(Closed) Does religious conversation bother you if you’re not religious?

posted 9 years ago in Secular
  • poll: Does religious conversation bother you if you're not religious?
    I'm religious myself so it doesn't bother me at all : (37 votes)
    12 %
    I'm not religious but it doesn't bother me : (29 votes)
    10 %
    It's a little annoying/preachy but I can overlook it : (133 votes)
    44 %
    It bothers me : (77 votes)
    26 %
    I'm religious and it bothers me : (24 votes)
    8 %
  • Post # 86
    Member
    546 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    Wow this topic has blown up!

    Both my Fiance and I were raised catholic…

    Now I consider myself agnostic and my Fiance considers himself an atheist.

    I do find it annoying when people bring up religion in everyday conversations. I even hate that absolutely everyone assumes that we are getting married in a catholic church.

    Yes, I was forced to go to church growing up, and NO I AM NOT GETTING MARRIED IN A CHURCH!

    I have a habbit of doing what your husband does and just kinda walk away from the conversation. Totally not what I should do, but I much rather go watch grass grow then listen to someone preach to me.

    Post # 87
    Member
    1679 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I was thinking about this thread this morning and sure enough, it’s still going.  ๐Ÿ™‚

    I thought I’d add that the highly educated people I know when it comes to religion (people who have followed a vocation or the academics who have studied this stuff for years) don’t inject religion in secular conversations.  You can imagine the conclusions I draw when someone does it.

    Post # 88
    Member
    7429 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2009

    I went to Catholic school for 6 years, which is the reason why I don’t believe in it now. It gave me a lot of time to really think about what the bible says, and realize that its nothing but a manmade fairy tale to give people something to believe in.  It always amazes me that deeply religious people think that Paganism is witchcraft, yet some things in the bible can only be explained by it…

    But anyway, to answer the post, I do get annoyed by it only if it seems that the person is pushing their beliefs  on me. People don’t realize that I’m not ignorant, but actually very educated, and therefor can argue about my reasonings until i am blue in the face. But mostly, I just walk away, because one more person damning me to Hell might possibly do the trick ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Post # 89
    Member
    2825 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    I think it depends on the person and how opinionated they are… I’m not religious and I have my qualms with the Catholic Church, so if I’m having a conversation and the person starts shoving catholic views down my throat and is closed minded and won’t listen to MY views, then yes, I get really uncomfortable and I would probably remove myself… But if someone is open minded and want to SHARE their religious views with me I will gladly listen, but when I want to share what I believe they should listen too.

    I think religion should just be whatever makes you comfortable living your life and what would make you comfortable in death… I really don’t like all of the rules of churces and organized religion.  Just my opinion. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 90
    Member
    404 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I was raised in a reformed Jewish home and went to Hebrew school for at least 10 years, but I have never believed in god and I do have some disdain for organized religion.  Fiance was raised Catholic and has pretty similar beliefs to me.  We both get annoyed when people push their religions on us- but i don’t mind if someone says they are praying for me or god will help me through.  I think it is a little strange, but understand where they are coming from. 

     

    As for some of the drama that this thread brought up before, I think it is important to note that as a nonbeliever, I of course think I am more enlightened than believers.   I understand that a believer would feel they are more enlightened than me.  Trying to tell me I am missing out in life by not having a relationship with god or jesus would be the same as me telling you that you are wasting precious hours of your life at church or temple or wherever you may go.  Therefore there is no need for you to prosthelytize just as I will not do it to you, unless we are prepared for the repurcussions of such a discussion. 

    Post # 91
    Member
    1137 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    As a Jew, I get extremely uncomfortable and borderline offended when anyone injects religion into a non-religious conversations or situations. I was raised in a very diverse area and most people were very conscious that their neighbors didn’t necessarily share their religious beliefs, so I didn’t really encounter this in my childhood.

    It wasn’t until I went away to school and then entered the workforce which pulls from a wider geographic area that I realized that there are actually people out there who think that everyone is (or should be) Christian and follow the beliefs outlined in the New Testament.

    Even if it’s something as simple as a cashier wishing me a “blessed” day, I get uncomfortable. It’s just ignorant to think that everyone going through your line needs a religious-based affirmation.

    And don’t even get me started on people who think I need to be “saved” or “find Jesus”. It makes me borderline hostile. I once had a coworker who, when they found out I was Jewish, seeked me out and said to me “We Christians love and embrace our Jewish brothers and sisters. We realize that they are just Christians who haven’t found Jesus yet.” It took every fiber in my being not to kick her in the teeth….

    Post # 92
    Member
    2580 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @CanAmBride: I am also Jewish, and I live in a small town in Texas. Many people have not ever met a Jewish person before. The affirmations don’t bother me so much (I think those people have only good intentions and may not consider people do not share their beliefs), but the idea of needing to be “saved” does.

    I am respectful of others’ beliefs, and I hope they will be respectful of mine as well. I enjoy being Jewish. While as in any religion there are certainly fundamentalists, in general I find my religious experience to be more about culture, heritage, learning, and using Jewish values in everyday life more than feeling that my personal beliefs are considered “right” or “wrong” on every issue. Disagreement is allowed and encouraged, and at least in the community in which I was raised, we were able to form our own set of beliefs.

