(Closed) Does he have an ex you can’t stand?

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
2249 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2018

oohh that is tough. Just keep in mind he proposed to you! Not her

((hugs))

Post # 4
Member
10218 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

Oh honey, definitely don’t worry about it. I am friends with most of my exes.  Just because it didn’t work out romantically doesn’t mean they don’t care for each other’s well being.  Have you told him that you are concerned about her, etc.  Sometimes if you tell him what’s going on he’ll understand.  but he may just be going to say he’s getting married and is so incredibly excited about his new life with his fiance etc. and wants to catch up with her life. I hope that makes sense?

Post # 5
Member
1514 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

My husband’s ex-wife.  She drives us both INSANE though, so atleast I can really complain about her to him.  I’m sure it makes it tons harder when he actually still likes the other person.  Have you talked to him about how you feel about him spending time with her?

Post # 6
Member
465 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Oh man. YES. They broke up shortly before we began dating. She continues to call and message him. Fiance is too nice to ignore her. Simply put, she’s crazy! She STILL tries to get them back together, even though we’ve been engaged for a year! She’s totally nuts, and I can hardly keep from driving over to her house (only 15 minutes away UGH) and giving her a piece of my mind…

 

Good luck. At least she’s only in town for a little while, right? Maybe mention it to Fiance casually, or be up front and let him know that you are NOT comfortable with them talking or seeing each other while she’s around. 

Post # 7
Member
381 posts
Helper bee

Eh.  Mr. Tacos is still friendly with his ex, who was his first serious relationship.  I was Boyfriend or Best Friend with my ex but we started drifting and I let it.  However, even though Mr. Tacos loves me to pieces, I worry about his ex… and should she suddenly decide she “misses him”.  Gah.  I know I treat him a hell of a lot better, but she has an education and they could banter about their professions. :/  I wouldn’t worry about it.  As much as I even love my ex to pieces, I would never cross that line either.

Post # 8
Member
1336 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

Yes, and thankfully that friendship is over.  I never wanted to be that girl; the jealous girl that demands that her boyfriend cuts off all ties with his exes, but it came down to that.  When my SO and I first began dating we were long distance and they would go out all the time!  I understand every once in a while drinks, lunch, whatever, but no, they would have dinner, go to movies, it sounded more like dates.  He told me it was harmless, but she sounded so needy that I was very uncomfortable with it.  What made me even more ticked off was that he brought it up to her and was totally offended and had the great idea that we should all hang out, to which I said no thank you, I have friends of my own.  So anyway there were so many other things, but finally he realized how their relationship was not normal once he kind of polled other friends of ours and noticed how much it really bothered me. 

Post # 9
Member
144 posts
Blushing bee

I am generally laid back but my Fiance has one ex who I cannot stand.  They lived together and he bought our current dog for her because she missed a dog she had with a previous bf.  Well she was a gross coke head(literally) and when my Fiance found out about it he kicked her out and they broke up.  Flash forward a couple of years and him and I are engaged now and are at the vet with our dog and two cats.  I was in the car with the menagerie of animals we have waiting for him to pay the bill, but it was taking forever. So I walked in and he had this kinda weird look on his face.  So I asked what was wrong and he said he just saw Susie(his ex) and I was like “oh that’s cool” kinda looking around to see her.  And he goes “I told her we’d wait for her vet appointment to be over so she can see the dog”.  I was maaad.  We sat around for like half an hour and when our dog went up to her she growled at her which kind of made me feel better in a kind of vindictive way. 

The other bee’s are right, he picked you so no worries.  But I can totally see how that would drive you crazy.  I’d talk to him about it and try not to make something out of nothing if he says it’s harmless unless you have reason to believe otherwise.

Post # 10
Member
3098 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

Well, I haven’t actually met her… yet. But I’ll have to soon, and I’m a little weirded out by it.

He dated her for four years, she was his first real gf. They remained friends for a few years, but then she lied to him, so he pretty much just stopped talking to her. Well, she and I have a mutual friend (we had no clue about this!) and we’re both really good friends with her, but his ex is like, one of her childhood besties. Anyway, mutual friend just got engaged (YAY!) and I KNOW that I will have to meet this girl at their engagement party, showers, bachelorette party, wedding, etc.

