(Closed) Don’t want to show FH my dress choices, but am nearing the end of my rope…

posted 10 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
Member
72 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2008

I’m wearing a similar dress (strapless, lace, slim a-line), and i got a lace-edged veil from headpieceheaven.com .  It has a 1" lace trim for most of the veil, and then goes to a 3" lace trim near the bottom (it’s a waltz length).

 

GL! 

Post # 4
Member
291 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

A simple (ie. no extra embellishments) silk tulle chapel-length veil might be really striking and goregous on you and with the dress. Your dress is already beautiful and covered in lace so something that just has that length and volume would be like, WOW and not adding more busyness. I’m so not a long veil girl but I did try on VW’s chapel length runway veil with my dress and it’s just such a fabulous punch. It would also be really romantic imo and you can do those cool veil flowing in the wind pics!

Post # 6
Member
735 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2009

why wouldn’t he like the dress?  Its so freakin cute!

 

Post # 7
Member
80 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Well, if you’re really worried about the dress, look for a few other all lace dresses. I decided on mine after trying on a million other dresses with lace. But I knew that mine was it and I had my fiance there. He loved it.

I’m not sure what your budget is but it looks like the Dessy one is expensive as it is. Consider that David’s Bridal has 2 spectacular all lace ones and Marisa gowns also have all lace and are really great looking. Pronovias and Anjolique also have some beautiful gowns. 

Don’t rush into anything…take your time and it will happen. You’ll love it so much you won’t want to take it off. 

Post # 9
Member
228 posts
Helper bee

"I’m still nervous about making the right choice, because, I mean, this is THE dress of my life and all…eek…"

 Relax!  The dresses you picked are all wonderful, and I’m sure your fiance will love whatever you are wearing.  Most guys won’t notice anything but the fact that it’s white anyway =P  If he really had a strong opinion about he does or doesn’t want you to wear, wouldn’t he have said something already? =)

 Besides, it’s not THE dress, it’s just a dress.  A special dress, but it’s still just a dress for one day =)  The important thing is that you’ll be getting married!

Post # 10
Member
117 posts
Blushing bee

first, the dress you chose is beautiful.  second, if you’re really not sure whether your Fiance will like it, do this.  show him a few pictures of different styles of dresses, (including something SIMILAR to the one you’ve decided on, something similar to other styles you’re contemplating and just some other random styles).  Ask him his opinion on all of them.  What EXACTLY he likes and dislikes about each one.  this will give you a better idea about what he likes without completely ruining the surprise.

Post # 11
Member
735 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2009

He’s not the one trying on dresses!

Go for what your gut tells you but if worse comes to worse, do what MissEsg suggested 

Post # 13
Member
291 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

You’re going to look beautiful, no matter what you’re wearing!! Trust me, when your FH sees you, he’s not going to be thinking about the material your dress is made of :p, he’s going to be thinking, "Wow, that’s my wife."

Keep it in perspective and don’t stress too much :)…have fun with it!!

Post # 14
Member
2324 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

I think that Watters dress looks like what it is…a bridesmaid dress. It’s not all the special and it doesn’t look very bride like to me. Go for what you like…he’ll just be happy to marry you and he probably won’t even notice what you are wearing!

Post # 15
Member
244 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2008

If i had listened to my groom and what he thought he wanted in a dress I would have ended up in a ballgown.  Why? Cause that’s mostly what he’d seen on t.v.,movies, etc. and for him he associated big ballgown with "wedding." Anytime I showed him something more streamlined he’d say "it’s not very bridal/looks like a cocktail dress/looks like a nightgown."  But big ballgown wasn’t me style wise, isn’t flattering on me, and wouldn’t have fit our venue.  So I chose the dress that looked best on me and that I felt the best in and he loved it…and I got a million compliments on how great the dress was.

Guys don’t know wedding dresses. You can ask what they like and they will tell you something based on their limited knowledge, but that’s cause they have no idea the range of choices out there.  Plus they have no idea what looks good on your body.

My guess is he used his cultural background (fine silks are highly valued in South Asian culture, and silk is soft to the touch ) to answer your question about what type of wedding  dress he would like …which is why he wanted "something silky."  I doubt his heart is set on it.

 You will be a beautiful bride and that’s all that he’s going to see.

Post # 16
Member
106 posts
Blushing bee

I am sure you dress yourself without input from him every day…..and I bet he loves the way you look every time he sees you!  Your wedding day will be no different.  (Well, it will be different, but only because he will be MORE inclined than usual to love the way you look.)  The misty Himalayas, with candlelight and a smiling bride with a bouquet and a long, lacy dress?  How could anyone not love it?

Have you tried on the Dessy?  Did you take a friend or family member along?  Sometimes a reassuring voice from someone you know who’s got your back can go a long way.  Try it on again if you need to; try on enough dresses to feel confident in your decision.  Or, just go with the Dessy and fret no more….it’s lovely. 

I’m sure you will look back at your wedding pictures one day and wonder why you worried.  🙂

I thought about asking my fiance to vote on dress options, but didn’t do it, b/c he wouldn’t have had an opinion and would have had to "manufacture" an opinion, which I then would’ve given too much weight to. 

I did take my mom along on all my shopping excursions….she has years of experience in knowing what looks best on me!  Even with her help, I still worried about it.  I ended up with a great dress, but I didn’t recognize as great until the wedding day….I worried so much that I actually bought an extra dress at David’s _the day before the wedding_!  Paid for last-minute alterations and all.  But I was worried for nothing — seeing the dress in the right context makes all the difference.  My dress was this one, worn without the sash:  http://www.davidsbridal.com/bridal_gowns_detail.jsp?stid=3357&prodgroup=127′ defer=’defer

For a veil, I’d think the Dessy would look pretty with a long one — at least fingertip, or possibly waltz, chapel, or cathedral.  I wore a long veil (extending just past the length of the train) w/ a lace edge only at the bottom; got it online at Occansey.

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