(Closed) Drama might have ruined everything….

posted 11 years ago in Emotional
Post # 17
Member
262 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Hi Aimee,

First off, what she said and did is WAAAACKY!  This didn’t happen because of anything you did, she likely had these feelings for a while and the David’s Bridal thing just made it explode.  So I hope this starts to feel better soon and don’t call off your wedding!  Just keep plugging along and enjoy the presence of your loved ones thata re able to sit with you through all this. 

Second, I want to share a few things about mental health issues with you, which can relate to post partum depression also:

  • Don’t expect rational and understandable behavior from someone with a diagnosed mental health issue.
  • A helpful medication and treatment regimen can sometimes take a very long time to be established.  Depression is usually best treated by a combination of therapy AND meds.  Also, depression medication can take at least a month to begin to take effect and then there is the question of dosage, how the med interacts with that person, etc.
  • Have compassion for people suffering in this way.  Look how crazy her life is and what crazy making she’s done.  Imagine how she is suffering. And her baby… oh it is sad. 

As for you, be REALLY clear with yourself about the space you need and the time you need.  Be firm in setting your limits.  This isn’t going to get better right away.  Your mom did well by setting a limit with your friend.  Maybe next time she can give your friend some names of community resources for mental healthcare.  It isn’t appropriate for her to be talking to your family about you in this way. 

Unplug for a bit.  Try to stop checking myspace and facebook to see her craziness.  This kind of cyber drama can be very harmful, if you guys decide to resume friendship or to do anything later on down the road, do it face to face.  Don’t feed into this cyver drama and give yourself space.  She isn’t well and you are.  Give thanks for your health and hope that she gets better.  In My Humble Opinion, It is really the best that you can do here. 

 

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