Dress shop owner being incredibly rude: ruining my dress experience :(

posted 1 year ago in Dress
Post # 2
863 posts
Busy bee

futuremrscaribou :  I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. It sounds like this lady’s customer service skills are not up to par. While I don’t agree with what she did, I do see why she did it. She’s an expert in the dresses and ordered up a size based on your measurements. Maybe that wasn’t the best call for you, but it makes logical sense. I’m sure she knows the various designers and sizing like the back of her hand.

If you were to rewrite her email and replace size 12, 14 and 16 with 0, 2 and 4 would you still feel that she attacked you about your size? She may be a bit blunt about things and I see why you feel like you do, but she might just be trying to have really open communication from this point on. It sounds like she was being honest about hip measurements and waist measurements–no shame in that 🙂

I’d be upset if I were in your situation too. But, in the grand scheme of things, the seamstress will alter the dress perfectly to your body, at no cost to you, and you’re going to look absolutely fab.u.lous. Don’t stress about it yet 🙂

Post # 3
2694 posts
Sugar bee

Honestly it sounds like you’re more upset with the number 14 than the actual measurements. You say it’s huge, but don’t specify how much bigger in terms of actual measurements. Do you know the actual measurements of size 12 and if that would work with your measurements? Honestly, it sounds like she ordered the right size. She didn’t go about explaining it well at all, though!!!

Don’t fret over the size. Wedding dresses are known to be 2-4 sizes smaller than your street size, so you have to order up. I ordered my dress in a size I never thought I would ever be. And it feels horrible! I get it. But try to forget about the number, and look at your measurements instead.

Post # 5
2694 posts
Sugar bee

futuremrscaribou :  I totally agree!!! I’d take the money she’s offering for alterations, and try to forget about her rudeness for now. There’s no sense in getting yourself stressed about this. As you said, you want to enjoy this experience! Then after the wedding write an honest review of your experience with her. 

Post # 6
6599 posts
Bee Keeper

Does your receipt say you ordered a 12? Is your wedding actually in October? Honestly I would file a complaint with my credit card and complain that you ordered a 12, they sent you a 14 and won’t correct it. THen buy a dress elsewhere and leave her a horrible review. But if your wedding is in october you dont have much time =\ Sorry bee, I agree that shes being terrible. 

Post # 8
91 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

Once you’ve had it altered and in your possession I’d be leaving a nasty yet professional review of them on every avenue possible. All wedding sites, yelp and Facebook. 

Post # 10
733 posts
Busy bee

Her e-mail was completely unprofessional. But since your wedding is so close, I would put the feelings aside and do what you have to do to get everything altered in time. Once you have it in hand, leave reviews about your experience wherever you can.

Post # 11
355 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

It’s lame that she’s being defensive, but you got what you actually need from her (alterations comped) so let it go for now.

I don’t think she’s calling you fat, but it’s completely weird that they said it’d be ordered by size not measurements and then she had this whole argument about the measurements of the sample. Maybe she knew you’d tried on the sample but didn’t know it was too big?

Anyway, keep your eye on the goal (a nice fitting dress) and try to let go of the idea of beautiful memories of the dress shopping experience as that ship has clearly sailed. Play nice at least until you have the completed dress in hand. Sounds like she needs to work on communication within her shop!

Post # 13
1341 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

futuremrscaribou :  She’s almost certainly bullied other brides and been unprofessional before but no one has stood up to her, like you they probably try to forget the bad experience! I agree with other posters, I would wait to get the garment in hand, enjoy your wedding, and then post honest reviews wherever possible. Focus on her use of swear words and yelling, that is objectively unacceptable regardless of the situation.

Sorry you didn’t get the blissful boutique experience. Don’t let it affect your feelings of your gown, though! So long as you are happy with your outfit on the day, that’s what matters… take enjoyment from the garment and try to forget how hard gotten it was!

Post # 14
2867 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2018

futuremrscaribou :  She sounds sassy and relatively unprofessional but I honestly think she was using her expertise to make the correct judgement call. Whether you disagree with it or not, samples stretch. They are tried on by hundreds of women (many of which are not exactly gentle). It would be cost prohibitive for bridal salons to order new samples every time one stretched a bit considering most women try on dresses in a variety of sizes anyways. I obviously don’t know who told you they order by size instead of measurements, but I have never once been to any formal salon that orders from anything but a clients measurements. Different designers have different size charts, ordering by size instead of measurement would be a disaster waiting to happen. While you have stated in your updates that it did not bother you that she labeled you as a 14, it is still very much coming across the opposite. 

Ultimately, the manager used her professional judgment to order the size that would fit you best and is covering the alterations. Leave a negative review about her attitude if you feel it necessary but I don’t know what else you’re expecting from her (or us for that matter). 

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