Post # 1
my finace had gotten me this beautiful moonstone mermaid ring as an engaement ring and i absolutely love it. and it only cost around 60 to 70$
we are both really young and in college. so it hard to spend millions on a ring. his side oft the family is freaking out telling me it doesnt count because it doesnt cost millions. does it really matter? i thought that if u like it and the love is real the cost doesnt matter but am i wrong?
Post # 2
Dani Nichole Shrout : You are right, they are wrong. An engagement ring is a symbol of a promise or commitment and can take whatever form makes both people happy. Are they concerned about durability or are they just being snobby?
Congratulations on your engagement!
If that is your actual name you should consider changing to something so easily traced back to your real life.
Post # 3
Dani Nichole Shrout : No, it doesn’t matter. Also, why does his family know how much your ring cost? But even more, why do you care what they think? To reiterate: No, it doesn’t matter.
Post # 4
Congrats on your ring! If that is what you love, that is all that matters!
Post # 5
I think that if you love it, that’s all that should matter. It “counts” even if there is no ring at all.
My only concern with a really inexpensive ring would be whether it’s made out of materials that will hold up to wear and not irritate my skin. If I love the ring, I would want to make sure it’s going to last, which is certainly possible without spending a ton of money.
Post # 6
Are you marrying them? Are they chipping in for another ring? No? Then they don’t matter. If the size of your ring and the cost of it was that important, celebrities wouldn’t contribute to deforestation with their abundant divorce papers.
Post # 7
Doesn’t matter if you love it. I think sometimes the older generation seems to think that by spending a lot on a ring it shows the suitor is “serious”.
FWIW, there may be more than just the cost of the ring making them not take this seriously. I saw from your previous thread this just kind of came up because your Fiance is enlisting and you guys wanted to be married before he goes. Am I wrong to assume you guys are fairly young (okay, not assuming cause I can totally FB stalk you since you used your RN for your account and see you guys are young; privacy settings, girlfriend!)? I think that could be a big piece of the puzzle as to why they aren’t taking this seriously.
So yeah, its not just he got you a cheap ring its the sum of everything. If I was 18 (i’m guessing here) and my boyfriend gave me a $60 ring and said we were engaged my dad would have laughed me out of the house.
Post # 8
Lawd, I hate people sometimes.
No, cost doesn’t matter. The love and commitment that goes into buying someone a ring is all that matters.
Sorry, I just get really irritated by people who think this way.
Post # 9
They’re jerks and absolutely wrong. You don’t need a ring to be engaged. You don’t need an expensive ring to be engaged. You don’t need a diamond ring to be engaged. All you need is a partner who loves you and who you want to spend the rest of your life with.
Congrats on your engagement by the way! You should totally share a picture of your ring here. We’ll drool over it with you.
Post # 10
slomotion : i am only 20 and he is 19. i do think that alot of it is that we are young but befor the airforce ordeal and us being engaged they told me that they would support us. then it all happened at one time and they seem to not be happy or as supportive as they said they would be. and when we got enegaged the first thing they blurted out was ‘are u pregnant”. so that was something that bothered me as well. i feel as its a huge burden on them and i dont want them to hate me. they are always choosing what to lecture us about, either we are to young, the ring didnt cost enough and so on. im just trying to make sure im even doing this right
Post # 11
bumblebug : lol id totaly love to, thank you
Post # 12
Dani Nichole Shrout : I would imagine this is less about the actual cost of the ring and more that they feel you two aren’t ready to be married. Are you both supporting yourselves at the minute? What is your plan for marriage?
Post # 13
Dani Nichole Shrout : There is no right or wrong way to be in love and live your life. It sounds like you’re in a difficult sitatuion where nothing you do will be right to them. Which is sad, but sometimes thats just the way it is. It seems like when they said they would support you they imagined it wouldn’t ever happen or if it did it would be way down the line. Now that you guys are serious, they are freaked.
I see nothing wrong with a $60 ring. I also see nothing wrong with if you want to get engaged at 19/20. My advice as someone who is older who was in a long term relationship at your age is to be engaged but have a long engagement. You and your SO are going to grow sooooooo much over the next 5 years, like seriously, you won’ even recognize 19 year old you once you hit your mid twenties. So, relax, enjoy your relationship, enjoy your SO. Accomplish stuff! You’ll still be together either way. And maybe if his family sees you guys growing and living life and not rushing into being married they might come around and feel a lot more positive when it is time for the actual marriage part.
I say this as an almost 29 year old. So, not too much older than you. I just know had I done all the things I wanted to do at 19 right then I would have had a LOT of regrets as the years went by. I’m glad I slowed down and took my time before making any huge decisions.
Post # 15
It doesn’t matter as long as you aren’t rushing into anything. I imagine they are mostly concerned because you are so young. A PP’s suggestion of a long engagement is a great idea 🙂 Also, just as a friendly tip- you should change your username so that its not your real name.