    I also believe that truth is relative, and no one (and no religion) has a monopoly of truth. I feel there is some truth and value to most things we choose to believe in, and a great deal of the value ascribed to religion is in its ability to offer comfort and guidance to people.

    That said, I think proselytizing can be very dangerous. I am happy to believe what I believe and I am happy for you to believe what you believe. I do not appreciate when someone tells me I am wrong and my beliefs are wrong. The basis of most religions is love, compassion, and leading a better life, and I do not think damning people to hell or telling them they are excluded from salvation exemplifies those values. For some people, when they think they are opening their hearts they are also closing their minds.

    Whew! That was long, but I’m glad I got it off my chest. I’ve been reading this thread since last night and I usually don’t like to get involved in the heavier WB discussion, but on this thread I did want to say my part.

    Post # 93
    Member
    592 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    It bothers me and I agree with almost everything crayfish has said.

    For me, the bible, among other religious scriptures, is nothing more than stories. A compilation of tales with great morals, like a book of fables. I don’t think virgins get pregnant, that anyone can walk on water or that someone who is several hundred years old managed to get a male and female of every species of mammal, insect etc. onto a big boat. Basic logic and science tells me that these things haven’t happened. But it doesn’t make the stories any less entertaining or interesting for me – I just recognize them as fiction. I respect other people’s right to believe what they believe, but trying to convince me otherwise really is a lost cause.

    My biggest pet peeve with religious fundamentalists is their readiness to apply their religious teachings to political causes. Using your religious beliefs to infringe on the basic constitutional rights of minorities, women, and children (gay marriage, abortion rights, the teaching of evolution etc.) really gets my goat. This expectation and or line of reasoning is the pinnacle of why religious people thinking that their beliefs should be applied to everyone around them annoys me. And really, in the end, it gives their more rational peers a bad rap.

    So yes, when someone tries to tell me that my heart yearns for God and so forth, or uses the bible to make an argument about something completely unrelated to religion I get annoyed. I know a lot of religious people who are still capable of subscribing to common logic and I really respect that.

    Post # 94
    Member
    232 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    @Miss Lilac: Agreed. It always confuses me when people say ‘God says…’ 

    Not really, I do believe the Bible was written by people. So God hasn’t actually said anything.

    I agree with many of the previous posters, including the thread hijacking Mr Katy Elle lol.

    I too find that kind of religious posturing offensive. 

    As an Atheist I feel that trying to educate the ‘none believers’ is not only patronising, but incredibly arrogant and offensive. To imply that you know more than somebody else just because you follow a religion is not only rude, but also works directly from the assumption that grown adults are incapable of making their own decisions about what’s best for them and what they believe based on the knowledge they’ve acquired for themselves.

    It often feels as if an Atheist has to mind what they say so as not to offend those with beliefs, while we are often not granted the same respect by the deeply religious. I’m all up for intelligent debate where nobody has to push onto anybody else- yet sadly I’ve yet to encounter that when it comes to religious discussions.

    Post # 95
    Member
    25 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    This topic was like misshoneybun said, pointless. Even if it was just to hear other “opinions” it ALWAYS ends up bad with people getting offended. Chill out.

    Post # 97
    Member
    198 posts
    Blushing bee

    As an athiest it irks me a little, but I just usually smile and nod. My family background includes many religions and I am respectful of everyone’s beliefs. 

    @MissCherryLemonade: I’ve read this whole thread and while there were disagreements, they were mostly civil. You can’t go throughout life without getting offended. Sometimes it happens. It’s how you handle it that matters.

    Post # 98
    Member
    4369 posts
    Honey bee

    I was raised as a Catholic and was pretty religious as a child. Now I am basically an atheist. Darling Husband is an atheist also, but the rest of my family is still pretty Catholic.

    I am tolerant of other people’s religion, because to me, it doesn’t really affect me what other people believe. The point where it annoys me is when religious people try to use it to control political system and social morality, and when someone brings it up in a non-religious conversation, like what happened to your Fiance. I also don’t like door to door proselytizers, but I can usually just say no thanks.

    If/When someone says something like “Jesus will open your heart…” or whatever, I am insulted. I feel that the speaker is saying somehow I am inadequate to them because of my lack of religion. I will also add that if I’m talking to someone and they bring god or Jesus or Allah or whatever into the conversation, they lose credibility in my eyes. I realize this is a bias I have, and I try to talk myself back from it when I realize it happening, but I do admit I do it nonetheless. 

    The way I see it, I don’t go around telling people they are nonesensical for believing a fairy sky man, they shouldn’t disrespect me by saying I need whatever religion they’re selling.

    Post # 99
    Member
    25 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    @KatyElle: You know, I’ve seen your posts numerous amounts of times and most of the time each time you have something to say you come across as totally snarky. Your not the “queen bee” if thats what you think. I know people are probably afraid to say anything because weddingbee likes to ban anyone that doesn’t shit rainbows but I AM going to say something, you need to get off your high horse. Not that hard of a concept is it? just my OPINION.

    The topic ‘Does religious conversation bother you if you’re not religious?’ is closed to new replies.

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