(Closed) Dollar Dance, tradition vs. tacky

posted 8 years ago in Music
  • poll: Dollar Dance:

    Tacky-don't do it!

    Just fine!

    Don't have a strong opinion eitherway

  • Post # 77
    7384 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @WannaBeeMrsB:  Agreed.

    I’ve been to weddings with and without the dollar dance. I find it fun, actually. We won’t be having one (simply because it doesn’t mean anything to us), but if it’s something your Fiance and his family would like to do, I would think about it. You can have your MC or DJ give a little explanation of it if you don’t think a large number of your guests will know what it is.

    Post # 78
    672 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    A dollar dance is so common where I’m from that they are expected.  For us the money isn’t stuffed or pinned to the couple, the best man and Maid/Matron of Honor collects it.

    Post # 79
    2056 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2017

    @Zhabeego:  Actually depending on the family, I could see something going like this…

    Fiance Family: Why is there no dollar dance?  It’s tradition!

    Fiance: Oh, OP didn’t think it was right to do it.

    Fiance Family: But it’s family tradition!

    Fiance: We can’t do it.

    Fiance Family: Wow, she must not like us or want to be part of the family, since she won’t do something that’s family tradition.

    So whichever way it actually happens, there may be some offended guests.

    Post # 80
    2265 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    @Apple_Blossom:  I suppose that’s possible but as the Bridge and Groom, on whom the dance will reflect, I still wouldn’t do it. 

    I’ll go a long way to preserve family harmony but embarrasing myself by begging amongst my guests isn’t one of them.

    Post # 81
    2247 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    @MrsPanda99:  Yes usually at least 5 dollars, the older guests tend to give up to $100. People bring cash bills specifically for this dance. We’re both German, recent to the US and it’s a large tradition for us. 

    Post # 82
    7813 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    @MrsN14:  Well, for goodness sake. If I knew it was a $100 dance…! Lol, just kidding. I still couldn’t do it, as it wouldn’t be accepted in my social circle. That’s amazing you can though!

    Post # 83
    36 posts
    • Wedding: July 2013

    We will not be doing this.  Pretty tacky in my book.

    Post # 84
    225 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    This article is about a cultural practice. For the accounting software, see Moneydance.

    The money dancedollar dance, or apron dance is an event at some wedding receptions in various cultures. During a money dance, male guests pay to dance briefly with the bride, and sometimes female guests pay to dance with the groom. The custom originated inPoland in the early 1900s in immigrant neighborhoods.

    Sometimes guests are told that the money will be used for the bride and groom’s honeymoon or to give them a little extra cash with which to set up housekeeping.

    Poland [edit]

    The money dance may have originated in Poland around the beginning of the 20th century. The dance takes place some time after theFirst dance, often once guests have had a chance to have a few drinks. The best man or MC or the disc jockey announces the event. Customarily, the best man begins dancing with the bride, pinning money onto her wedding gown or putting it into a purse, which she carries especially for the purpose, or into the pockets of an apron she dons over her gown especially for this dance. In a more contemporary version of this custom, the dance includes bridesmaids and other ladies who dance .

    Ukraine [edit]

    At Ukrainian weddings, the father of the bride usually begins pinning money on her dress. He is followed by the best man andgroomsmen, and, finally, by the remainder of the male guests. Another variation is where the bride’s veil is removed and given to the maid of honor and an apron is placed on the bride. Money is then placed into her apron during the dance.

    Yugoslavia [edit]

    At Yugoslavian weddings, instead of pinning the money on the bride’s gown, the male guests give the money to the best man for safe keeping.

    Hungary [edit]

    At Hungarian and Portuguese weddings[citation needed], the bride takes off her shoes and puts them in the middle of the dance floor. Then the shoes are passed around from guests to guest and each deposits a contribution.

    North America [edit]

    Mexico [edit]

    Relatives take turns dancing up to the bride and groom and pinning money on their clothes, which allows the couple to spend a few moments with each of their guests. After the money dance, the groom is ridiculed by his friends, tossed in the air while being covered with the veil, and given an apron and broom.

    Post # 85
    13647 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    It’s your wedding, too. I wouldn’t compromise on something that is a  reflection of my own  values.   

    In the predominant culture, the one  in which we live most of the time, begging for money is considered tacky.  So maybe the best way to say it is that many guests are from a background and a culture that would find being hit up for cash to be a tacky thing.  

    Post # 86
    2041 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    It’s his wedding, too. Since it’s a tradition in his family, I vote do it. The DJ/MC can explain it to folks.

    Post # 87
    4996 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    I would only do it if it’s your culture’s/community’s tradition. This is for two reasons:

    1. Your guests would understand that you’re doing it for tradtion and to get to dance with everyone, not for the money.

    2. Your guests would be prepared and bring money.

    I’ve been to weddings where it worked out (the top two things were true) and where it was very awkward. 

    Post # 88
    110 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: April 2006

    I am Greek, born and raised, and have never been to a wedding with a dollar dance. Cash gifts sure, lots and lots of stuffed little envelopes, maybe a few notes flying around during the dances, but you don’t have to pay the bride and groom to dance with you! Maybe because I live in Athens; in the country it might be different.

    Post # 89
    110 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    @Chrysoberyl:  I think almost every culture has something not great. Money dance sounds like one of them in Greek. Being in some culture doesn’t mean that something can’t be tacky. Also, it doesn’t mean that the entire culture is tacky. The most beautiful woman in the world should have a tiny bit ugly something in her, telling that part ugly doesn’t mean that woman is ugly. Personally I find it very weird rather than tacky. And if someone like my father sees (from east asian culture) this, he would be very offended and think it’s rude. 

    Oh, to the bride – I’d say don’t do it unless you think your family and friends will understand. And if you’re going to have one, spread words that it’s a part of his culture. Then it will be understood more easily.

    Post # 90
    1616 posts
    Bumble bee

    @Mee:  I think it’s just a personal opinion that it’s not great. I don’t think the dance is something widely recognized as a “cultural thing in Greece that is not great.”

    Post # 91
    1616 posts
    Bumble bee

    @akitten:  That’s probably it, I’m from Rethymno and I always see them!!

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