(Closed) Doesn't want to marry me anymore:( wedding is off! :( :(

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
9793 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

You shouldnt have to change yourself for anyone much less the one who should love and accept you completely! Im sure it stings terribly but I bet youll be so grateful this happened when you meet the right guy for you. Sorry bee!

Post # 4
521 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Oh honey, I’m so sorry.  Kudos to you though for making the right decision here.  You shouldn’t be anyone that you aren’t!  Best of luck to you.  I would recommend Preownedweddingdresses.com or oncewed.com for selling your dress.

Post # 6
1124 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

The fact that you felt the need to change everything about yourself breaks my heart. No woman should have to compromise so much of who she is in order to appease a man. Working on your jealousy and insecurity is important not just for your future relationships, but also to help yourself become a better person. This doesn’t mean you need to change what you like and who you are.

Money isn’t as impotant as a a satisfactory life. I hope you had wedding insurance but if not, you should be able to recoup some of your money by selling off your dress and any other items you purchased for the wedding.

Good luck, OP.

Post # 8
6009 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

Aw, I am so sorry you are hurting from this. But I promise you when the dust settles you will realize it’s for the better. Better to get out now than be married and figure it out years later (like I did).


Post # 9
1920 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@BrideToBe14:  I’m so sorry, but it sounds like it’s the right decision and you’re aware of that. Don’t change who you are. The right guy is out there and once you move on from this ordeal, you’ll find him. Best of luck!

Post # 11
2571 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@BrideToBe14:  Oh lady, I’m so sorry this happened, but better now than after your vows were said, right? Take a few days to cry, mope, feel sorry for yourself, whatever you need to do, etc.. Then when you are ready, get back up and seize the day – being your true self not someone fabricated that your ex wanted you to be.

As for selling wedding dresses, I sold mine on eBay – had an auction going for it. However, mine wasn’t a very traditional dress – it was a short reception dress from David’s Bridal. Worth a shot though!

Post # 13
8041 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013


I know you don’t want to hear it now… but this is for the best and you will be a stronger person for this! It’s so hard to try to be someone you’re not. You will find someone who appreciates you for who you are. Dwell and mope for a while, but soon you will feel relieved and you can get on with your life.

Post # 15
9887 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@BrideToBe14:  * Hugs *  I am so, so sorry you’re going through this.  But, the right man will never, ever make you feel inadequate in any way or that you have to change yourself to please him.  This guy is not good enough for you!  True love doesn’t make you twist yourself into a pretzel and feel insecure.  True love will bolster you, reassure you and make you feel loved unconditionally.  When you truly feel secure in yourself with a man you’ll know he’s the right one.  You don’t have to settle for less.  Real love isn’t that hard and if it is it’s a sign it’s the wrong one.

I’m not saying it’s not worthwhile to work on yourself – but for the right reasons – for YOU and nobody else.  It sounds like this man has spent a lot of time undermining your self-confidence and that’s not healthy for you.

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