Post # 1
I’m co-MOH for my mom’s upcoming wedding. Love her fiance, love the venue (tropical), love everything except her wedding dress. Her original vision was to have everyone wear white and she would wear a vibrant color (peach, coral, blue, aqua, etc.). I thought this vision was unique, awesome, and still totally bridal. She’s had trouble finding a dress and recently went to a shop by herself and ended up purchasing a gown with a very busy dark pattern that photographs poorly. In her view, the dress is flattering and gypsy-vibe, but through the camera lens some of the colors clash and the bead/sparkle detail also somewhat clashes. To me the dress vibe is more vegas/evening than vibrant tropical.
As co-MOH my job is to shut-up and be supportive, but I was hoping the message boards could provide a safe outlet to vent and share. I have not seen the dress in person yet since I live out of state and the store sales person took only one photo at an unflattering angle. Here is the model wearing the dress and I still find it to be a too-busy pattern with colors that clash. To my eye, this dress just photographs ugly. I’m hoping it’s better in real life.
Post # 2
So are you asking if you should tell her you don’t like it? What kind of relationship do you have with your mom? Personally I would never tell someone I didn’t like their wedding dress but my mom & I are really close so I wouldn’t think anything of telling her I didn’t care for the dress she chose. But that’s just how we are, we’re more honest with each other.
Post # 3
I wouldn’t say anything, and I get you’re just venting.
Personally I hate that dress. Maybe have some options that your mom might like better. Just in case. I personally find it to busy and a bit underwhelming.
Post # 4
We are close. I told her that I don’t love the photos (true), but I’ll trust her that “it looks good in real life”. 2nd part was a Maid/Matron of Honor white lie. She’s beautiful but sometimes has low self esteem so that’s why I’m not willing to go full honest with my negative opinion. Then again, I’m sure she noticed that I’m not gushing with emoticons and compliments which is what I normally do when she sends over wedding or shopping updates.
I’m also curious if other Bees find this dress ugly/unsuitable or if it’s just me.
Post # 5
If she likes it and it makes her feel pretty, then I don’t see what the problem is. She has probably questioned your tastes many times over the years and had the good sense to keep those feelings to herself. Time to return the favor.
Post # 6
- Wedding: September 2017 - Pearson Convention Centre
If she likes it and feels good in it I’m my opinion it’s not your place to tell her that you don’t like her dress. It’s her vision and her choice be supportive
Post # 7
Being outwardly supportive (check)…but do you guys personally think it looks good?
Post # 8
pearlbeemarried : I agree with you; the design is somewhat unfortunate, and for all its busy print, does not have much impact. If you think your mom is open to suggestions, you could maybe frame it in terms of knowing that she had trouble finding a dress, but there are options that would be really exquisite for such as important day. You could then suggest several alternatives. Since your mother was looking for colorful – and from what I gather – bold prints, what about these?
From StylesAfrikDesigns, an Etsy shop:
or from New York Dress:
Post # 9
pearlbeemarried : What you (her daughter) would pick and what she (your Mom) would pick to wear are probably a million miles apart. I think that dress is perfectly fine for a tropical wedding, and if she loves it and feels happy with her choice, I think the best you can do is support her in her decision. You might be surprised at how great she looks when she’s happy and excited and walking to her man.
Post # 10
Is that a dress or a jumpsuit? Maybe it’s just the photo but it looks like palazzo pants on the bottom. And something about the pattern seenms to draw attention to the crotch… at least in that photo.
Post # 11
Yeah I personally don’t like it at all. I think printed wedding dresses are awesome but this one reminds me of all the printed prom dresses that were popular when I was in high school (around 2008-2010).
Post # 12
I like the dress. As a wedding dress? Maybe not. But if it makes her feel confident and beautiful, that’s all that matters.
Post # 13
I like her dress but I can see it could be less flattering on a person. What about something like this? This looks bridal tropics and artsy to me- and flattering!
Post # 14
Lol, I can see the jumpsuit optical illusion, but I can confirm it’s really a dress. Here’s another photo.
Btw she is in great shape and has a killer bod (better than mine). Her Pinterest is 30+ pictures of peach boho dresses, most of them lace and none of them patterned. I believe that she was frustrated that she could not find any vibrant boho style dresses and landed with the first one she sort of liked instead of holding out for one she loved.
Post # 15
pearlbeemarried : it’s a difficult situation. Ultimately, if she really loves the dress, I wouldn’t be arguing the point with her. It’s her wedding.
But if, as you suspect, she just settled on the first dress she kind of liked, she may end up regretting it, let alone you, and then I think you’d be neglecting your duty not discussing it with her.
I’d first test out what she’s really feeling about it, along the lines of “I thought you wanted something tropical and bright, maybe even lacey – are you sure that is what you really want?”. Then if she’s absolutely gushing over it, let it go, but if she has doubts, talk them out with her. Even then, I wouldn’t say that you don’t like it, but more that you’re concerned she’ll end up regretting it and that it may not photograph very well.
For what it’s worth, I found some dresses at online stores (Promgirl, Newyorkdress and Bestbridalprices, which are all authorised resellers) that are somewhere between her original vision and what she ended up picking: