(Closed) Does marriage really change everything??

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
677 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

After the marriage, our relationship is even better and more romantic. We get a huge kick out of calling each other husband and wife. I love the way it feels to be married, to have that uniting us, I dont know how it is for other people, but for us its been wonderful and has improved our relationship.

Post # 4
Member
955 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I can’t relate when people say it changed things so much. We were together 7 years, lived together for 6 of those years and had combined finances for 4 years. So for us nothing really chaned at all. I have asked  Darling Husband and he laughs when I ask him so for him definitly nothing has changed. For me I guess I have a little bit more sense of security, if that makes sense. But thats all.

Post # 6
Member
3126 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

@pinkb: agreed. I think it is different for people who don’t live together before marriage, don’t have sex before marriage, or don’t combine finances before marriage but do afterwards.

After 8 years together, there is really no difference between pre-marriage and post=marriage for us.

Post # 7
Member
463 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

I really hope not.

I think my situation is a little bit more traditional.  We won’t live together before marriage, but we did combine our finances after we got engaged so Fiance could get used to being head of the household. 

I’m interested in hearing some Bees from traditional relationships.  I think the living together is a change, but how we feel towards each other and treat each other shouldn’t change.  Maybe get sweeter like AnnaBelle said since we’ll love calling each other hubby and wifey. 

Post # 8
Member
546 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

No, not really. I aked my husband if he feels anything different now that we’re married. He replied that he enjoys getting some whenever he wants as his favorite perk of marriage.

LOL!!!!!!!

Anyways, we lived togethere for 4 years before getting hitched so I knew exactly how he brushes his teeth, dosnt put the dishes in the dishwasher etc.. No surprises. 

Just the title chage is fun, and I fet a kick out of him wearing his ring.

Post # 9
Member
955 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@Luckygir15: I do get a kick out of him wearing his ring too! He never wears jewlery so I love to see that ring on his finger everyday πŸ™‚

Post # 10
Member
3368 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

We’ve both commented on how different it feels to actually be married.  There’s the wonderful “honeymoon phase” and I don’t mean the actual honeymoon.  For several weeks, we were both on cloud nine.  And now that life is back to normal, we’re still more aware of our status, so to speak.  I think that facing the nerves of the day and saying those vows aloud does impact your daily lives.  We lived together for several years, had a home and child, so I didn’t think it would change anything.

Darling Husband just said he feels different, too, and he feels closer.  That with the whole run-up to the wedding, all the planning and stress, getting to the vows is something that we accomplished together… there’s a finality to it all (not sure exatly what he means by that finality, but he’s done talking and Star Trek is on… lol).

So, I’d say that if the relationship is strong, it will feel stronger after the vows. 

Post # 11
Member
2161 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Not a lot has changed.  We still love each other and still have our days where we feel annoyed by each other.  πŸ˜‰   I do find that others treat us a bit differently.

In a sense, we feel more secure.  We have set down and have come up with a great financial plan for ourselves.   It feels great to know he is my husband.

 

Post # 12
Member
1523 posts
Bumble bee

The biggest change for us will just be able to call each other husband and wife. I’m looking forward to changing my name too πŸ™‚ And him wearing a ring. I think it’ll just make me feel more secure in our relationship. It’s a little different. We live together now, and aren’t going to be combining all of our finances, so that won’t change. It’ll just feel more official and feel like our relationship is more recognized.

Post # 13
Member
7293 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’ve heard that saying, and I can see how for some people it does change everything and for others maybe not so much.

I think the character of the people and their intentions going into a marriage is huge!

 

Post # 14
Member
1576 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

As someone who has been married twice before, I would say DEFINITELY. Both times, it didn’t change at first and the change was sutle. There is much more in terms of expectations. It is hard to describe really.

Post # 15
Member
5985 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

not really. everything is just as wonderful as it was before πŸ™‚

*we lived together before we got married so not much changed. it is so nice to be able to say husband instead of SO, Boyfriend or Best Friend, or Fiance…its sounds so temporary! 

Post # 16
Member
215 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

For couples who have yet to live together, it can be the best year of your marriage or the worst.  Think about all the habbits you have no clue about, like what brand of toothpaste he uses…or the fact that you can’t stand that he never puts the dishes in the washer, or forgets to put clothes in the dryer.  These are the LITTLE things, that can cause big or little fights.  Dating outside of living together is SO different.  You’re always putting your best self at each date most of the time.  Living together, you see the good with the bad.  Sometimes couples FORGET that it took effort and time to start a great relationship, and you have to do the same in a marriage.  That’s why you have date night once a week…and pre-marital classes are great.  They talk about topics that you maybe have yet to bring up to your FH.  That helps to come up with a game plan, to prevent some arguments from kicking you in the butt. 

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