Post # 1
So this post started as a search for the right veil to go with the dress I think I want, and while I’d still really appreciate any suggestions, I’m exhausted, have tried at a ton of gowns, and don’t think I’m any closer to knowing what I should wear on the big day. I’m really close to just showing FH my options and telling him to pick, because I’m completley nervous as to whether he’ll be happy with what I’d choose on my own or not. I DO NOT want to do this, but I’m not sure what my other options are at this point. Any advice or moral support would be great.
original post in brackets:
I think I’ve FINALLY decided on a gown, thanks to everyone’s input (and a little help from the old gut feeling). I’m still nervous about making the right choice, because, I mean, this is THE dress of my life and all…eek…I just want my whole look to be perfect on our wedding day! I’m hoping my sureness factor will be amped up by finding the right veil.
You can see the dress @ http://www.dessy.com/dresses/wedding/1016/ and there are pictures of me and our location @ http://bamboo-bride.blogspot.com. Maybe you’ll be inspired as to what veil look is right for the dress, the location AND my face. Lol. Our Catholic wedding is going to be outdoors (in a little Himalayan town in India) and in my opinion the venue is relativley informal, although we will be sprucing it up to create our desired romantic ambiance (think white roses and hopefully bajillions of candles).
I really like mantilla veils or ones with some lacey-not sparkly-trim, and don’t plan to wear it over my head or face. I think I’ll most likely have an updo with the veil flowing down from under my hair. I really like the look of a veil draping over my bare shoulders, so the length should to allow for that.
Then again, I am open to TOTALLY DIFFERENT IDEAS too!
Anyways, any suggestions on appropriate veils or hairdos for me and my dress-to-be would be marvelous! If you have or know of any pictures of brides who wore a similarly simple dress I would looove to see them!]
Post # 3
I’m wearing a similar dress (strapless, lace, slim a-line), and i got a lace-edged veil from headpieceheaven.com . It has a 1" lace trim for most of the veil, and then goes to a 3" lace trim near the bottom (it’s a waltz length).
Post # 4
A simple (ie. no extra embellishments) silk tulle chapel-length veil might be really striking and goregous on you and with the dress. Your dress is already beautiful and covered in lace so something that just has that length and volume would be like, WOW and not adding more busyness. I’m so not a long veil girl but I did try on VW’s chapel length runway veil with my dress and it’s just such a fabulous punch. It would also be really romantic imo and you can do those cool veil flowing in the wind pics!
Post # 5
Aww…veil blowing in the wind. I like the sound of that. It’s calming and sweet…which I need right now. I’m literally FREAKING OUT about picking the right dress. I mean, I like the Dessy I gave the link to above, but I’m so nervous my fiancee won’t like it. I’ve tried on a ton of dresses and feel like I’m not any closer to knowing what’s going to be REALLY perfect for the big day. Dang it, dang it.
I’m in panic mode and am getting sooo close to doing the unthinkable: showing FH the dresses I’ve considered and just asking him to pick. I really don’t want to do it, but I’m nearing the end of my rope. Uggh. What to do, what to do…
Post # 6
why wouldn’t he like the dress? Its so freakin cute!
Post # 7
Well, if you’re really worried about the dress, look for a few other all lace dresses. I decided on mine after trying on a million other dresses with lace. But I knew that mine was it and I had my fiance there. He loved it.
I’m not sure what your budget is but it looks like the Dessy one is expensive as it is. Consider that David’s Bridal has 2 spectacular all lace ones and Marisa gowns also have all lace and are really great looking. Pronovias and Anjolique also have some beautiful gowns.
Don’t rush into anything…take your time and it will happen. You’ll love it so much you won’t want to take it off.
Post # 8
He says he wants something silky, but I just don’t know about it. I thought of getting this Watters bridesmaid dress (http://watters.com/product.php?coll=watters&style=5433) in white with extra length to have it cut for a sweep train, because I think he’d like it. I just don’t like it as much, though.
Post # 9
"I’m still nervous about making the right choice, because, I mean, this is THE dress of my life and all…eek…"
Relax! The dresses you picked are all wonderful, and I’m sure your fiance will love whatever you are wearing. Most guys won’t notice anything but the fact that it’s white anyway =P If he really had a strong opinion about he does or doesn’t want you to wear, wouldn’t he have said something already? =)
Besides, it’s not THE dress, it’s just a dress. A special dress, but it’s still just a dress for one day =) The important thing is that you’ll be getting married!
