- 3 years ago
- Wedding: September 2015
Hey bees- kind of a story/question here. its long. I apologize in advance lol.
I guess I don’t really know how to start it off completely but, I’ll just start. Fi and I got engaged the beginning of April. We welcomed a daughter in January. We’ve been together officially for a year at the end of this past April. We were exclusive FWB and lived together for 3 years before (he didn’t want a label idk he’s weird lol. ) anyways, that’s us.
Fi’s brother got engaged like around the beginning of December. They told his parents when they all traveled down to our house for our (my) baby shower. Fi’s brother is about 25 now, 24 at the time his fiancé just turned 21. They have been together one year, just this past march. So, they set a date for April, 2015. By the time they set the date Fi and I already knew when we wanted to get married (September/October 2015) I preferably wanted to be married by the time our daughter was 2.
Anyways, Easter came and we all got together and i had previously reached out to brothers Fi FSIL to make sure she wouldn’t be bothered by our timeline and hoped it was okay and wanted her thoughts just to be polite. She never responded or even aknowledged that I said anything to her. I kinda got the feeling maybe she was upset (for what reason I didn’t really know it would have been 5 months after their wedding, maybe bc she’s young I’m not sure.) anyways, we met for Easter I showed the picture of my ring to out of state family and we sort of did some wedding talk. I announced when we were looking for dates. By the time we already booked our venue and she (FSIL) and gave her Fi (my Fi’s brother) a look. Things seemed to be good though, we did a bunch of wedding talk. I didn’t talk to much about our wedding bc I wanted it to be about her, she showed her dress and talked about a potential venue they liked etc.
Sometime between then and August. I want to say around may/June Fi and I found out their wedding had been put on hold by her parents. She told FMIL it was because they’re young and want to focus on getting their lives a little bit more together. (They currently live with a few other people as all room mates, and haven’t lived on their own or have their own things to my knowledge). However I guess the real reason is her parents said he basically needs to have a good enough job to support the both of them so she wouldn’t have to work if she didn’t want to (personally I think that’s very wrong and not even logical in today’s economy.)
Well Fi’s sister (FSIL 2) went to see them at some point and she (FSIL) told FSIL2 she thought it was RUDE of Fi and I to plan our wedding five months after theirs because it would be less money Fi’s parents could put towards their wedding. I was stunned. I couldn’t believe that was the reason of all reasons. If anything I thought maybe it was a time thing. I don’t know. So now of course, if I would’ve put our wedding off it would’ve been for nothing bc they aren’t even getting married now. Or it’s on “hold” Has anyone else dealt with anything like this? Was I wrong for going ahead to plan our wedding five months after the fact? I don’t really care when it comes down to it just curious.