- 7 years ago
- Wedding: May 2012
DISCLAIMER: I am just writing this as a generic post. It popped into my head today while I was sitting in church. I’m not trying to attack anybody or insinuate anything. This is just off of my own personal experiences.
I was not the nicest person to a friend of mine when she got married. It all started when she got engaged. This was a few years back. Now, part of it was my own jealousy. The other part was that I had just arrived to spend the weekend with my then-boyfriend (now fiance) and friends. Right before she had announced the news of her engagement, I found out that my boyfriend decided to choose the out of state grad school over the one in town and that my best friend was moving 2,000 miles away. Hearing that my friend had just gotten engaged to her boyfriend (which, they had been together a month longer than my boyfriend and I, and they had broken up a few times where we had not) sent MAJOR sparks of jealousy. I’m embarrassed to admit that when we all went out to celebrate, my best friend and I could have been nicer to the newly engaged friend.
I was asked to be in this friend’s wedding, and I wasn’t much help. I did swallow my pride and got over the “engagement race”, but I was not a good bridesmaid. Granted, this friend lived four hours away, but I wasn’t able to go down for showers or the bachelorette party. I pretty much just showed up for the dress rehearsal and the wedding. By this point in time (it was a few years later), I knew my boyfriend and I were going to be engaged soon, so I was in a better mood.
Looking back (now that I’m engaged and planning our wedding), I’m really ashamed of the way I acted towards this friend. I don’t know if she knew how I felt–we’ve never talked about it–but I know I could have been a better friend. I wis I would have sucked it up and been happy for her, and realized that it wasn’t a race and that my time would come. I’m not saying that I needed to be calling every night, asking about plans, but I certainly could have put forth more effort. I definitely could have been a little more happier for her.
I know this is a ramble, and I am not trying to insinuate that all people who are waiting (or even planning a wedding at the same time as a friend) will think this way. I wish I would have had a reality check when going through this with my friend.
Anyways, I just wanted to share my experience…that’s all…hopefully if someone is going through this, they can read this and not make the same mistake I did! It was just on my mind and I wanted to share. You can return to your regularly scheduled Weddingbee posting :-).