- Miss Moxy
- 3 years ago
- Wedding: September 2013
You’re in for one drama filled ride…so sit tight, maybe get yourself a little wine, cause this is a long one.
Almost 5 years ago, I got married. Before I got married, I did like any other bride would do and made the longest invite list ever created with people that I rarely see, but somehow someone convinced me they were a must on the invite list. I ended up keeping my list of attendees at 105 (Im a pretty introverted person), knowing that some wouldnt be able to come. That was alright with me because I am not a rich woman and a big event is daunting. Anyway, my fiance’s (now husband) younger brother was dating a girl for maybe 3 months at most and for some reason, she HAD to be at my wedding. I had made a hard rule that anyone dating, had to be doing so for over a year for invite…but my husband’s sisters basically pushed me and my now husband to invite this girl to my wedding. Both of us had never met her. The first time I had ever met her was at my bridal shower, where she did little to socialize and left early. Fast forward to my rehearsal dinner. I was missing a groomsman, low and behold, it was my husband’s younger brother. Apparently, his girlfriend HAD to come to the rehearsal dinner but couldnt get out of work early enough to attend the ACTUAL rehearsal, so they both arrived in time for food.
Then, my wedding day arrived. This girl made stabbing gestures at my friend (a bridesmaid) who was walking down the aisle with her boyfriend, the younger brother. After the reception, she got drunk…extremely drunk. Her drunken night Activities included: Grabbing my younger brother in law’s crotch, sitting spread eagle at the elevated bridal party table for everyone to see her panties, threatening to jump into the river near the venue for a swim, crying in the bathroom over something her daddy wouldnt buy her and telling my Mother-In-Law how she wants to be a stripper. Because she was so drunk, my Brother-In-Law, Mother-In-Law and Father-In-Law all left early to take care of this child.
My husband’s other brother got married a year and half later to a lady I now call one of my best friends (BFFSIL). At their wedding, this girl got drunk AGAIN, she made a scene in front of my BFFSIL’s pastor, said some obscene things at the wedding to BFFSIL’s family members, started making out with another girl at the wedding and threw up in the parking lot. She never apologized to any of us.
Then our true falling out happened. She started posting some seriously offensive stuff on facebook, stuff that I found were aimed towards my demographic especially. I decided to keep it civil and to unfriend her so I could just keep that negativity out of my life (this was before the unfollow feature became a thing). Well, being the social media addict and the socialite she is, she noticed right away and got PISSED. She went to my Mother-In-Law and made it sound like I wasnt talking to her out of jealousy (she’s sterotypically pretty). Well now I was upset-She was stirring up drama and I just wasnt having it….so I ignored her at all family functions.
But she was still talking to my BFFSIL at the time…and well, she told her some private stuff that I will never divulge, but also let out that if she got engaged to my husband’s younger brother she would never invite me to the wedding. At that time I was upset, my husband and his younger brother had an ok relationship. Now, not so much. Well, I thought after a year it was enough with the gossiping and blatant stoicism, I invited her and my husband’s younger brother to events we were hosting. They declined EVERY SINGLE ONE for over a year. They finally came to one event, and they basically pulled apart from the group to do their own thing. So when that last invite didnt work to get everyone talking, my BFFSIL took it upon herself to try to help us rectify this chasm. We tried lunch dates, breakfast, beach dates…she declined them all. My BFFSIL decided to do a Christmas party at her apartment, because who doesnt feel obligated to go to a family Xmas party? lol. At Thanksgiving, my husband’s younger brother and his girlfriend gave my BFFSIL the gift of a declined invitation, after they had promised months in advance to attend. She was livid and she’s not one to shy away from confrontation. She sent both my brother in law and his girlfriend a text about their behavior lately…and what she got back was basically a middle finger in the form of a text. #endoffriendship
A few months later, my BFFSIL and her husband, my only true Brother-In-Law, were asking for assistance to make a BIG purchase. My husband and I were glad to help. Shockingly, so was my husband’s youngest brother (fiance to this girl). BUT when this girl heard that her fiance was forking over money, she started complaining about it on social media. She pissed off one of her biggest defender, my husband’s older brother.
And my husband’s younger brother’s (girl’s fiance) stance on all of this? He blames us. He doesnt care. He doesn’t want to rectify a thing. He wants to be a Thanksgiving/4th of July brother…because thats what he thinks grown people do: pull away from family.
Well, the wedding is in a little over a year, near my birthday. My husband and his older brother are groomsmen…we think? I am (90%) decidedly not going. My husband is 100% ok with that now, but I am afraid the closer this wedding comes the more likely he will push me to attend. He isnt having the greatest relationship with his family right now so, as we see it, there arent many consequences for my actions. Even my husband is “retaliating”; he wont be present for any of the pre wedding functions. MY BFFSIL, is going for payback. She wants to drink the liqour, eat all the food and talk shit about this girl at the wedding. She really wants me to go and join in on the payback party but Im pretty sure I wont be comfortable enough to join in. I will probably get shit for not attending from my Mother-In-Law (who would spread rumours about me and my biological sister to my inlaws), from my husband’s 2 sisters who just want to give me crap to give me crap…and from my Father-In-Law who totally looks down on me (whether it be because of my my job or my politics or other things I cant control).
And what do my in laws think of her? Well, they chalk all this up to immaturity. If they keep making that an excuse she will take it, everytime. And its he same exucse time after time with no one telling its time to grow up.
So what would you do? Would you go to the wedding? Would you go to the other wedding events too?