Post # 1

Member
211 posts
Helper bee
Hi Bees,
I’m starting a new thread as over the past few days I’ve been having second thoughts about my dress – previous thread here https://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/please-help-me-decide-which-sash-belt/
Part of me feels so silly to have gone to all the effort with my first dress and now be considering something else. But as we have not altered my dress I am going to see if we can swap it for a black dress for my daughter as we haven’t purchased hers yet – fingers crossed!
Originally, I wanted something similar to this 
So, originally I bought a top and planned to buy a skirt off Etsy. However, we decided to buy locally to avoid sizing and postage delay issues. When I purchased my dress I was in and out of the store within 45 minutes. I do love the dress I bought, but I wish I went away and thought about it as it’s not exactly what I wanted.
This is the top I bought, which I am thinking of having the straps removed and adding some that are a bit wider and purchasing the skirt below in off white – I’ve added a photo of the top with some off ivory tulle attached to it to get a better idea. Thoughts?
Also, the top will need some minor adjustments and I still need to buy appropriate undergarments.


Post # 2

Member
4531 posts
Honey bee
Do you have a photo with your arms down?
Post # 3

Member
211 posts
Helper bee
@zl27: This is the only one I have.

Post # 4

Member
1274 posts
Bumble bee
- Wedding: September 2021 - Australia
you know what, I like this top, unaltered, more than I like the top of the other dress. I think that and the skirt sound like they’d look romantic and pretty together. If it’s possible to swap the dress you have and this outfit gives you butterflies, I say why not?
Personally, I think a wider strap would be aging, and I wouldn’t do it. I would stick with the straps that are there now, they’re very flattering on you, and even without the proper undergarments, the top fits really nicely. A good strapless bra and you’ll be set!
Post # 5

Member
211 posts
Helper bee
@thecoffeefiend: Thank you so much! The original dress is really pretty, but it’s not quite what I was wanting. Plus I think I didn’t want to waste anyone’s time on the day as I didn’t have an appointment, so I went with that as I thought it was pretty and it fit perfectly. I feel as though this top and a tulle skirt are more me and I would feel that special feeling in them.
The straps are adjustable, so I’m not sure if they look a little tacky?

I just got off the phone with the owner of the bridal store, she remembers me! She said they usually don’t exchange or refund off the rack dresses but she is going to let me swap the dress and choose one for our daughter. We are going to do it all sneaky sneaky so that my partner has no idea. He was with me when I bought the dress, so it will be nice to surprise him on the day.
Post # 6

Member
17 posts
Newbee
- Wedding: April 2011 - Grand Rapids, Michigan
Personally I don’t think wider shoulder straps are aging. Like me, you have broad shoulders and broad shoulders have never been able to pull off a skinny strap very well. A wider strap is aesthecially more pleasing and flattering. Very few women can pull off the super skinny strap like your second top has. Only the super skinny women can, and luckily you’re not too skinny – you’re just right. I would go with about 3/4 to one inch wide. Or even wider if you find a photo with cool wider straps.
And yes, the adjustable buckles need to go. Just be sure the new straps fit you well without digging into your skin….but there should be some elasticity in them so they aren’t falling down all day/night.
Enjoy your wedding day!
Post # 7

Member
211 posts
Helper bee
@swedishcoffee: Thanks for your input! I was thinking perhaps similar straps to the inspiration photo, here’s a different angle

Post # 8

Member
4531 posts
Honey bee
@winterily: I don’t think it is very flattering due to a lack of structure. You can do much better.
Post # 9

Member
3080 posts
Sugar bee
The top you posted looks like lingerie. I like the other one you posted before. Maybe try to find something similar to that if it wasn’t exactly what you wanted?
Post # 10

Member
950 posts
Busy bee
@thecoffeefiend: i agree with all that you said
Post # 11

Member
211 posts
Helper bee
@zl27: I wasn’t wearing a bra with it as I don’t own any strapless bras and wanted to see what it looked like without a bra poking out. I don’t want something with boning/structure in it as I find that super uncomfortable.
Post # 12

Member
1274 posts
Bumble bee
- Wedding: September 2021 - Australia
@winterily: I don’t think it looks tacky being adjustable, but the inspiration image you posted is super cute! When I was thinking broad straps I was imagining these, although neither are quite as bad as what I had pictured – I couldn’t find what I meant! But anyway. Some people would like these, so it’s all a matter of personal taste anyway I guess!


Post # 13

Member
211 posts
Helper bee
@thecoffeefiend: Aren’t they! As soon as I saw them, I loved them!
Post # 14

Member
4531 posts
Honey bee
@winterily: structure does not have to include boning. And well done structure should be comfortable.
I also think a strapless bra will show right through that top. And it will be a hell of a lot less comfortable than a properly structured dress.
Post # 15

Member
3171 posts
Sugar bee
I think maybe you should try on some more dresses/styles. This top looks like lingerie to me, too.