(Closed) Don’t feel like a bride anymore !

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
166 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

((Hugs)) Sounds like a rough situation to be in. I don’t know that I can give much advice but the first thing that popped into my head is why are they rushing you? Wedding planning is supposed to be fun for you not uber stressful, sit back relax (if possible) and try to enjoy it. If you feel llike you need to slow down, then just slow down, it’s your wedding not theres and you have to be comfortable with the decisions. So what if you changed your dress, a lot of brides do and wind up with tw dresses. As for his sister’s being your bridesmaids, is there any way to switch them over to his side? That’s what Fiance and I are doing, we decided that our families belong on our sides no matter if they’re male or female. You should have people up there who YOU love and who love YOU, not someone you picked out of feeling like you had to. If you want to change the bridesmaids then just go for it. I give you full permission and if his family wants to bitch about it tell ’em they don’t have to come. ((Hugs)) and if you want to you can always message me and I’ll give you some encouragement!

Post # 4
Member
137 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

In my honest opinion, you need to make sure that this is YOUR wedding. Everything about this day should be tailored to you and your Fiance. Accommodating your FI’s family is one thing, but not to the point that you feel so stressed you want to cancel. This is going to be the first day of the rest of your life! There will be indecisive moments, but enjoy yourself!

Unless his family is paying for everything (and even if they are!) You should nicely let them know how you feel.

Although, it may just time for a ‘bridezilla moment.’ 🙂

Feel Better!

Post # 5
Member
125 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

You should breathe….you need to get a hold of yourself.  Be more confident with your decisions.  Maybe you are looking at too many wedding sites and you are suffering from wedding overload?  Don’t let their pressure get you because you won’t have a good time at your wedding and that all the matters…not the things at the wedding or even the people….it all about how you feel inside about your Fiance.   Vent to your friend.  If your FI’s fam is paying for the wedding then maybe you just have to realize that you have to make some compromises a long the way. 

Post # 6
Member
5822 posts
Bee Keeper

I think you should promote your friend (the one who is actually HELPING you…) to Maid/Matron of Honor.  If his sister doesn’t step up to her duties, she can be demoted to Bridesmaid or Best Man.  If you were pressured to include his sisters in the first place, you shouldn’t have to compromise the person who is standing next to you the whole way and who will be most helpful to you through this process.  I think making that change will start a big fight, but it will also draw the line in the sand.  You sound like you have let your Fiance and his family dictate your decisions, and even your timeline.  If they are paying for the wedding, consider refusing the money.  If that just isn’t an option in your mind, then sit down with Fiance and his parents and explain that you feel rushed, that you have plenty of time to make your decisions, and that their behavior has made you very stressed out.  The number one person who SHOULD be standing up for YOU is your FI!!  If he’s not 100% behind you he is WRONG.  Forcing you to put his sisters in the bridal party was…well, again wrong.  He sounds really controlling and not supportive at all.

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