Post # 1
I need you girls to help me work through something that happened this weekend. We live in Mississippi and my wedding is in Michigan (where we are from and all our family still lives). We went up to Michigan this weekend for super cram packed trip full of wedding planning and two different showers. This trip also included a dress fitting where my seamstress took a couple pictures of my dress, which I assumed she would email to my mom or me. This was on Saturday.
After a super busy Sunday with another shower a couple hours from my parents home and driving all over the state, we crashed that night and got up early Monday to drive home (took us 18 hours with traffic). Tuesday I dragged myself out of bed and got to work. Sitting at home on Tuesday night perusing Facebook I realize that my seamstress posted pictures of me wearing my wedding dress to FACEBOOK for everyone to see! I had a hair/makeup trial that morning so I was all done up in my dress, veil on, everything exactly like it would be on wedding day. The picture had likes and comments. I am HORRIFIED and so upset that someone would do this! I am beside myself that my big moment on wedding day where everyone turns to see me has basically been ruined.
My mom thinks I am completely overreacting. I want a different dress because this one has completely lost its wow factor to me. It’s no longer special, at all, and I feel a little sick when I think about wearing it after everyone and their brother has had a good look at it online. What would you bees do? I need some advice and perspective.
Post # 3
Were you tagged in the pictures? Were the likes and comments from people you personally know? If yes, that’s totally something that would infuriate me as well. If no, you can mitigate the damage by asking her to make the photos for “her friends only” and not for public use. If I were in your shoes, I would email her to ask that she kindly takes them down. There is little else you can do at the point. I feel for you though…I’d be so mad!!
As for getting a new dress though…I don’t think you need to go that far. You still have a couple months until your wedding and no one is going to remember or be prepared for how wonderful you look in person!
Post # 4
Never mind the fact that the situation has changed how you feel about the dress, but the seamstress had absolutely no right to post it on Facebook without your permission. It’s a very poor business ethic to think it would be OK to do that. At the very least I would politely-yet-assertively request that the photo be removed. They’d be out of their minds not to comply.
Post # 5
Things never look the same in photos as they do in real life. Also, if you weren’t tagged, no one knows the picture exists.
Post # 6
Oh wow! thats no good! Did she tag you in the pictures??? if its just on her website and your not tagged, thats not as bad, but still she has no right… I doubt anybody you know will go to her facebook page to look at dresses, so just hav her remove it and you’ll be find 🙂
Post # 7
Hey ladies, yup I was tagged and so was my mom. I didn’t notice it until later since our weekend was so crazy I hadn’t checked facebook. Comments and likes from people I personally know. I’m crushed. It is good to know that some of you would still wear it. She did take down the picture thank goodness.
Post # 8
@SouthernCJ: She had no right to put up such a personal photo … out of her mind, that one! I think the overwhelming consensus is that you shouldn’t let this ruin how you originally felt about the dress. Again, your wedding is a couple months away…the ruckus will die down and it will be nothing more than a distant memory! Your wedding day will far outshine it!
Post # 9
WOW that is B.S.! I would be pissed – you have every right to be infuriated. Unfortunately, unless money is very disposable for you, I do not think you should get a new dress. Presumably you bought this dress because you loved it and it was special to you, and although your feelings may have temporarily changed, it still should be very special to you. Could you change your accessories or veil instead, so you don’t feel so much like everyone has seen your “look”? And like others said, photo vs. you walking down the aisle is really no comparison.
If you wanted to be sneaky, maybe you could take some pics of you trying on different wedding dresses, like you were still shopping, and intermittently post those, just to throw people off. They might get confused and not remember what the real one looks like! Just an idea…
Post # 10
I’m so sorry! I don’t think you’re overreacting at all. Is there anything you can do to change the dress the look of the dress? A new hem, straps, a sash? I would hate for you to shell out money for a new dress. Maybe you could sell that one and get a new one?
and I can’t even fathom how this woman could think that was acceptable. I would be irrate and would purse another seamstress if possible. she doesn’t deserve anymore of your money!
Post # 11
@MsChippyChap: That’s a good idea!
I totally understand how crushed you are, @SouthernCJ – but I agree with others that you shouldn’t let this ruin how you feel about your dress. Now that the picture is not on your FB anymore, no one will remember exactly what it looked like by the time the wedding rolls around. Honestly, your dress isn’t nearly as important to anyone else as it is to you, and for the people who saw it, it will be “out of sight, out of mind.” I doubt they will even remember seeing it, to be honest.
Post # 12
Holy moley that sucks! But buying a new dress on such short notice when you’ve paid for the first and all the alterations seems silly to me. At least ask the seamstress to take it down!
Post # 13
OP – I am SO mad on your behalf! I cannot believe anyone would do that! My jaw literally dropped when I read that your seamstress posted all these pictures of you on FB and tagged you.
Honestly, I would get a new dress. Even if it wasn’t in the budget – I would freaking find a way to get another one because I feel very strongly about no one seeing my dress before the wedding day. I know some may think it’s silly, but if that’s your preference then just get a new dress!!
Post # 14
OMG! I would slap that seamstress! Who does such a thing! I dont think you are overreacting but your dress in pictures looks completely different then it does in person. I would contact that seamstress and ask her to take down that picture ASAP!!!!! Then I wouldnt pay her! ha!
Post # 15
That’s terrible. I can’t believe she did that. I don’t think you’re overreacting because I think I would have the same initial reaction. However, I would give yourself time to calm down. You already own this dress and it’s “the” dress. The picture is gone and people will likely completely forget what it looked like. Even if they remember, you will look different on your wedding day. I wouldn’t get a new dress over it. But so sorry this happened to you!
Post # 16
First of all, I agree with PPs that this was very unprofessional on the part of your seamstress and you have a right to be upset. However, I think that getting a new dress is a big time overreaction. Honestly I don’t think it’s that big of a deal. People won’t have looked at it in awhile and things are totally different in person. And to put in some perspective here, the “special moment” should be your marriage to the man you love, not people seeing you all dolled up for the first time. You picked your ensemble because you love it so wear it with pride and you will be breathtaking. I promise.