’s mom.  I understand how she feels.  But hopefully she can work through all this.  I did.  It wasn’t easy, but it worked.

You never really forget it, but it dulls over time.  But at a wedding, I’m sure it will stir up emotions and bring alot of pain back for her.  I say seat them as far away from each other as possible and make sure your Fiance is VERY supportive of his mom on your wedding day. 

I under no circumstances would walk in and be announced with my former husband.  It would not happen.  I would never personally agree to it.  I am good with sitting in same church with him, at events for my child, but I am not with him anymore and wouldn’t want to be introduced with him.  Please do not do something that would be hurtful to his mother.

Post # 9
Member
1260 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I sorta agree with Bellenga here – if there are a lot of hurt feelings on her part, I would introduce them separately. Perhaps you could have each parent walk in with a sibling, (if he has siblings?) My FI’s parents are divorced, but they are still amicable. We aren’t introducing our parents though, so I don’t have this issue.

Post # 10
Member
1066 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I dont think I would ask her, considering how they divorced, it will be so hard for her… I don’t think I could walk in with my ex if he had cheated on me!!  I think they should walk in separately, with either a grandparent, or sibling, etc.  Thats what a lot of people do now, and it wouldn’t look odd or anything, it’s understandable.

Post # 11
Member
1032 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Why don’t you just skip it? There was a lot of things I didn’t do because of the divorce issue or other family stuff.

The parents by no means HAVE to be introduced.

We also skipped the receiving line because of blad blood between my mom and dad.

There are lots of ways to get around the divorce stuff. I would suggest not announcing the parents. Explain to his parents and they will understand.

Post # 12
Member
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

I think they should be introduced separately…with a guest or not.  It’s better to keep the peace and if they don’t consider themselves a couple anymore, they don’t need to be announced together.  they are still announced as father of the groom or mother of the groom!

Post # 12
Member
3 posts
Wannabee

My bf”s son is getting married in about 6 weeks & his son asked him if he would mind being introduced at his bridal reception with his mother ( my bf’s ex-wife). I feel like first of all if you have to ask, then you should already know the answer to begin with.  With that being said; although my future step son ( my bf’s son & soon to be groom) asked his dad’s permission, his dad ( my bf) really feels uncomfortable with this too although he does not even want to tell his son that ( honestly neither of us are even looking forward to this day for many reasons, especially things of these matters) & with being announced in with his ex-wife. ( Um, hello!!!! There is reasons they divorced & chose not to share all the details with their kids, isn’t that enough? ) I have been a part of my soon to be future step son’s life (my bf’s son) since he was in grade school  & his mother (my bf’s ex-wife) has made the whole family miserable for over a decade, and I mean miserable too.. Do you think anyone has forgotten that? We certainly have not!  Even though through the whole wedding planning stages & bridal shower process & wedding details they’ve seemed to have forgotten all that! Quite actually, I’ve been in my bf’s son’s life longer than his soon to be’s wife,  (& I mean A LOT LONGER too)  & probably in reality more than his real mother even has. The Groom’s mother made the whole family’s life miserable for a VERY LONG TIME!  I know the day is about the bride & groom only;  but why would either of them want their parents uncomfortable that day? (especially since they’ve put up money for things too, not just the Bride’s family?) I think it’s very selfish of the bride & groom honestly. Absolutely I agree that the focus should be on the bride & groom on their day, but the parents should NOT BE announced, have glasses or agenda’s, mass printed materials,  programs, shirts, favors or anything of such matter with mother or father of the  bride/ groom or etc. through the wedding or the bridal shower process at all wirhout their current divorced parent’s partner’s name there too. Either do it right or don’t do it at all because it’s in very poor taste, & I’m sure if the bride & groom are not pressured by such ridiculous behaviors or feelings inside that day from others, than their wedding day will be much more rewarding as well! You should not zero out any parent, step parent or parent’s  boyfriend’s or girlfriend’s or anyone you’ve loved as family, regardless whether or not they are family or not, in any way PERIOD, especially if they’ve been a part of your life most of your life & if you don’t  really like them, than just don’t invite them then. Trust me, it will be easier on everyone, but don’t be surprised if one of your real parents don’t show up because of the way you’ve handled things.  Why does it even matter if they are announced in together? It’s not in poor taste to announce in Mother of the groom escorted by groom’s Uncle  Bob Miller so & so, or Father of the groom escorted with partner Jill Smith, etc. Are you announcing grandparents too? Where do you draw the line? (Besides the fact that your only taking precious time away from your overly priced reception that day.)

If your going to do it, just do it with a little bit of class or only announce the Bride & Groom! I promise people won’t go home from your wedding day saying ” they forgot to announce the bride or groom’s real parents into their reception!” Seriously, BE FOR REAL! 

Being  my bf’s gf and darn near step mother to the soon to be groom ( & several other of his children too for quite some time) it certainly has been a  very thankless job & this only proves it more & more! 

You don’t feel bad not inviting children to your wedding reception correct, so why do you have to announce two people in together that can not even stand looking at each other &  are divorced because they no longer wish to even be around each other? Think about it…

I only wish the bride & groom the best  slways, but if things never did work out in their future, would they like those same pressures especially if they went through “War of the Roses in their bloody divorce?”

 

Post # 13
Member
1201 posts
Bumble bee

I’ve actually never even heard of this tradition. Could you skip it altogether?

Post # 14
Member
2615 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - St Peter's Church, East Maitland, and Bella Vista, Newcastle

This thread is seven years old?

Post # 15
Member
3 posts
Wannabee

liaeona :  Yes, it could be but its up to the bride & groom & i don’t think they will.

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