Dress envy?

posted 1 week ago in Dress
Post # 2
Member
142 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: Fireman’s Pavillion

I always love seeing you post your dress on the bee! It’s not of my favorite ones! (I actually tried it on at DB, but can NOT pull it off like you can)

Im a frequent admirer of wedding dresses that are not mine, and sometimes I get a little dress envy, but there is no “wrong dress” especially if you love it like you seem too.

you picked well and when you marry your spouse, you will feel beautiful and princessy and it’ll all fit together the way you want, and those other dresses will fade away.

Post # 3
Member
681 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

willowrose15 :  I’ve felt the same way when I’ve gone to David’s bridal but I’ve looked at all of their dresses and tried on many that I picked as well as what their consultant suggested so when I go look at that dress to investigate further, I’ll remember / realize why I hadn’t wanted that one.

I also do something similar with my wedding cake. I picked one but then go back and forth between all the different options and came back to my original pick. I think I’ll still do one more round of research so that I know I have looked at all options and have no regrets.

I do it with my engagement ring too and just like with the other things, when I look into the other ring in detail, I remember why I hadn’t picked a ring like that. 

Post # 4
Member
1298 posts
Bumble bee

citizenerased14 :  dress envy is such a real thing! I loved my dress, but I definitely think I could have found one that better accentuated my body than what I chose. I do get dress regret when see some of these amazing dresses, and makes me wish I would have spent more time looking. 

But then I remember how much I absolutely hated dress shopping, so I was ready to make a decision and take me out of my misery lol. I definitely wouldn’t have had the patience (or budget) to continue shopping till I found ‘the’ perfect dress. 

Post # 5
Member
480 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2018 - UK

When I went to pick up my dress right before the wedding, they had a new arrival in which was stunning, my absolute perfect dream dress. I had to stop looking at it because I just fell in love! Once I tried my dress on again though, it all went away and I remembered why I chose it and loved it. 

Post # 6
Member
194 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: City, State

I feel you! I dont know that i can offer that much advice im afraid, but whenever i get doubts or feel sad because there are other gorgeous dresses i just remind myself why i got mine. 

I am mostly susceptible to it from alllll the dresses online, and not helped by the fact i went to 1 shop that didnt have many styles, so i feel like i missed out. In reality i know i couldn’t have ever afforded a dress like the ones i lust for, and i probably wouldn’t have been that comfy in them either! 

Post # 7
Hostess
7563 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2019

citizenerased14 :  Remember that you bought your dress for a reason. Whilst other dresses look nice in store or on other people, you bought your dress because it made you feel like a million dollars. 

Post # 8
Member
5 posts
Newbee

I have been struggling with this so much. My shopping process was unconventional. My mom was willing to help with my budget, but I really struggled to spend a large amount of money on a dress I was only going to wear for a couple of hours. The first store we went to was a little pricey and our next stop at DB was very unorganized and overwhelming. I walked away from that day empty handed.  I ended up going to a place during my lunch break one day and found a dress on the rack that I loved. It was a $1400 Alfred Angelo for $300. I ended up buying it, but now I am having regrets for not taking my time and waiting for my mom to go back with me. It’s a beautiful dress and I think it will look even better once I have my alterations appointment. I just feel like there is so much pressure to have “The perfect dress”. 

Post # 9
Member
288 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2019

I think the important thing to remember is that there are many many beautiful wedding dresses out there but there is only 1 YOUR dress. 

Rather than being envious of the other dresses just apprecaite how lovely they are! I fell in love with a dress, I think it is the most gorgeous dress ever. And I still do. However – it looks like absolute shit on me!! The dress I bought I would never have chosen and when it’s hanging up it’s nice enough but not wow. But when I put it on – it is absolutely THE ONE. 

