Post # 1
TO DO or NOT TO DO.
i cant decide. its been done at every wedding ive been too. & my dad was in utter shock when i told him i dont think we were going to do it.
i half think its tacky / half think meh whatever, its done at almost every wedding so what the heck.
i suppose my BIGGEST fear is that no one would do it and i wouldnt even be able to get through one full song. that 3 people would line up to dance with me. whoopdie do. everyone knows that when the “dollar dance” ends you can dance with me for free anyways. lol. PLUS most guests should have already arrived with a card and/or gift & have spent some sort of money to get to the wedding. even if just driving 20 miles. so why ask for MORE money?
weve got about 200-215 guests (rsvps are still rollin in) and theres a lot of family members on FI’s side that i havent met because they live out of state… and a few of my distant cousins that havent met him. but i still wonder, would people dance with us or would it be up most embarrassment?
ive also seen someone do a “honeymoon fund jar” and left it up on the bar for people to place money in. but im not sure id feel comfortable with that either.
what was your experience with your dollar dance? are you having one? id love to hear why or why not!
Post # 3
@wifegoodman: Every wedding I’ve been to has had the dollar dance. I’m still not entirely sold on the idea but it doesn’t really matter to me. Most people don’t even notice the dollar dance anyway. They think about it for a second when it’s announced and it’s gone. Partly because it’s pretty common place and partly because if they think it’s tacky, it’s the dance itself. Not you. So I think I’m doing it and saying oh well. LoL
Post # 4
I didn’t have one. And honestly I’ve never seen it done in person and I didn’t know what it was prior to the Bees here discussing it. Is it a regional thing?
Post # 5
@wifegoodman: I’ve only been to one wedding where this was done, and I think it looked tacky and gift grabby, BUT it may be a regional thing and more popular / acceptable in your area. Good luck on your decision.
Post # 6
It’s huge down here. We call it a money dance. FI and I discussed not having one, but sometimes you don’t have much of a choice – I have been to weddings where they spontaneously happen because an uncle or grandparent started one. It’s usually a nice way to spend a little one on one time with guests. There’s no minimum amount, and it’s not like an auction where the highest bidder wins. The older guests really seem to like them here.
Post # 7
I didn’t have one and have never seen one. If its socially acceptable/expected in your area though, I say go for it. Personally I attend weddings with the amount intend to gift already decided and enclosed in card, but if there are other opportunities to give cash it doesn’t really bother me. Ijust don’t participate
Post # 8
I’m finding through reading the bee that this is pretty regional. No one really does it here but if it’s commonplace in your area then you might as well do it. People probably will come ready to participate!
Post # 9
I have never been to a wedding where there wasn’t a dollar dance. They are extremely common in the Midwest. I think it would be tacky if nobody did it in your area, but if it’s common, it’s not usually seen as gift grabby at all. Most people just give singles….some are generous though. It’s just kind of a fun thing here, not for the money.
Post # 10
I honestly thought this was just a Greek tradition!
Tbh as a guest, if I’d already paid to be at your wedding and written you a cheque as a gift, I wouldn’t feel comfortable being under pressure to stick money to you also. However, I wouldn’t judge you for doing it.
Post # 11
We did one at ours and my husband wasn’t initially sold on he idea since it’s not something that’s done at weddings where he is from. But he ended up having a blast with his friends. The little kids enjoyed it too and we did not hear a single complaint about it.
I think it’s a great way to have a short moment with each guest that wants to participate. We got a ton of singles from little kids, but our friends and family were quite generous and we received way more than we thought we would. On a funny note, I was done way before hubby was..and he was the one who wasn’t sure his friends/family would participate.
Post # 12
It is pretty common with my family and pretty much every wedding I’ve been to has had a dollar dance. However, I find them a bit awkward, but I know my family expects me to have one… so…
We will be having a dollar dance at my wedding, but we’re adding a twist and calling it a donation dance, you can dance with the bride or the groom, and for every $1 dance that is bought, we will donate $9 to a local charity that supplies food and shelter for battered women and their children (and is a charity that I volunteer at). So, basically for each dance we’re giving $10 to the charity. I know not everyone will agree with me on this, but I feel this is a suitable compromise.
Post # 13
I voted steer clear it’s too tacky. It’s not something we do over here and even if it was I wouldn’t have it especially as guests would have spent enough money as it is.
Post # 14
I never heard a dollar dance before I joined WeddingBee.
Post # 15
Is this regional? I’ve never seen it done and I’ve attended at least several dozen weddings.
Post # 16
It’s also part of the Polish community (of which I belong lol), but I honestly haven’t seen one done at a wedding since 1990 or so.