(Closed) don’t want any parties

posted 8 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
1854 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

I didn’t have any of those. A group of colleagues took us out for a nice, calm dinner, and that was it.

What helped, is that we chose to have no bridal party. Usually, it’s their role to organize these parties. People were, I guess expecting parties for us, but no one organized them so it didn’t happen.

If you do have a bridal party, you can tell them that you prefer to celebrate only the ceremony and a quiet reception after, and that this is your vision – their role is to help you achieve that.

Good luck!

Post # 4
Member
2398 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Congratualtions!

Given what you say above, have you considered eloping?  Or having a very intimate and at-home sort of celebration with just close friends and family?  Mrs. Maryjane did something like this, and it was lovely. 

Post # 5
Member
30 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I would have to say it’s not tacky or rude only because I was the exact same way when planning my wedding. The one thing I learned from planning was that you will never make everyone happy and weddings can bring out the ugly side of people. So you may receive some backlash about saying no thanks to any of the traditional wedding related events. 

My husband and I felt very strongly about only doing things we wanted. Your wedding is the one time you can really get away with being selfish. 😉

We did not have any engagement parties, no bridal showers, no registries, we asked our families to let families and friends know we did not want any gifts (even though we still got plenty), we didn’t have any bachelor/bachelorette parties, no rehearsal dinner, and our wedding consisted of 21 guests – short ceremony with dinner following – no dancing (not really our thing, but a good meal with close friends and family was ideal). Looking back, we both agree we wouldn’t have done anything differently. We loved it! Everyone else seems to have the same cookie-cutter wedding so it was fun to do something different and break the mold. We did get a lot of disappointed reactions to our plans, but whatever. It was our day, not theirs. 

Good luck with your planning. Just let those closest to you know that you and your future husband are not comfortable with certain things. My parents were very supportive of us doing things differently. My Mother-In-Law not so much, but we just kept saying “no” very nicely. We were pretty much a broken record for 10 months, but it all worked out in the end.

 

Post # 7
Member
4567 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I’m the exact same way, except I want a rehersal dinner/ welcome party for our out of town guests. No showers, DEFININTELY not a bachelorette (ugh…)… maybe just a dinner with my friends at the absolute MOST. But nothing crazy or wild. I’m just not that person, I’m not the biggest fan of having events thrown for me (what if no one shows up?!) and generally just anti-hoopla! I don’t think there’s a thing wrong with that.

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