Enjoy all the dresses but know that yours was made for you 🙂 xx

Post # 10
Member
1599 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2019

Haha! I was the same way! Every time I went to the bridal shop for an appointment, I would look at one and go “Oh thats SO PRETTY!” I just took my mom with me (who graciously bought the dress) and she would say “No. Don’t even think about it” 😉 

Realistically though, as soon as I tried my dress on for fittings, I just knew it was the one! I had my mom take a lot of pictures at each appt. so I could see it again, and as soon as I did I fell back in love with it! Its normal, but just remember the grass isn’t always greener! 

Post # 11
Member
450 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2020

Yeah… I’m having this experience, I think mainly because like a previous poster, my wedding dress shopping experience was unconventional. I guess I feel like I missed out on wedding dress shopping as it’s “supposed” to be, but when I have tried to make appointments at conventional shops, I’ve balked because that doesn’t really feel like something I’d enjoy… or maybe I’m shy and need to try it, just to get over this feeling that I’ve missed something important. 

Anyway- I bought a dress online. It is an Alfred Angelo, and of course it was highly discounted – designed as the dress of the Disney character I used to work as. my fiancé proposed to me where I used to do that job, so it seemed more meaningful than just finding a dress I liked in a store. But the more I look at beautiful photos of dresses, the more I wish I’d just gone and tried them all on. Just to experience it. 

Then I found a design I loved, and commissioned the artist to make me a custom dress like her design, but with hints of the show my fiancé and I were doing when we met. 

Oh AND I bought a short, fun dress to wear for dancing/ reception. But I just picked it off the rack and purchased it- there weren’t any other wedding dresses there to try on. (And I do realize as I’m writing this how very spoiled-brat I sound. Haha) 

So my dress budget is more than spent – but I still have this silly feeling come up now and then. 

I think it’s a combination of things – the inner “little girl” who dreamed of a wedding one day, and the way our society inundates us with wedding marketing, and the importance put on this one dress, which is also a big big marketing buildup.

So I may still do a shopping day just to see what it’s like and be a “bride,” but I do think ultimately this is a normal feeling when surrounded by images of what this dress “should” be and feel like, and what this day “should” include, and all the silly drama that’s engineered to get us to not blink at the massive markup involved in the wedding dress.  

The wedding business treats itself as if we will never have another beautiful dress. And that isn’t so, if we don’t agree with marketing ploys. 🙂 we can have another beautiful dress any damn time we want. To combat this feeling, I’ve promised myself I’ll throw an anniversary party, and wear whatever I choose. 

Post # 12
Member
75 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2020 - North Carolina

I’ve been married before (now planning a wedding with someone who is a much better match for me) and will provide a somewhat seasoned perspective and say that, at the end of the day, it’s just a dress. There are many, many beautiful dresses in the world. The one that you bought to wear is one of them. You probably didn’t buy the most beautiful dress that exists and THAT’S OKAY.

If you feel lovely in it, there is no reason to keep searching. I know that logic is easier to say than practice when it comes to wants and desires, but it’s the truth. The dress, the cake, the ring, etc…all of it is just set dressing for the only things that really matter in your wedding, you and your partner.

It’s nice to feel pretty. Be glad that the dress that you already bought does that for you! 🙂 But I also promise you, there is no “wrong dress” as long as you are marrying the right person.

Post # 13
Member
9 posts
Newbee

I feel the same way. I was so nervous about going dress shopping – I was afraid I would look like a potato in every dress I tried on, and so my one wish was to somehow magically find a dress I loved at my first appointment. And I did. It was the fourth dress I tried on, my mom loved it, my Future Mother-In-Law loved it, the consultants loved it, and that was it. But sometimes I worry that in my haste to just find a dress, I didn’t take the time to try on more options and styles. I see dresses that sparkle and shimmer and, being the magpie I am, wonder if I didn’t make a mistake going for a dress with no sparkle or shimmer. I wonder if I should’ve gone for open back rather than closed, or a different neckline, etc. etc. 

But I just keep telling myself that I would’ve had the same conversation no matter what dress I picked, and that ultimately the dress reflects the vibe I wanted and trust that – on the day – it will all just be exactly what I envisioned. 

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