(Closed) Does the groom help you out?

posted 9 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
Member
3363 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

We have done almost everything together with the exception of my dress.  I do have a feeling that I will be deciding on "girl-stuff" like bridesmaid gifts alone though.  He was so enthusiastic about the cake…it was adorable!

Post # 4
Member
329 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

My Fiance is totally into it! In fact, he gets really pissed off when vendors are like "the bride often chooses to do this" or whatever. he basically chose all the flowers and is very proud.

Stuff I’ve done solo: everything with my dress/appearance, bridesmaid gifts, and DIY aspects of invitations and decor. He’s enthusiastic, but not very crafty. 

Post # 5
Member
997 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010 - The Pierre Hotel

My FH has been surprisingly involved.  He has definite opinions on what he doesn’t like, but once we rule those out, his response usually is "Go with whichever you’ll be happiest with." 

There are definitely some details that I care more about than he does though – I had a laugh yesterday when I showed him four different envelopes (for the save the dates) where I wrote each address in a different style of handwriting.  I asked him which looked the best and I could tell from his face that they all looked the same to him, lol

Post # 6
Member
113 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Definitely! He will offer opinions- although usually only when I ask for them. But he’s been the most help with projects, especially the invitations. I would never have gotten them finished without him! He shows a reasonable amount of interest in the wedding stuff. He’s very into design, so it’s not too surprising.

Post # 7
Member
199 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

My FH has been very involved with a lot of stuff, the cake was his creation. I think that as far as my dress he has stayed away but I still consult on ideas and other stuff. I always say it’s OUR wedding.

Post # 8
Member
1357 posts
Bumble bee

Mine tries to stay as uninvolved as possible. An impossible task since it seems to be all I talk about! Although, I must say being on these boards has allowed me to brainstorm with other people than just him! I like to say he has an opinion, and I like when he gets involved, but ultimately I just want his approval about what I have already picked. And that drives him crazy. 🙂 He will be so happy when the wedding is finally here!

Post # 9
Member
88 posts
Worker bee

Completely involved and will even pretend to be interested in areas where he could care less (invitations).  We would elope otherwise because I refuse to do this by myself, even with the help of the planner.

Post # 10
Member
137 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Mine has been involved but not over crazy. Seems like the only stuff he has a opnion about is the stuff i want to set in stone.lol so that can be a pain in the back side. He has been pretty busy with work related stuff and has promised me he will give me all his attention as we get closer. We are still a yr out so i hope he keeps to his word.

Post # 11
Member
1266 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I honestly think my Fiance has done as much or more than I have.

He has gone to more meetings that I have (only in regards to venue)

He has gone to flowers, cake, Bridesmaid or Best Man dress shopping, Bridesmaid or Best Man jewellery shopping, etc etc and dont think he is one of these like controlling Fiance who need things there way, hes not like that. He is just concerned about stress on me, and doesnt want me to be overwhelmed and help with everything (as when we planned our 1st wedding I freaked out because of the stress and called off the wedding…) so he just doesnt want a repeat, but he seems very happy and content, he is quite into it actually…

Oh my Fiance, I love him so

Post # 12
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Not so much. I pick out or DIY things, send him a mock up on the computer, ask for his opinion, and I move on from there. If he hates it, I specifically ask what he wants to change. If he’s apathetic, I do what I think will look best. I have the taste in the relationship and "get" how it will all come together. He doesn’t envision well. AND he has some of the dumbest ideas, anyways

But then again, my Fiance lives in GA and I live here, so taking him to like, a cake vendor or photographer wasn’t really feasible. So due to OUR situation, no, he doesn’t help a lot. And he isn’t one of those guys who will be like "yes we need a signature martini!" even though I am…and it’s a lot of work. I’m all about the little things. But if he lived here, I’d have him help more. 

Post # 13
Member
18 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2009

My Fiance has been great at helping out with the wedding!  He asked at the beginning what he could take on, since he’s a very do-ahead-and-finish-early kind of guy and I am a total procrastinator.

Things that were his responsibility from the beginning:
– honeymoon
– DJ
– groom and groomsmen attire
– wedding website
– collecting his pictures for the slideshow and scanning them
– managing the guest list (tracking RSVPs and thank you gifts)

Things that he has since also done:
– invitation inserts and direction cards (I designed them and he printed them out at work and had them cut to size)
– menu cards (he designed them himself and printed them and cut them up, now he’s super excited to use my corner punch, which I showed him how to use, and make the corners of each menu look lacy and cute)

He’s been involved in every other decision (except for my attire and look) and has given very definite opinions and feedback.  He is also been super helpful with crafty or DIY tasks, like stuffing invitations, making table numbers and picking out gifts and goody bags for the wedding party.

Last night we were at Michael’s and he was chuckling at how before all the wedding stuff, he’s never stepped foot in one, and now he’s been there more than he can count.

Post # 14
Member
359 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Nope. here’s why- We’re also looking at buying a house right now, and the stress of that would drive me nuts, figuring out who to get fir financing,etc. He, on the other hand, hates details, which is what a wedding is all about. Thus, he is managing house-hunting, and I manage the wedding. Each of us gets a daily update, and all major decisions are mutually agreed upon.

So, the wedding is all mine. He WILL be responsible for travel and hotel (it’s a DW), but he has months before that comcerns him. This is working quite well for the both of us…

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