Post # 1
Member
66 posts
Worker bee
Hi Bees,
I don’t want to bore anyone with details but my dad and I have never gotten along. The one person who I love and respect most in the world is my mum and I would love for her to walk me down the aisle.
My friend thinks it will look weird if my dad is at the wedding but my mum walks me down the aisle. What do you guys think?
I told my mum that I wanted her to walk me down the aisle and her reaction was stronger than I thought it would be. She said “I can’t do that! That’s your dad’s job!” She said we can talk about it nearer the wedding date.
I would rather elope than have my dad walk me down the aisle. Although I don’t want to elope since I have put down £5k worth of deposits down. I can compromise on pretty much anything apart from this.
If my mum is reluctant, is it weird if I walk down the aisle by myself?!
Post # 3
Member
141 posts
Blushing bee
@mailingis: I think it’s totally up to you whether you walk with your mom, your dad, by yourself, or with your fiancee. You might get some raised eyebrows, but if your dad walking you down the aisle would make you uncomfortable, there’s no reason why you have to do it.
Post # 4
Member
336 posts
Helper bee
I had that issue when planning my wedding, which is one of the reasons why I resorted to having a civil ceremony so that no one has to walk me lol.. But one thing that A LOT of brides are doing is having BOTH of their parents walk them.. So if it meant a lot to your dad to walk you, but you didnt care much for it, you can also include your mom. Your mom on your right side and your dad on the left.. so its as though they’re both “handing you off”…
If you don’t want your dad involved at all, you are in no way obligated to have him walk you. It’s YOUR day! Do what makes you happiest and most comfortable.. So if him walking you in general bothers you, then just walk with your mom..
Post # 5
Member
157 posts
Blushing bee
My two big brothers are walking me down the aisle, (could not have my father at my wedding due to huge family problems)
its your wedding xx
Post # 6
Member
4282 posts
Honey bee
@mailingis: It’s your choice who walks you down. Or you can walk by yourself. What if both of them walk you down so you can avoid hurt feelings?
Post # 7
Member
5285 posts
Bee Keeper
Why dont they both just walk you down the aisle? I have seen this at a number of weddings
Post # 8
Member
690 posts
Busy bee
Nothing wrong with walking down the aisle by yourself. If I hadn’t eloped, that is what I would have done!
Post # 9
Member
66 posts
Worker bee
Thanks for the advice bees. I really appreciate it 
I don’t want my dad to walk me down at all. I don’t want him to play a significant part at all.
Do you know what he said to me when I first got engaged? “I’m not coming to your wedding if the weather is too warm”! He doesn’t like hot weather. That’s how selfish he is. He would rather miss his only daughter’s wedding than suffer a little heat (if it is hot). What kind of father says that to his daughter?!
I often envy brides-to-be who have a close relationship with their fathers. I wish I could be a daddy’s girl but that was never the case 
Post # 10
Member
595 posts
Busy bee
I walked down the aisle by myself. I loved it. There was no way I would have had my father do it. He wasn’t very supportive of my relationship with DH. I say do what you want to do. Talk to your mom and explain why you want her to walk you down the aisle. She should understand.
Post # 11
Member
507 posts
Busy bee
- Wedding: September 2012 - Cabin
It’s your wedding, and the closer that day gets, the more you will realize that only your and your FI’s feelings about that day matter. I was worried what everyone else would think, then I let it all go and did what I wanted. I loved every moment of my wedding and people did too. I did not want to be walked down the aisle by my father either. My DH and I walked down the aisle together. I would not change that for the world. After everyone else walked in, we had a moment in the hallway to look into each others eyes and to say I love you, and he could blow into my eyes to stop me from crying.. it was great, and so special. So you do what you want to do and what makes you happy. I did and I don’t regret it. I loved it.
Post # 12
Member
10355 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
My DH and I walked together down the aisle. We liked the symbolism of approaching the marriage together, side by side.
Post # 13
Member
4575 posts
Honey bee
@mailingis: its up to you really, this is your day to decide, so what makes you happy should be what goes, if your mom feel funny about it and thinks your dad should do it, but you dont want your dad, then walk alone, i’ve seen this before and there is nothing wrong with that and please dont worry of what people may think, they can suck it,…..its your day so you be happy that’s all, well and your DH too, of course lol….its funny that this is actually the whole reason why i even had a weddingb/c my dad wanted to do that sooo badly…..lol
Post # 15
Member
48 posts
Newbee
I don’t have a good relationship with my father, as he wasn’t around for 90% of my life. He will not be invited to my wedding & I most certainly would not even consider having him walk me down the aisle. I will be walking solo, and I’m perfectly fine with that!
Post # 16
Member
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
I wasn’t too keen on walking with my dad, but it would have rocked the boat too much with my family. Both parents walking me down wasn’t an option, so dad was going to walk me down, mom was going to meet us at the front, lift my veil, and walk with us the last steps together.
My dad ended up passing away two months before my wedding, and my mom was NOT going to walk with me. So, the church actually encouraged my then-FI and I to walk down the aisle together.
Best. Decision. Ever. There was a little drama about not having my grandfather walk me down, but in the end, several people pointed out that I was MUCH more relaxed and calm walking with DH. Had I walked with Grandpa, all of my family would have been boo-hooing that it wasn’t my dad, and I would have been a mess, too (I was definitely a grandpa’s little girl, not daddy’s).
I sincerely hope you don’t wind up in the same circumstances that I was in, but go for what makes you happy and comfortable.