I guess it’s not really an issue, except that this chick and I are NOTHING alike. She’s a spoiled, stuck up rich girl (even mutual friend says this, not just my husband) and very snobby. I’m so not like that (neither is mutual friend or husband, so I don’t get it). We’re both friends with a lot of the same people on FB, and she’ll comment on a photo of theirs or something after I do, like, a lot, so I always get notifications in her name. I think that’s on purpose. Anyway, I don’t want to jump to conclusions, but I don’t think our meeting is going to go real well.

Post # 11
Member
286 posts
Helper bee

Yep…I can’t stand both of his ex’s and I have only meet one…I just don’t care for how one acts, we all went to college together and she did my Fiance pretty bad….and the second one…..I just don’t even want him talking about her….

Post # 12
Member
447 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

There are two. One, I’ve never met, but knowing their history, it would just be incredibly awkward if we did.

The other, I don’t know why I don’t like her. She’s never done anything to me, but I suppose it’s because she was the girl before me. She put him through a lot of emotional crap and flip-flopped on her feelings a lot, and they were dating on and off for a year. Also, she finally told him she loved him right after he and I started seeing each other. It was irritating to say the least. It used to drive me insane when she would text him, still does at times, only because we don’t know if she’s really over him or not.

Post # 13
Member
4466 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Yes!  I’ve never met her, but from what I’ve dealt with so far, she seems like a psycho!

Fiance dated her through most of high school and some of college.  They broke up when she cheated on him.  Fiance and I started dating about a year later.  On our first date (!) we saw a couple of their mutual friends.  Apparently, said “friends” told her that Fiance is now dating a sl*t with huge t*ts.  Classy.  She started calling and stalking Fiance, trying to get back together.

When we got engaged, she flipped.  Please note by this point we lived 100s of miles from her, and they had been broken up for six years.  She contacted Fiance and got all upset as to how he could have gotten engaged.  Um, what? 

It also weirds me out that she lives in the same town as FIs parents, and they see her all the time.

Post # 14
Member
2513 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

Yes. His ex-wife.

She tried to cause serious problems for us when we first started seeing each other. She is a complete psycho, not to mention a cheating whore, which is why she is the ex-wife.

He cut off all contact with her shortly after we started dating & she totally freaked.

Luckily, that was 2 1/2 years ago, and apparently she got the message & decided to move on. She still lives in the same town though, which I hate, but I know he would NEVER go there again & there is no contact, so that’s good at least.

But still, UGH.

Post # 15
Member
206 posts
Helper bee

LAYLABELLE– Same thing happens to me on FB with his ex…(we have a ton of mutual friends) the last “serious” one from like 6 yrs ago but truthfully I cant stand the chic.  We’ve never officially met and she’s rarely tried to contact him (not at all within in the last few yrs) but she still annoys me to death.  When he started dating me she would tell all of his friends gf’s that I was trying to set up their bf’s with my friends (blatant lie and seriously how the hell would she have known that anyway if i was actually doing something like that) and she would talk about me to people constantly who were our mutual friends who of course would tell me.  She really is just an all around sucky person.  Cheated on him, they lived together a brief time and she’d move out constantly, wouldnt work, just a total waste of space.

She’s tried to stay friends with alot of his old friends so she comments on their FB pages or will randomly call them… most of his friends are now my good friends who all thought she was a major bitch so at least they wont invite her anywhere we are bc we’ve all become good friends.

I’ve been with the boy for so long now though and he has never once tried to contact her or even acknowledge her so im not concerned at all anymore… though the sight of her name still annoys me in a childish way 😉

Post # 16
Member
519 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

HAHA…yes. Her craziness….oh Gosh, I hate her. At least Hubs does too! She kept the ring and all…I have posted a couple of threads about her. That’s how nuts she makes me. Anyway. She claims this was b/c of her kids, but their new puppy’s name is Emma (my husband’s parents have an OLD dog named Emma,) to top that off, since she broke up with hubs and kept his ring (for whatever reason) she has dated a guy named Dan and is now (supposedly) marrying a man named Dave. Hubs’ dad’s name is Dan and his uncle is Dave. Seriously? I think that just seems too much to be coincidence.

He also has another ex who named her kid Spencer…after all of the calls and crazy things she said to hubs after they broke up. (when they dated, his last name was Spencer. Since then he has changed his last name).

I hear ya on the crazy exes.

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