(Closed) Downgrading a ring? Did my fiancé spend too much ?

posted 5 years ago in Rings
Post # 61
1842 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

I’m sorry, but I have to agree with some PPs who think your fiancé was overcharged. Mine paid $6000 (appraised for around $9000) for a Tacori band and a .9 carat SI2, I color, excellent cut, GIA certified diamond. Yes, the size and color is lower than yours, but there are no visible inclusions. For $10000 I don’t think you should have any visible inclusions!

Who is the designer of your band? A big name? Where did he buy it? Even if it was a Tiffany I would think you’d have an eye-clean stone if you’re paying that much. Beautiful ring! But not worth $10000 in my eyes (with inclusions. Without those and a perfect diamond, sure). 

Secondly, I agree it’s sometimes hard to wear something that is that expensive. That’s not to say that I don’t LOVE my ring because I absolutely do! It’s just so one-sided. He saves and spends the money, but gets little benefit from it. We get all the benefit for minimal sacrifice.

Post # 62
454 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I would freak out if I had a ring that expensive mostly bc I’d be worried about losing it lol 

Post # 63
2921 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 1996

Berri:  Whoa. Take a deep breath. If someone points out that you used a racial slur, the appropriate response is to apologize and move on, keeping it in mind for the future. That is how a mature, reasonable adult behaves. Sometimes we don’t realize where a word comes from or that others find it offensive — no one is perfect, and that’s okay — but it’s NOT okay to get all defensive and accuse the other party of being too easily offended.

Post # 64
96 posts
Worker bee

[post moderated for snark]

Post # 65
60 posts
Worker bee

Fknpug:  I am .000424% the “banana” people, don’t you dare say anything about this fruit!!

Post # 66
2255 posts
Buzzing bee

Berri:  I *am* part of the ethnic group. I said a ‘hint’ because it’s three generations back and I’m otherwise Irish. How little or much is in my blood doesn’t negate the fact that it’s there. It also doesn’t mean I have any less right to be offended by it. I didn’t realize I had to prove what’s in my blood in order to point that out.

No need to be an all-out bitch to me. I wasn’t one to you in any way. 

The attitude in these responses is deplorable. Believe me, I get that you see no problem with the term. You think it’s a joke and I’m being a butthurt little Bee because you don’t perceive it as wrong. But it is. All I did in my original post was point that out. That’s it. Nothing more. 

I really wonder if someone had used a term that was a slur to a different ethnic group and someone pointed, if you would have responded to them in the same way you have me. I sincerely hope not.


  • This reply was modified 4 years, 6 months ago by  MrsYokiman.
Post # 67
3169 posts
Sugar bee

MrsYokiman:  You don’t need to justify yourself for taking the time to point out that word is a slur because you don’t have to be part of a group of people to be offended by inappropriate words. I don’t identify as gay but I don’t like homophobic slurs, for example. And also thanks for pointing out where that word was derived from! I don’t use it but had never made the connection. 

Post # 68
13563 posts
Honey Beekeeper

This thread has unfortunately gone pretty far south, so we’re going to close it now.

The topic ‘Downgrading a ring? Did my fiancé spend too much ?’ is closed to new replies.

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