(Closed) Does your FI / FH help you with most of the housework?

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Does your FI/FH help you with most of the housework?
    I do most of the housework, he just needs to keep the house in order, and help whenever he can. : (53 votes)
    24 %
    My husband is wonderful man, he helps me with most of the housework without me asking. : (98 votes)
    45 %
    My husband helps me with most of the housework, but I have to ask/remind him. : (43 votes)
    20 %
    We does half way each, and deviding the tasks (list below what he does) : (19 votes)
    9 %
    I clean my mess, and he cleans up hiss mess. : (4 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    3772 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    We have a rule.. whoever cooks doesn’t do the dishes. So since I normally cook, hubby is the one who normally cleans up afterwards. We both clean up the house at the same time (its a small place so it doesn’t take long). We both do our own laundry… Hubby is still wary of combining and sharing laundry duty since he’s afraid of ruining my clothes, so he does his and I do mine. We alternate doing towels. I know this will change soon, we haven’t been living together that long. 

    Post # 4
    Member
    772 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @zoecn:  I don’t think there is a right or wrong way to handle, it’s up to the individual couple.  My husband works a lot more than me so I do the majority of the housework – cook dinner every night, straighten up, dishes, laundry, etc.  He helps me clear the table every night after dinner and one night a week I cash in a Clean Up card, where he has to do it all by himself!  He hates when I pull the card! 

    He also does all of the gross stuff – takes out trash, kills bugs, yard work, and cleans the grimey stuff in the shower.

    So when all is said and done, I probably do about 75 – 80%.  But it works!

    And for what it’s worth – his Mom did EVERYTHING for him and his Dad… me and her actually have a conversation about it, she said “Oh, I just do all of it for them.”  I was like, “Nope, not at my house!”  Fortunately it wasn’t difficult to get my husband on board despite his Mom. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    979 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    My Fiance does more cleaning than I do.  I cook, he does most of the cleaning except when he asks me to help. haha I do the laundry though!

    Post # 8
    Member
    1042 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @zoecn:  I also envy whoever voted ‘My husband is wonderful man, he helps me with most of the housework without me asking’!!!

    My Fiance helps, but I HAVE to ask him too. His chores consist of taking out the garbage(after I ask), vacuum(after I ask), load and empty dishwasher(after I ask), and he does his own laundry. Thankfully I don’t have to ask him to do this! We made an agreement that he has to do all the yard work (we have a big yard) in the summer too.

    He has never ever cleaned our bathroom. Not even once. Never dusted. And to be honest, I just don’t trust he would do as good of a job as me.. When I clean, I clean reallllly good. I become posessed and everything has to be spotless.

    The things I do ask him to do, he usually does them halfass. Meh. I still love him dearly! I have decided there is no point in nagging. It is who he is. I don’t love to clean but damn I feel good when the house is spotless!

    Post # 9
    Member
    106 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    We’ve had a few large blow outs about this in regards to my feeling that I did the most work. I’ve learned to change my expectations a bit in exchange for less fighting and feelings of frustration.

    I do most of the house work (granted my Fiance will argue he does) but he does more of the cooking and will help out without me asking since I don’t care to nag or argue. He pays attention to when I clean and then feels bad and will start doing the dishes or whatever.

    I’ll do the laundry (folding and putting away), garbage/recycling take out, tidy the bedroom, change the sheets, take the dog for walks, clean the bathroom, unpack/pack dishwasher. He’ll take care of the (other) pets, deal with the garage and outdoor space if it gets cluttered, cook and tidy/clean the kitchen.

     

    Post # 11
    Member
    3772 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    @zoecn:  no not really. He mostly does it on his own… or I look at him and he knows exactly what he needs to do. When he’s super tired he just does them in the morning before work (I know wierd). I’ve tried to do the dishes after I cook, but he yells at me and says that he’s going to take care of them. lol. If he sees me starting to pick up the clutter around the house, he gets the cue and jumps on in. It probably helps that he likes to have things clean.

    oh but when it comes to the bathroom.. yea that’s normally my job. Which is fine because it’s my hair all over the place. I just get annoyed cleaning up around the toilet.

    Post # 13
    Member
    106 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @zoecn:  honestly I think he knows I do more but will REFUSE to admit it out loud, god forbid he lose that arguement haha. Thats why he either tells me to stop doing X and he’ll do it later or he’ll start randomly doing the dishes. haha.

    Post # 14
    Member
    1042 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @zoecn:  YEP, my Fiance will usually leave a mess FROM cleaning. How is that even possible?!?

    Post # 15
    Member
    986 posts
    Busy bee

    He actually does more than I do, usually. Now that I’m not working full time, I’ve taken over pretty much everything. Also, I have just a hint of OCD so I much prefer things my way anyway 😉 

    Post # 16
    Member
    11272 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    it’s pretty even.

    i do all of the cooking and 99% of the laundry.  i enjoy doing those things so i don’t think of it as a chore.  he does the bathrooms b/c i don’t like doing toilets.

    we both share in the other duties.  

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