(Closed) Does he clean?

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Does he share the cleaning?



    Only when I ask

  • Post # 3
    4413 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Haha DH tidies up his own crap, but he doesn’t actually CLEAN unless I ask. It’s okay though; he just sees it as me being master of the house, so he wouldn’t suddenly take it upon himself to clean the sink or something for fear of messing up my master plan. But he cheerfully completes any task when asked!

    Post # 4
    1828 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    I was actually just getting on FI’s case today about him having 2.5 days off in a row and doing nothing but putting up the curtains! He’s like “yeah..I’m sorry, I’m bad.”

    I have to tell him what and when things need to be done, but he always does it once I ask. I’ve learned from being together for so long that that’s just how it’s going to be, at least for now, and I’m okay with that most of the time.

    Post # 5
    549 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    Only when I ask. Sigh.

    Post # 6
    3569 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    We are long distance, but have spent a lot of time together. He is more a clean freak then me, I don’t mind clutter.

    In the end he has to realize I not going to meet his standards, I step up and make more an effort to clean counters and put things away as I know it’s going to annoy him. 


    Post # 7
    1924 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I do most of the cleaning, but I have a lot more time than he does.  He said he just doesn’t notice or think about cleaning.  But if I ask him to do something, he does.

    Post # 8
    679 posts
    Busy bee

    I voted yes, because my Fiance is the neat freak and I am the one who doesn’t notice the mess and/or messiness doesn’t bother me enough to prompt me to clean.

    This is a reverse situation but it is what has worked for us. Fiance let me know that he didn’t mind cleaning but that he was becoming resentful for bearing most of the burden AND he felt like it took time away from relaxing together after work and on the weekends. So he asked if we could institute a short time period each night where we both do a bit of cleaning. We take 20 minutes after dinner every night, each pick a chore, and complete it. It’s hardly any time at all, it keeps the place in a consistent state of cleanliness, and he’s right, we do have more time to relax together.

    Could you perhaps institute something like that? If your SO sees how little time it really is and how much it helps the relationship, maybe he will be more willing…

    Post # 9
    9952 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    We clean together, the same way we do almost everything else.  It’s never been an issue with us.  We haven’t even talked about it very much.  We each know what needs to be done and we do it.  No big deal.  For example, whoever cooks the other cleans. If he’s mowing the lawn I’m inside doing laundry.  We agree we like things in our environment to stay beautiful, clean and neat – house and yard – and we both do our share to make it happen.  I’m lucky, I know!

    Post # 10
    525 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    It depends.  Sometimes he takes the initiative, but generally I have to ask him to clean stuff up.  I mainly make him take care of the kitchen and I clean everywhere else (which is quite the job, since he just leaves his crap EVERYWHERE as he takes it out of his pockets/disrobes no matter where he is at the time).


    His idea of “clean” and mine are a bit different though.  I’ll usually go through areas that he has “cleaned” and tidy up a bit more.

    Post # 11
    254 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    We’re also reversed. Fiance will clean of his own accord, whereas sometimes I need a kick in the butt. That said, sometimes he slacks a bit on his actual cleaning abilities. Like, he’ll have a fit because of a messy kitchen, do the dishes and clean the stove but not touch the counters. So we tend to even each other out because I’ll pick up where he leaves off.

    Post # 12
    8036 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2013

    @memo:  He cleans more than I do. I’m the bad one that has to be nagged a bit 😛

    He’s a keeper!

    Post # 13
    1036 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    before i moved in with him, he was good at picking up before i came over. he would do laundry but never folded so whenever i went over there i folded what he would lay on the couch. as soon as i moved in i was doing the cleaning. now that we are married and i am not working its like my duty to clean. i dont have a problem with it, just wish he woul pick up after himself.

    Post # 14
    2116 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    Thank god he cleans…


    He does the bathroom, empties the dishwasher, helps with laundry, helps clean up dishes after dinner, does all the dusting, and takes out all the trash.


    I deep clean the kitchen, vacuum the whole place, do all the cooking, change the litterbox, help with laundry, and also empty the dishwasher.

    We are very very even.

    Post # 15
    2831 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    Only when I ask but still does not do a good job so I will usually have to go over it again myself.Yell

    Post # 16
    898 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    I voted yes, but that’s kind of halfway a lie.  Meaning, neither one of us cleans that much.  I mean, our house is pretty picked up and clutter-free (and I do most of that picking up), but neither one of us does a whole lot of deep cleaning.

    We both pretty much only really clean when we have people coming over, and then we split it.

    I’m a teacher and so I’m not even working yet (I go back next week), and I *still* don’t clean.  Instead, I spend all day doing wedding projects, playing on the Bee, running errands.  Still not cleaning.

    He does most of the laundry.  I wipe up the kitchen after either of us makes anything.  I pick up all the clothes that we both throw on the floor and I tidy.  But that’s pretttty much it.

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