Post # 1
I was so happy to read so many posts about dress regret- it really makes me feel a lot less embarrssed than i felt before, knowing the same thing happens to so many other brides! Never the less, the feeling is still there and I would love to hear your thoughts please help me! 🙂
Long story short, I went shopping by myself to about 5 bridal stores (my best friend works in retail and i wanted to get an idea of what i liked before i asked her to take a sick day to come shopping). i found a few dresses i liked but none gave me that emotional feeling we have been programmed (?) to expect. I ended up asking my dad and brother to come and see my two favourites so far, because my mum died about 4 years ago and i wanted to involve them and still have that special family moment that everyone else gets to experience. They loved one of the dresses so much and i was really touched to see their faces and reaction that I think it swayed my decision and yes i ordered (and paid in full) for the dress. I think having very mixed emotions about my mum not being there mixed up my brain and i did it in haste! yes i like the dress very much but it never made me tear up or anything.
Then i went back to try it on last week (with my best friend and a bridesmaid) who took some photos of me in it and the photos turned out to be AWFUL! the sales lady was too busy trying to sell me veils and headpieces and i dont think she actually laced the dress up properly which is why the photos looked so terrible 🙁 i was so gutted when i got home 🙁
This is my dress:
Then to make matters worse I went dress shopping with my other engaged friend (who doesnt even have a set budget!) who went to a couture shop and the minute i walked in i was in love with every single dress there (most would have been 4 – 6K!) and just the quality and fabric and the way the lady treated everyone and the fact that you would be getting a gown made especially for you and the experience of that just seems so special. I mean you only get one wedding dress, imagine if it was made especially for you, to your exact mesaurements and with beautiful fabric and wonderful service?
I dont know if i would regret not getting a couture gown made (and this is northing to do with impressing others or anything like that. its more the experience and the fact that I have terrible style normally and I usually buy really cheap clothes in general so why not splurge for once if i can afford to?) For once it would be nice to feel special and your wedding day is the best time for that i guess! plus its the last time im ever going to be able to be selfish seeing as we are planning on babies soon after the wedding 🙂
any thoughts? should i try to sell my original dress and go couture?
Post # 3
@nicolaflower: Your dress is gorgeous! One word of advice- don’t ever trust pictures taken inside a bridal salon. The lighting in salons is unique to the industry (like jewelry store lighting). Add non-pro photography to that, and the pictures don’t look anything like what you’ll really look like on your wedding day.
I would go back when the store isn’t crazy busy, and make sure it’s laced up exactly right. Try to get near some windows with natural lighting. Wear makeup, do you hair, and snap a few more pics.
Don’t worry! Your dress is beautiful. 🙂
Post # 4
I think your dress is gorgeous. And I agree, bridal salon photos aren’t the best to judge by (most of mine look horrible).
Post # 5
Your dress is stunning! I’ve seen a few brides on here with the same style and it looks really beautiful on! It’s a very flattering shape.
I can understand your desire to go couture, especially after you had such an awful experience at your own shop, but it is a massive investment for a dress that you’re only going to wear once!
Maybe you could go and buy a really nice piece of designer clothing that makes you feel amazing… You could get a really beautiful dress or jacket or something for WAY less than the difference between your wedding dress and a couture gown, and you get to wear it again (I’m wearing my stunning new handpainted silk dress for our rehearsal dinner, and I’m sure I’ll be able to pull it out for plenty of events in the future). And you’ll have a dress that makes you look amazing on your wedding day AND a beautiful luxurious something to wear that can make you feel special more often.
I’m sure you’ll look beautiful whatever you choose to do 🙂
Post # 6
I also think you may have dress regret over spending so much for a couture dress? Yes, the experience is nice and I’m sure the dress would be gorgeous but your dress is STUNNING. And maybe you’d regret not getting the one your Dad and brother really loved you in? If you are like me you’ll feel kind of guilty for indulging. I’m with the other poster about buying something you normally wouldn’t like a designer dress or such and will be able to wear again.
Your dress is one of the prettiest I’ve seen on Weddingbee in some time. I hope you later post pics of yourself in it or your Couture dress if you do go that route. Only you know what untimately will feel best to you. I’m just too frugal to do it but to you it may feel like a wonderfu treat.
Pics, Pics, Pics…lol 🙂
Post # 7
Ditto on the hair and makeup. It makes a huge difference.
Post # 8
your dress is beautiful! i love that your dad and brother loved it, the fact that they are willing to go with you is pretty special. i think you should go back and get some better pictures. i wouldnt bother worryng that a much more expensive dress suits your taste.
Post # 9
I agree with the above comments. Your dress is beautiful, and in-store pictures don’t usually turn out well. Go back again and try it on in a better frame of mind. I think in the end you’d feel worse if you spent so much money on a couture dress. The dress is super important, but once the day is done, the thought of a $6000 dress will eat away at you (unless you can easily splash out that much without blinking).
Post # 10
Keep the dress, buy amazing shoes. Once you have the dress altered for you (to your precise measurements) and a professional photog in good lighting, you won’t believe the difference. You’ll be on your feet all day though, and there really is a quality and comfort difference in $20 and $200 shoes.
The way I saw it was this- I got a cheap-ish DB dress, because I’m only going to wear it one day for a few hours while I’m *a bride*. Brides are by definition beautiful, and no one will remember the dress or even probably differentiate it from nine million other strapless lace wedding dresses except me, it’s flattering, and while it might not be coture, once it’s fit to me, it’ll be flattering. I got expensive (not exorbitant, but $250, 10x what I’d usually spend on shoes) Badgley Mischka shoes, because I will wear them until they fall apart, cobble them back together, and wear them til they fall apart again. And they were still much cheaper than splurging on a wedding dress would’ve been. 🙂
Post # 11
Your dress is beautiful , but if you can afford a 4+ k go for it!!
Post # 12
Thank you so much for all the advice! Sorry i didnt realise there had been so many posts as i wasnt getting any email notifications.
I really love the idea of getting a designer dress (honeymoon dress maybe ) and spending the extra money on some really good shoes. I am normally very frugal so it wouldnt hurt to start collecting some really good quality stuff for my sad sad cheap wardrobe!
So, I am going back to the dress shop this afternoon with Dad and he is bringing his fancy camera and I spent mearly 40 mins putting my makeup on and doing my hair this morning before work 🙂 hopefully it doesnt all go pear shaped…it’s a humid 33 degrees today and i dont have very good aircon in my car…. wish me luck!!
I’ll let you know how i go and if i have any nice pics (fingers crossed!) i will post them.
Post # 13
sigh….bad news…i like it even less now!
it is gorgeous yes, but on the model. i really think it makes me look short and chubby- even with sky high heels on. i have big boobs and am also very short so even though im not chubby sometimes i can look pretty gross if the shape of my clothes are wrong.
the photos were definitely alot better this time so i know its not that, i just felt crappy and i was so hot underneath all those layers of synthetic fabric! i could literally feel big drops of sweat trickling down my legs and when the lady tried to take the dress off over my head it was stuck to me with sweat! 🙁
80% sure i am going to sell this one and move on. oh well, something was bound to go wrong, hopefully this is all!