(Closed) Dreading Christmas Already

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
1927 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

The Holidays were the hardest time of the year for me. I have been through multiple Christmas’ with no ring and it is hard. The only think I can tell you to get your spirits up is try really hard not to think about it. Make yourself super busy with decorating, buying presents, if you sing then try to find a choir to join, if you like to bake try some new cookie recipes. Try everything you can to get that icky waiting out of your head.

Best of luck!

Post # 4
5977 posts
Bee Keeper

Sorry to hear that you’re so stressed about the holidays. If it helps, I have a love/hate relationship with the holiday season too. My mom and his mom both want us on the same day, and it’s impossible to be 2 places at once. The worst part is, we’re only an hour and a half from everyone, so we’re expected to do things together all the time. My husband and I don’t even get to open our own gifts until the 27th! And he’s usually the one I’m lookign forward to spending the time with!

Hang in there…the holidays will be here and gone before you know it and it will all be over. Try to enjoy each other in the midst of running around to all of the families!

Post # 5
667 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Wow, you have a really busy couple days. I dread the holidays too since my cousin has been engaged since earlier this year and finally set a date so I know i’ll have to endure endless talk about the wedding. Although, I don’t think they are going to be there (they will be with her family) so hopefully it won’t be too bad. Like LetsGoPens, i’ve been though multiple christmases with no ring and I don’t think that will change this year so I know how hard it is. Try to ignore and snarky comments and hopefully everyone will be too busy with everything else that they won’t have time to even say anything.

Post # 6
2025 posts
Buzzing bee

No, it’s not too early to stress. My anxiety usually starts ona November 1st. SO and I both come from separated parents which leaves 4 families to celebrate with twice in less than two months. And of course, there’s always at least one parent/family that insists THEY been seen the DAY OF whatever holiday.

Drive safe, be careful, and try to enjoy it as much as you can. It’s hard now, but I bet once he does put a ring on it, you’ll be rushing to the car to everyone’s house excited to show off your new ring or tell your proposal story.


EDIT: Typo queen this morning :-/

Post # 7
1737 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

My face turned bright red as I explained that we definetly were not as his mom started with “well geez, when is it going to happen???”.

I know it bothers you to hear such statements, but really, it’s your Boyfriend or Best Friend who should feel his face burn when people ask – not you.  In fact, if you can plan out a simple, non-rude/resentful response now along the lines of, “I’m not the one who can answer that question, I’m waiting to know, too,” maybe it can help you avoid feeling put on the spot by people who might speak wihtout realizing how it makes you feel.

I’ve been through many a Christmas without a small black box (AND birthdays, Valentine’s, anniversaries, etc.) and I know it’s no fun to want one particular thing for each and every one of them, only to KNOW there’s a 99.99999% chance it’s NOT there, but you can’t squach that 0.000001% chance of hope, no matter how hard you try. 

AND hosting is stressful – I’d almost be willing to let some of them arrive early and ask them to help with dinner or other preparation – it’s a good way to mingle and makes the guests feel less awkward than if you’re buzzing around trying to do it all.

Hope your December gets better and you manage to have some happy holidays 🙂

Post # 8
384 posts
Helper bee

I’m in the 99.9999999% sure it’s not going to happen this year either so I feel your pain.  one of my very best friends found out her boyfriend is ring shopping and contacting an appraiser so I think she is getting a Christmas proposal.  I’ve very very happy for her, but at the same time I do feel bummed.  She has been dating her SO 5 months less THAN me and my SO.  But who’s counting, right? 


Us, that’s who!!!

Hang in there.  Try to enjoy the holidays and not think about it.  If you can.


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