(Closed) Don’t want to start trouble with In-Laws

posted 9 months ago in Relationships
Post # 16
Member
1015 posts
Bumble bee

I would want to please my husband over my SIL. 

Don’t feel guilt. Just have a great evening together.

By The Way if I was the niece, I would probably love a special afternoon or evening out with the two of you later! 

 

Post # 17
Member
8999 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

otterbee :  I am not saying your SIL isn’t overdramatic but the fact that both your Mother-In-Law and SIL declined your invitation leads me to believe that your niece’s party was already in the works when you invited them but just hadn’t been set in stone at that point. So I think it is overdramatic to think she set the party on this date due to you and not for the million other reasons that can go into planning a birthday party like grandparent availability. It would have been nice if they gave you a heads up though but there could have been a reason for that (like you thinking that it was a play to get you which you are currently doing).

Make a decision together and stick to it. If you don’t want to handle the flack for missing the party then don’t miss the party but do you want to live your life like that?

 

Post # 18
Member
924 posts
Busy bee

Definitely don’t cancel your plans. “Thanks for the invite but we won’t be able to make it to little Samantha’s birthday party, we have a conflict that day.” Honestly if a kid’s birthday party causes a blowout, then they are crazy pants and that’s totally on them.

Post # 19
Member
617 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

OP, your Darling Husband is going out of his way to celebrate your birthday and plan a surprise for you–let him pamper you! You have a wonderful husband.

The family is his, let him deal with them. If he says it’ll be ok, believe him. 

Your ILs expect you to skip work to attend a child’s birthday? That is way over the top cray cray.

Post # 21
Member
1039 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

otterbee :  Great update! Your husband sounds lovely.

Mine is also working on boundaries with his family, and it’s really hard as the partner in the situation to know how to handle things sometimes! I’ve decided to be supportive of what he wants to do, give him my opinion when he asks for it, and help him think through the options in a given situation. If they do/say something to me directly, I’ve already decided ahead of time what my own limits are of what I can ignore and what I can’t let go.

Post # 22
Member
2580 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2018

mrsptobe2017 :  “Your husband sounds lovely”.

You must have missed the post about his anger & punching issues including a near miss with a kitten!!!

Post # 23
Member
200 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2019

I’d still go and just cancel their two tickets or take a coupe of friends! Have fun! It’s your celebration that you planned first!

Post # 24
Member
950 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969 - City, State

I think you have the wrong bee… wasn’t that minigogo or something along those lines… ?  mrsaime :  

Post # 25
Member
2580 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2018

leembee :  Yep! She has 3 accounts!!!! This is the third she opened when people figured out her other two were the same as well. 

Post # 26
Member
950 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969 - City, State

 

mrsaime :  Ugh 😞.  Gotcha.  I knew she had opened a second.  

Post # 27
Hostess
9545 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - Chicago, IL

Closing for review 

The topic ‘Don’t want to start trouble with In-Laws’ is closed to new replies.

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