Post # 1
I had talked to a DJ for the wedding (no deposit yet) but it’s pretty close to being a set done deal. Tonight I had 2 friends come talk to me about allowing them to DJ at our wedding. I assumed they would want to relax and enjoy the night *and I said that to them* they said music is what they live to do it is their relaxation and they really wanted to do the wedding. I felt my heart just drop. I tried to keep explaining why they (don’t) want to do this as it’s not just friends but also family and we’d then need an MC and they came back with answers to everything I said. They seem hurt I didn’t ask them first and even more hurt I’m paying someone else when they are also professional and would do it for free. I don’t know what to do.
Post # 3
@HappilyEverAfter54: Ugh, that’s a sticky spot (especially since they’re so persistant). I’d call them/visit them in a few days, or if they bring it up again, I’d mention that you’re just not comfortable using friendors (if you’re not using them in other places like cake/photog, etc).
I’ve had to just politely say that I just want them to have the most fun possible, and I want to be able to enjoy spending a little down time with them, not having them work or have responsibilities. I also wouldn’t want to compromise a friendship due to a mishap or a difference of opinion on the big day where I’ll likely be a bit stressed. A vendor can complain about me with co-workers the next day, or I can request/demand money back from a DJ’s whose speakers bust or doesn’t perform up to contract, but Thanksgiving or the next NYE party won’t be strained. Most people understood that, and even if they were still a little disappointed they were nice about it and we all moved on.
I hope it goes well. It’s always a bummer to be put in a situation like that.
Post # 4
@indibee: THANK YOU! You made some really good points I didn’t think to bring up and I’m not using any friendors after having one back out and getting scared a few months ago. I trust them but I don’t want to hurt friendships or cause them any drama. I will definitely send them both a message to meet up for some drinks and words. I think that’ll help just to let them know again I want to enjoy their company on the dance floor rather than behind the table. =)