(Closed) Dont want to invite FI sister

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
5921 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

I have to say that I’d invite her. 

Post # 4
Member
2474 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I think you should let your Fiance decide whether he wants to invite her and respect whatever decision he makes – I mean – it’s his sister, regardless of whether they are in close contact.

Post # 5
Member
7152 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

I think you should invite her. If she doesn’t show up, at least you invited her.

Post # 6
Member
2015 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

For me, when it comes to immediate family, they’re always invited. It would be a HUGE diss if she weren’t. That’s not just etiquette, that’s just being nice to your family.

My husband has a sister that we never see. She’s not on good terms with his entire family, and with us (I’ve nver even met her). he never talks to her, and we invited her. She didn’t come, though.

Post # 7
Member
300 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I agree with PrncssDva. I think you should invite her (ONLY if that’s what your Fiance wants. It’s his sister) and then the ball is in her court.

Post # 8
Member
162 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I think you should invite her too.  There’s a difference between siblings being “not close” and being actually estranged.  If you still have family events together, it could make things awkward if she’s the only member not invited.

If you don’t want to deal with the out-of-control kid, don’t invite him (that would really only have a shot of working if you’re not inviting any children though).

 

Post # 9
Member
5670 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

Unfortunately I think you need to invite her. If she comes it is up to her, but she should at least be invited.

Post # 11
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: January 2011

You should invite her. You don’t need to invite her child (if you aren’t having other children there).

If your Fiance wants to include her, for whatever reason, you should respect his feelings on that. I don’t think it matters that she is his half sibling. It matters that your Fiance has decided that he wants her there, because she’s his sister, even if the two are not close.

The additional bad blood you risk creating by not inviting her isn’t really worth excluding her, IMO.

Post # 12
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I wouldn’t invite her. You can always pull the “it was a really smal wedding” card. Unless, of course, your Fiance wants her there to avoid drama.

Post # 13
Member
1042 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I have to say invite her. I totally dislike my Future Sister-In-Law and I am inviting her to appease the family…

Post # 14
Member
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2009

Invite her.

Post # 15
Member
354 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Invite who you want, but I agree with gingerbride – not inviting her could create some bad blood in your FI’s family. Only you and your Fiance know your particular situation, but it does sound like she attends his family’s other family functions, which could be really awkward in the future if you don’t invite her. Will your FI’s parents be hurt if you exclude her? Are you having an adults only reception? If so, you could invite her but not her out of control son, and maybe she’ll choose not to come if he’s not invited. If you guys aren’t close at all, chances are she won’t come to your wedding anyway, and if she does rsvp yes, maybe it’s because she wants to be more involved in your lives, which could be a positive thing. Good luck with your decision!

Post # 16
Member
447 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

You don’t HAVE to invite her… but are you prepared for you and your fiance to never speak to her again?  That’s what you’d be setting yourselves up for.  Maybe that’s what the two of you want, but don’t take it lightly.

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