Post # 1
I’m asking this because recently I’ve been craving some romantic things to happen in my relationship with Fiance. Maybe because Valentine’s Day is coming up I don’t know. I talked to my Fiance about doing something romantic one night. Such as just going out to dinner, seeing a movie, going on a day trip. Things like that are very romantic to me. I don’t need to have expensive gestures, flowers all the time or stuff like that.
Last weekend I suggested to him that maybe we could go do something romantic. He asked like what and when I told him he didn’t know. He said it was a little late to plan something like that. To me, you don’t have to plan stuff like, you can be spontaneous. And when I told him I just wanted to go out and have some fun he responded with this: “Well I just don’t know what you want to do! I don’t know how to be romantic!”
He says this all the time but in all truth he can be a very romantic guy, very sweet. He doesn’t like how I love fairy tales and all these cute stories of love and romance. He says it’s all stories and not real. I asked him if we could go see that movie The Vow on Valentine’s Day and he said yes. When I told him it was based on true events he scoffed and said yeah right. Stories like that didn’t happen in real life. He then confessed he’s not a big believer in romance. You couldn’t be all dreamy and gooey in a relationship. I was taken aback because he can be so sweet and romantic with me but then scoff at other people being like that.
I’m not angry at him nor do I want to change his outlook. I just want to know if anyone else’s FI/SO feels like this in a relationship. I just wanted to read some insight. Sorry for the length of the post! Thanks!
Post # 3
It sounds like he has high expectations of what romance is, that he thinks its mushy lovey dovey stuff all of the time. I would clarify with him what exactly it is that you find romantic. So like you said,going to the movies,having dinner out together somewhere etc. He may not see this as being romantic,and see it as just normal stuff that you do together.But if you explain how this makes you feel special and loved he may realise that romance isnt all about writing love songs,or poetry or releasing doves in your loved ones honour…lol. Sometimes guys just have to be TOLD!
For example,Ive told my Darling Husband that for my birthday,all I want is a big bunch of flowers because it has never struck him to buy me any. Ever. So instead of hinting,I just outright told him
Post # 4
There are different levels of romance, I guess. Fiance does little things for me that I find romantic but he’d never call it that.
Post # 5
I don’t like rose petals and champagne, but I think Darling Husband is very romantic! His type of romance is more like picking me flowers, holding doors for me, always holding my hand, even just spending time together playing games or just joking around. I find his honest desire to spend quality time with me very romantic 🙂 Anything else might just seem forced because he’s not real suave hehe
Post # 6
Thanks for the input! I talked to Fiance about this last night and he said he was sorry for misunderstanding me. He told me he knows he can’t do all the things that are in romantic movies and he thought that’s what I meant. I told him that those are movies for a reason and I would never ever compare our relationship to that nor would I want him to be like that. I guess communication goes a long way.