(Closed) dress stress!

posted 6 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
Member
127 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

First off, I recommend keeping your hopes high in terms of finding an amazing dress that you love. I was absolutely sure when I started dress shopping that I wouldn’t want a strapless neckline but 100% changed my mind almost immediately. However, the same type of thing happend between me and my Fiance. I was sure I wanted a simple ballgown but then we went to a friend’s wedding and he said he did not like the bride’s dress at all and it was fairly similar to what I was envisioning 🙁 I bit the bullet and showed him some photos and we were not on the same page at all. At first, this caused a mild panic attack for me but once I went back and tried more dresses that were more of a compromise I found a beautiful dress that I’m fairly confident he will love. Looking back now, I’m actually glad I didn’t get the simple ballgown because the dress I chose I would have never even tried on had it not been for my Fiance and I love it!

So, basically keep your options open and don’t be afraid to try on LOTS of dresses and take multiple trips to different stores.

Also, I’m going to attach a photo of a dress that might be something like what you’re looking for. You won’t find many dresses with straps at the stores but you’ll be surprised to find enough to try on to see if that’s even what you really want. Good luck and keep us updated!

Post # 4
Member
4520 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Don’t ask for FI’s opinion! What he thinks looks good in a picture and what actually looks good on you are 2 totally different things. He is going to love the way you look. Honestly. I would not involve him at all, ignore what he said, and pick a dress you like. 

Post # 5
Member
111 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@patchy:  If you’re self-conscious about wearing tank tops and showing a lot of skin, don’t do the strapless. You want to feel your best on your big day!! It’s true that most gowns do come in strapless styles, but there are a decent amount of dresses with straps/sleeves out there. Aaaand, I found that most designers and/or seamstresses are willing to build sleeves on a dress for you. So if you find a strapless one that you like, for a couple hundred dollars more, you can custom make whatever sort of sleeve you want.

I wanted a dress with some sort of sleeve or strap just because I feel like everyone does strapless and I wanted something different. I thought it’d be quite a task to find something not-strapless, but you’d be surprised.

Also, don’t get too crazy about specific types of sleeves or necklines because of what your Fiance said. I’m sure that’s easier said than done … but when you walk down the aisle looking magnificent, I doubt he’ll be harking back to online photos and what types of silhouettes he preferred on the dress models.

Go with your gut and good luck!

Post # 6
Member
5958 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

If I asked Mr. 99’s opinion about anything I wore, I would look like some strung out, extra cheap, worn out Abbey Lane drag queen…..he has no idea how clothes go together or what works on me….No, I wouldn’t ask him ever.  I’ll just settle for coming down the stair ten minutes late, seeing his eyes light up and hearing him say, “wow”

A man has no place in his wife’s closet, unless he’s putting in more shelves for her shoes!

Post # 9
Member
111 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@Nona99:  Amazing answer! haha  You tell ’em girl!!

Post # 10
Member
1841 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

My Fiance has way more fashion sense than me. I hate going shopping unless I take him along to style me.  

Post # 11
Member
8472 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

Well it’s natural to want to please him, it sounds like he’s making this process a lot more difficult than it already can be for some girls. 

What you need to do is know your style and get a dress that is “you.”  Everyone said dress shopping will be a cinch for me because I’m tall and thin and everything will look good, and yes they were right, but you have to get the one you feel the absolute most beautiful in!

If it’s a strapless, then it’s a strapless!  I never wore strapless shirts over the summer and I ended up with a strapless dress.  (I wanted halter top but that’s like nearly impossible to find in a wedding gown.)  So what I did during the month of June was buy a ton of strapless dresses and I wore them so he’d get to see me in that style and know I was comfortable in it. 

You’re a bride, you are going to be gorgeous in his eyes if you wear straps, no straps, etc…

So don’t worry so much and enjoy dress shopping… It does get crazy (I tried on about 100 dresses!) but when you find the right one, you just know.. (and will probably cry!)

Post # 13
Member
8472 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@patchy:  you’re welcome!  Maybe what you can try is buying the strapless shirts and wearing cardigans over them for now.  And it’s the best time to buy summer things since they are all on sale Smile

Is your fiance going shopping with you?  If so, then that can work in your favor.. You don’t necessarily have to get one he saw you in if you want it a surprise, but something similar so it is still a surprise. 

 

Post # 14
Member
2390 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

First off, don’t ask for his opinion!!!  Believe me, when he sees you on your wedding day, with your hair, makeup, etc., he’s going to think you look GORGEOUS, and that you’re the most beautiful bride in the world.  It makes no difference what dress you’re wearing.

Also, guys don’t remember that the way a model in a magazine looks is generally NOT how a normal girl will look in any given dress.  I would never have tried my dress on if I had seen it on a model because frankly I didn’t like it in photos that I saw after.

Be open to trying on all different shapes and styles – you never know what might look good on you!  I found the consultant at the shop very helpful – she pulled things for me that I wouldn’t have picked, and I ended up liking the stuff she picked WAY better than the stuff I picked.

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