(Closed) Doom and Gloom from in-laws

posted 7 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
457 posts
Helper bee

We did as well. I think family dynamics plays a lot into that. My baby will be the second of my parents grandbaby but they are just as excited and overjoyed. Darling Husband and I are very close with my family and overall my family is super involved with each other and we give each other such love and support that it’s a great feeling.

However, Darling Husband family is sooo not like that. This will be THEIR first and the excitment is just not there. Granted we don’t speak with Mother-In-Law or SIL but we do have a relationship with Darling Husband father and family as well as Darling Husband granma and aunts and uncles, and none of them reacted the way my family did nor do they even ask any questions about the baby. Darling Husband and I have to bring up the baby to even talk about it, my Father-In-Law will at times ask how I am feeling but that’s about it. Doesn’t engage in baby name convos or care about what we are planning and doing with the baby. It’s tough at times to see the change between my famil and his but I know a lot of it just plays into different familes and how they act. 

 

Post # 4
Member
1004 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

We got the same reaction from Hubby’s parents. He has never had a real relationship with them. It’s been over 3 months and he still hasn’t heard from his mom. His dad did call once shortly after we found out we were having a boy and all he said was, that’s nice.

My parents are super excited. Hubby’s grandma is super excited as well.

Post # 6
Member
5823 posts
Bee Keeper

Not from family, but when I was 9 months pregnant a coworker said basically the same thing.  “I can’t believe you’ve chosen to bring a child into this world, with all the war and hunger and poverty.  I just could never do that to another human being.”  Hey b****, thanks for saying that when I’m about to pop!  I wasn’t really sad, just offended and angry because 1) what could I POSSIBLY do about it now and 2) guilt tripping a pregnant lady??  WHY?

Post # 7
Member
2201 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

@MightySapphire: Wow – I would have been tempted to tell that coworker “Huh, I didn’t think of that. I wonder if I can return this one . . .”

Post # 8
Member
1004 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@MightySapphire: I probably would have had to have said something really mean like she should have been the stain on her parents’ bed then if she felt that way about war, poverty and hunger. 

Post # 9
Member
2829 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

i think it could be partially that to other people, the baby isn’t quite ‘real’ until it’s kicking and screaming.

My dad didn’t say a single word at all when I told him I was pregnant. He just kind of looked at me and walked away. Which was ridiculous because he and I are super close. For a long time I thought he was mad or disappointed. He didn’t say a single thing about the baby when I was pregnant, it was almost as if he was pretending I wasn’t.

When my son was born, my very first visitor was my dad & he was all smiles and wonderful grandfatherly adoration. It was weird, but awesome in the end.

Some people are assholes, and some people are just weird. Lets hope your inlaws change their tune when the LO arrives 🙂

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