(Closed) Does He give you MONEY $$ ? DO you ask ?

posted 9 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Does He give you MONEY $$ ? DO you ask ?
    NO, no : (163 votes)
    37 %
    Yes, yes : (107 votes)
    25 %
    NO, yes : (4 votes)
    1 %
    Yes, no : (119 votes)
    27 %
    other explain below : (43 votes)
    10 %
  • Post # 92
    Member
    80 posts
    Worker bee

    I don’t know what it is, but when I was a kid or a teen asking my mum for money was the mega no no.  NEVER.  Not unless you wanted your arse handed to you.

    Now I would rather die than ask anyone for any money ever.  Even if it’s irrational and dumb, it’s ingrained into me.  Maybe it’s a pride thing…

    I’m totally up financial shit creek too.  I managed to go ask my bank to bail me out, now I have a massive loan.

    So no, I don’t ask for money.  I’d rather die.  Which is dumb.  But I’m still not going to ask anyone for money ever.  Nope.

     

    Post # 93
    Member
    241 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2011

    Yes, and yes. For example, I’m notorious for not carrying any cash, so if I’m going out to dinner and need cash for the valet or my meal, I’ll ask him for cash so I don’t have to stop by an ATM. Next time we go out, I’ll put gas in his car or I’ll pay for our next dinner out. We have both separate accounts and a joint account and we give money to each other back and forth as needed. In the end, it all evens out!

    Post # 94
    Member
    1346 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    Our pays go into one account so it’s kinda joint money although his pay isalmost double mine when he works a full week :S

    Post # 95
    Member
    384 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    He has his money, I have mine.  So there is no reason to ask.

    Post # 96
    Member
    1613 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    I never ask, and he always trys to give me money, but he knows that I really don’t have any and that I never spend anything…he’s the spender and I’m the saver/deal finder…I make great money working in the ER, but he does way better then me…he’s also told me that he’s never been with a girl who didn’t ask for money or borrow it and never pay him back… :/

    Post # 97
    Member
    1370 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    We have a huge pay discrepancy so sometimes he has to help me out. I never ask but he offers, especially since I lost my job. It’s usually paying for things like a plane ticket when he wants me to fly out. Never cash just for shopping or whatever.

    Post # 98
    Member
    20 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    Yes he does, and no I don’t ever ask. He had set up an account for me and deposits money in there every month and I use it whenever I need/want to. I do have a very well paying job, but due to family finances most of my income goes to help my family (which I am okay with, I only wish I made more). My fiancé understands it, and doesn’t want me to go without so he views it as me taking care of my family and he’s taking care of me. It works. 

    Post # 99
    Member
    1114 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    I answered yes and yes. Fiance has given me money a few times for random things without me asking, and he’s also given me money when I ask. Usually when he gives me money when I ask it’s because I forgot to hit up an ATM and need cash for something, and I generally pay him back.

    Post # 100
    Member
    1548 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Yes he gives me money and yes I ask. I’m not talking about large sums of money or me asking permission to use “our”money, I am more referring to cash. I very rarely have cash on my, so if I’m running out to pick up dinner dinner, or getting coffee, I will definitely ask for money – he never complains. 

    Post # 101
    Member
    486 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I don’t have a job right now and we share an account. If something is coming up that I need or want, he knows and then just suprises me with it. I don’t have to ask or get handed money. It works for us, for now. Plus, to him it’s like he spoils me so he loves it. 

    Post # 102
    Member
    3089 posts
    Sugar bee

    No, I cant imagine asking him for money unless it’s an absolute emergency or an extreme circumstance.  Not comfortable with it.  I  mean, he will put gas in the car, we will take each other out etc.  But actual money has never exchanged hands.  When we get married, I think we will just come up on what percentage each will pay and just do what we need to do.  I am also all for a joint account (even though I still want something separate for personals).

    Post # 103
    Member
    2142 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    We both ask for and give each other money, because sometimes one of us has cash and the other doesn’t. I just assume it about equals out over time, but it doesn’t matter.

    Post # 104
    Member
    47 posts
    Newbee

    Fiance is footing the bills right now. I had two options 1- Finish school at a cheap state college and live with my family, 2- Go to a private college and live with him. He decided on option 2 because he didn’t want to be 4/5 hours apart. As of now, he pays for almost everything and helps me pay for the private college tuition, as it’s much more expensive than I could afford on my own. He just expects stellar grades in return 🙂

    ETA: I’m going to college for engineering, and applying to medical school. Either way, when I’m done, I’ll be able to pay it back/contribute quite a bit, which also helps to alleviate the guilt.

    Post # 105
    Member
    195 posts
    Blushing bee

    No, I make my own money, I pay my own tutition, bills, etc.. and would feel far too guilty to ever ask for money.  I never want to rely on my SO for any financial reason what so ever.  The ONLY time he has given me money is when the weather was horrible and he wanted me to take a cab to work instead of walk.  I wanted to walk and he left him his visa demanding I take a cab ratehr than brave the horrible Canadian winter. (which I deep down though that was very caring of him!), 

    Post # 106
    Member
    6354 posts
    Bee Keeper

     Um, no.

    Even though we aren’t marred yet, we kind of treat any money we have as “our” money and we mutally agree on how we spend it. I mean, not like we ask each other about every purchase, just overall. Both of us contribute to the “pot.” I already see him as a part of me, not seperate.

     

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