Post # 10
first, the dress you chose is beautiful. second, if you’re really not sure whether your Fiance will like it, do this. show him a few pictures of different styles of dresses, (including something SIMILAR to the one you’ve decided on, something similar to other styles you’re contemplating and just some other random styles). Ask him his opinion on all of them. What EXACTLY he likes and dislikes about each one. this will give you a better idea about what he likes without completely ruining the surprise.
Post # 11
He’s not the one trying on dresses!
Go for what your gut tells you but if worse comes to worse, do what MissEsg suggested
Post # 12
Thanks all for the support! As far as prices go on the gowns, I fell in love with not one but two Manuel Motas that were WAY out of the price range ($2000+) since Pronovias is very expensive. Dessy or the Watters bridesmaid dress options, on the other hand, are very budget friendly.
Peihan, I love you. Just a month ago I was saying the exact same thing: "it’s just A dress." Thanks for bringing me back to center. Really, the most important thing to me is that we’re celebrating the beginning of our lives as husband and wife together and that me + dress = breathtaking as I walk down the isle. I’m sure as far as he’s concerned, I could be sporting my favorite pair of jeans and a tee.
But…that’s a last resort! If you’ve got anymore advice or dress (Dessy or Watters) and veil opinions, check the blog (http://bamboo-bride.blogspot.com) for pics of me, FH and our venue and do share!
Now it’s time for a cup of tea to calm the frazzled nerves and hope for more helpful responses!
Post # 13
You’re going to look beautiful, no matter what you’re wearing!! Trust me, when your FH sees you, he’s not going to be thinking about the material your dress is made of :p, he’s going to be thinking, "Wow, that’s my wife."
Keep it in perspective and don’t stress too much :)…have fun with it!!
Post # 14
I think that Watters dress looks like what it is…a bridesmaid dress. It’s not all the special and it doesn’t look very bride like to me. Go for what you like…he’ll just be happy to marry you and he probably won’t even notice what you are wearing!
Post # 15
If i had listened to my groom and what he thought he wanted in a dress I would have ended up in a ballgown. Why? Cause that’s mostly what he’d seen on t.v.,movies, etc. and for him he associated big ballgown with "wedding." Anytime I showed him something more streamlined he’d say "it’s not very bridal/looks like a cocktail dress/looks like a nightgown." But big ballgown wasn’t me style wise, isn’t flattering on me, and wouldn’t have fit our venue. So I chose the dress that looked best on me and that I felt the best in and he loved it…and I got a million compliments on how great the dress was.
Guys don’t know wedding dresses. You can ask what they like and they will tell you something based on their limited knowledge, but that’s cause they have no idea the range of choices out there. Plus they have no idea what looks good on your body.
My guess is he used his cultural background (fine silks are highly valued in South Asian culture, and silk is soft to the touch ) to answer your question about what type of wedding dress he would like …which is why he wanted "something silky." I doubt his heart is set on it.
You will be a beautiful bride and that’s all that he’s going to see.
Post # 16
I am sure you dress yourself without input from him every day…..and I bet he loves the way you look every time he sees you! Your wedding day will be no different. (Well, it will be different, but only because he will be MORE inclined than usual to love the way you look.) The misty Himalayas, with candlelight and a smiling bride with a bouquet and a long, lacy dress? How could anyone not love it?
Have you tried on the Dessy? Did you take a friend or family member along? Sometimes a reassuring voice from someone you know who’s got your back can go a long way. Try it on again if you need to; try on enough dresses to feel confident in your decision. Or, just go with the Dessy and fret no more….it’s lovely.
I’m sure you will look back at your wedding pictures one day and wonder why you worried. 🙂
I thought about asking my fiance to vote on dress options, but didn’t do it, b/c he wouldn’t have had an opinion and would have had to "manufacture" an opinion, which I then would’ve given too much weight to.
I did take my mom along on all my shopping excursions….she has years of experience in knowing what looks best on me! Even with her help, I still worried about it. I ended up with a great dress, but I didn’t recognize as great until the wedding day….I worried so much that I actually bought an extra dress at David’s _the day before the wedding_! Paid for last-minute alterations and all. But I was worried for nothing — seeing the dress in the right context makes all the difference. My dress was this one, worn without the sash: http://www.davidsbridal.com/bridal_gowns_detail.jsp?stid=3357&prodgroup=127′ defer=’defer
For a veil, I’d think the Dessy would look pretty with a long one — at least fingertip, or possibly waltz, chapel, or cathedral. I wore a long veil (extending just past the length of the train) w/ a lace edge only at the bottom; got it online at Occansey.