(Closed) Doing his/mine/our $$…hammering out the details

posted 8 years ago in Money
Post # 3
3942 posts
Honey bee

We only recently combined money so we are still figuring out what works for us and adjusting it. What we did was exactly what youre thinking of-combined checking/savings, and personal checking. We have the majority of our paychecks deposited into the joint checking account each week and a small portion is automatically deposited into our personal accounts. I use my personal account for student loans and car payments (those are the only bills we don’t have combined), going out with friends, clothes, hair cuts, etc. Basically, its my fun money ๐Ÿ™‚ We are still playing around with the amounts each month. We pretty much estimated what we spend on personal stuff but like I said, we are still adjusting and figuring out what works.

My goal after the new year is to really start getting better with our savings account. We have some big house projects we need to save for, I want to increasse our emergency fund, start a vacation account, and get on track.

So, I dont have any good advice for you but I’m interested in the other responses ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 4
5778 posts
Bee Keeper

I’m no help as we have always combined everything as it is all our money. Personal money? Why? Can’t you just withdraw what you want or write a check for anything you need? Do you feel the need to explain it to him? I don’t get it now nor do I suppose I ever will. lol We’ve always had a seperate ‘stash’ for buying things we may want to hide (like for a birthday or anniversary) but I’ve never felt the need to seperate everything. We have always made almost the exact same salary too (until recently) but we never used percentages to deposit money. It all always went in the bank to whatever accounts we wanted it to go into. I spend,he spends…what real difference does it make?

I think my daughters are doing something similar, but it drives me crazy.

Post # 5
6892 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

I’m right there with you! We are working it out right now as well. I’ve talked to a few friends, and I’ll share what they’ve told me. Actually, my mom’s was the best. She and my dad make comparable salaries (both within 5K of eachother).

They each have a separate checking/savings/investment and then have the joint checking/savings/investments/college funds. (Younger sibs still in school.)

To break it up, they’ve calculated how much they need for bills each month and put that plus __% into the joint account. (Bills including, well, everything joint.) What’s left over is theirs to do as they please. For them, it’s usually investments or savings, but they don’t like to control if the other shops or whatnot because they both make good money and see no reason to control the others’ spending as long as bills get paid and there is money left over. She said their savings/investments have really grown over the past 10 years. So there’s that. Hope that helps a little.

Post # 6
2090 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

We do this, broken down by set amounts (but I think you could easily do percentages too).

We add up: mortgage, HOA fees, insurance (house and car), cable, gas, electricity, and a built in cushion amount – divide that roughly in half (we make about the same, my husband makes a little more, so he contributes a little more) and each have that dollar amount directly deposited into our joint checking account for paying our mutual bills each month.

The reminder of our pay is ours – we each have personal checking and savings accounts, as well as 401k, etc. through work. I send a chunk of my pay to savings each month, and pay my personal bills with the rest (student loans, cell phone, car, etc.). We are open about how much we save each month, so we’re on the same page about that.

We usually try to split large purchases (i.e., over $500). One of us will make the purchase and the other will write them a check, or just buy all the food for the month (or something comparable) so it events out in the end. Hope this is helpful.

Post # 7
1820 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

To answer your question, we only have a joint checking, and then we each have person checking/savings.  Out of the joint account, we pay for everything that we use or enjoy together – so that means mortgage, utilities, groceries + household items, house cleaning service, etc., and all of our joint entertainment costs – going out to dinner, movies, etc.  We figured out how much we spend on all of that stuff per month (it took a few months of trial and error to accurately account for the entertainment portion), divided that amount by half, and that is how we each deposit into the joint account every month.  We use our personal accounts for everything not shared – haircuts, shopping, dinner out with friends, gifts for each other, etc.  It is not a perfect system, but it works for us.

Post # 8
7300 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

We have a joint checking and I have a personal savings. He knows about the savings. It’s like a “pay yourself first” account and keeps that money out of the way.

Post # 9
2066 posts
Buzzing bee

All of our accounts are joint, which I know won’t work for you, but here’s a different way to view savings.

We sat down and figured out financial goals – establishing an emergency fund, remodeling the house, maxing out our retirement funds, etc.  We prioritized those goals and decided what we were going to save for each goal.  We opened an account for each goal and money is automatically deposited in each account.  

Post # 10
10366 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

All of our money goes into one account, and then we have separate “spending money” accounts that we do automatic transfers into every month ($150 each per month right now while we are saving for a trip/house, might go up after we’re done with the aggressive savings). We also have a high interest savings that our emergency fun is in, and we are constantly updating our CDs with excess savings to that our house fund increases at a faster rate than just a high interest savings account.

Post # 12
447 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Sara from 2000dollarwedding.com has a neat system of pooled finances: 


It’s actually way more complicated than what I do (we added each other’s names to each of our accounts, but otherwise it’s pretty much the same – we have separate checking accounts which we use to pay off our separate credit cards.  We have one joint savings account).  But my system is mostly borne out of laziness – eventually, we’ll have 1 checking account but maintain our separate credit cards.  We just don’t do that right now because there’s a Chase near his work and a Citi near mine, and neither of us wants to trek to the ATM ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 13
5921 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

It sounds similar to what we do too.

We have a joint checking and savings account.  Every month we deposit the bill money, with a little cushion in case of fluctuation, etc. into the joint checking.  With all remaining money, we deposit 50% into the joint savings, and divide the remaining 50% between the two of us for fun money in seperate (but linked) checking accounts.

It works really well for us.  We each get the same amount of spending money per month, no matter who makes more.  We can do whatever we want with it.  I shop, Fiance saves to buy some new gadget every few months or so ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 14
353 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

We have a joint checking account where we both put in the same amount every month ($1500 each) for bills and mortgage payments. Everything else is our own to do with as we please, but at the moment we both try and save for the wedding as we’re paying for it all ourselves.

The reason we chose a set amount is that my Fiance has his own business and his income varies somewhat over the year so it was easier to work with than a percentage. So even if my Fiance may have more money left in his account after paying for bills etc he has other expenses related to his business.

For savings we tend to save up in our own separate accounts and then pool the money when we need it for something.

Post # 16
5271 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Ugggh, yeah we need to do this too….

When we intially lived together we paid on a percentage based on salary. Hubs makes like 30K+ more then me, so saying we both pay X wasn’t fair. So we looked at our monthly income and based on a percentage (for example he paid 70% and I paid 30%) of our total bills but this was based on our salary, so the same percentage of what we earned monthly was spend on bills.

Now, we are changing things up, and have been meaning to go to the bank to set an account where we put our checks in and all bills, food, and joint entertainment (i.e. going out to dinner, drinks, shows, etc.) are paid out of this main account, then we would both get a monthly “allowence” so to speak that we could spend on personal wants (like if i want new clothes and he wants something new for his drums) this “allowence” would be the same dollar amount for each of us.

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