(Closed) Donate to charity instead of traditional wedding favor

posted 7 years ago in Favors
Post # 61
Member
1286 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

Agree with Apple_Blossom: 

MrsSmith12:  If you must do this, I think it would be fun to provide guests with small cards where they can fill in their name and choose from 2 or more charities where you will make a donation in their name. That way you’re not “forcing” anyone to “give” to a cause that they don’t like or approve, for whatever reason. It would also be a nice gesture if you could provide something for their tax write-off along with the thank you card. I agree that you don’t need to approach this as a favor considering that favors are unnecessary and you’re already doing a bunch of things like confetti pops and photo booth.

Post # 62
Member
280 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

Wow, bunch of debby downers today.  I’ve worked in the nonprofit sector for years, and I would think it’s awesome that a gift was given in my name.  Just don’t give them the guest’s contact info so they wont get spammed with emails/letters.  Maybe stay away from the really controversial orgs just to be safe.  Do what makes you happy.  I would like it.  

Post # 63
Member
769 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

If you are still open to the idea of giving your guests a tangible favour, perhaps wine jelly would be a nice option, since you mentioned your both into wine. My Fiance and I are giving our guests a jar of our favourite black cherry wine jelly (ugh, it’s so good!!), which is made by a local company in the city we are getting married in. Plus, it goes well with our winery wedding. Just an idea!

Post # 64
Member
959 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

If you’re going to do this, donate to a local org. A place that is impacting the area you and many of your guests live in. Not a giant “non profit” too focused on fundraising to change the status quo. <br /><br />But I agree with PPs about cutting other wedding costs, rather than the favor. I mean, most of the world’s problems, from pollution to cancer to slavery all stem from our gluttonous consumption…how many wage slaves does it take to make a wedding dress, you know? How many Guatemalan refugees handled your wedding flowers?

Post # 65
Member
8489 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

For anyone who finds this post in the future, just adding another vote for don’t do it, for all the reasons already given above. I totally support charitable giving and am very generous with hunger relief organizations myself. So if you want to spend the money that way instead of on favors, more power to you. I would absolutely not miss the favor at all. But if you feel the need to tell me about it though, via signs, plaques, pins, etc, I will think “oh interesting, didn’t realize you were holier-than-thou attention whores. glad I know now.” And for people saying “I saw this at a wedding and everyone thought it was great” — of course they’re going to SAY it’s a great idea! Who is going to criticize a bride’s charitable donation… at the wedding…with Aunt Delores listening in?? Trust the people on this thread who have no reason to either lie or sugarcoat. We’re just calling it how we see it — donate instead of favors, but don’t tell us about it because we don’t care about the favor until you brag about not giving us one because you’re a better person than us.

Post # 66
Member
216 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Absolutely! 

First off I did this- my husband is a decorated veteran and we donated to “The Wounded Warrior Project.” We received so many kind words from guests. 

Second- I prefer my friends supporting something close to them and appreciate it more than a trinket or an edible or nothing at all. 

Post # 67
Member
1306 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

View original reply
MrsSmith12:  I don’t understand why so many people are SO AGAINST THIS. 

Make a donation as a favor. It’s lovely. ‘Taking something away from your guests’ is such a ridiculous point of view. Like my guests are going to miss a cheesy wedding koozie or a tiny jar of honey.

one of my best friends’ husband has cystic fibrosis, and they donated to the cystic fibrosis foundation in lieu of favors and left a note at everyone’s table at their wedding. It was beautiful. How could that EVER be offensive?!?!?!

sorry for the rant 🙂 do your donation favors. We did, and everyone loved it! (We also handed out lollipops)

 

Post # 68
Member
122 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

If you don’t want to do a favor , then don’t do one. I personally think even though many of them are adorable they are just that, adorable.  But useless, wasteful etc. I personally could care less about favors and wish the practice would die off. I me here to see you get married. You can say thank you at the mic or try to visit me. I like food favors but seen even those wasted. But, my Fiance and I agree, giving to a charity on our behalf in any way, shape, or form, just smacks. I can’t put my finger on it just I hate the practice. Give to a charity of your choosing In your name, not mine. It is offensive if it is to a charity I don’t like. If you go that route chose wisely. 

Post # 71
Member
327 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

We donated to St. Judes instead of favors and my guest loved it….We did a “Chari-tree” where we displayed a tree (it was christmas time) and we had a note saying in stead of favors we were donating to St. Judes and we let everyone know the donation was designated towards “No-Mo Chemo Parties” since we were celebrating today.  Honestly, people dont give a crap about their $3 dollar wedding favor….its not that serious people! 

Post # 72
Member
15 posts
Newbee

I think personally for me I would only do a donation if the organization meant something special to me.  For instance we went to a wedding in june 2014 and the brides father had a double lung transplant in august 2013.  This is what they had on every plate.  It was great to see and very sweet

Post # 73
Member
2031 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I hate when couples do this.  It is really nice you want to make a donation, but if it is only to rub it in all your guests faces and try to make yourselves seem like the best person in the world that is just tacky.  The truly philantropic thing to do would be do donate to charity and just skip a favor all together.   Your guests won’t miss them.  

Post # 74
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I am really surprised by a lot of these reactions. 

<br />We did something a little different.  We did favors, after debating for awhile whether or not to do them.  However, one of our guests gave us a gift certificate to donorschoice.org as a wedding gift.  It’s a website for teachers to request funding for projects, supplies, etc.  We used the gift certificate and then additional money that we got as gifts to fully fund a project that was on the website.  When we sent the thank you notes we informed people that we used some of our gift money to make a donation to a classroom of autistic students.  

Post # 75
Member
1306 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

we didn’t donate because we wanted to “make ourselves look like the best people in the world”. we donated to the cystic fibrosis foundation and let everyone know it was in lieu of favors as it was the perfect opportunity to spread awareness of a disease that affects several people we know, including the husband of one of our bridesmaids, and the daughter of another. let’s make that VERY CLEAR.

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