Dropping a bridesmaid

posted 2 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Am I wrong for dropping her?
    Yes : (5 votes)
    20 %
    No : (16 votes)
    64 %
    Not Certain : (4 votes)
    16 %
  • Post # 16
    Member
    95 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: June 2018

    Yikes. This sounds like a big ol mess and I would defnitely not let the father officiate my wedding. We obviously don’t know the whole picture here, but I would just suggest eloping at this point. I realize that might not be possible, especially if your mom has already paid for most of the wedding. At the very least, I would make sure his family has almost nothing to do with this wedding… 

    Post # 17
    Member
    620 posts
    Busy bee

    Firstly, I wouldnt be speaking with that family again without your Fiance present. Its his family and he needs to drive the defence. 

    Secondly, I would not hav that Father officiate my wedding. He has lost the right and honour to do so and I would be telling him exactly why. 

    You’ve got to stand up for yourself and let everyone know how its going to be. Dont be ashamed on calling out the father and the sister to people as they have done wrong by you and do not give a crap.

    Get on the same page with your Fiance, create a strong front and tackle these two viscious people head on.

    Post # 20
    Member
    11643 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2015

    emmamei :  good plan. We see this too often to be shocked- the great in laws who turn horrible upon engagement. There are tons of great in laws, but the bad ones stand out, sadly. 

    Post # 22
    Member
    620 posts
    Busy bee

    emmamei :  Sounds like a good plan. I’d be scared to aswell. It seems like they have attacked you when they know he isnt there to back you which is pretty sh*tty. I’m sorry you’re going through this drama, weddings have enough to think about without petty family drama.

    Post # 23
    Member
    428 posts
    Helper bee

    They’re crazy, abusive and liars. Agree with pp it sounds like of you’re not careful and don’t have a united front and a clear plan for dealing with their shit show, you will be the next ex. This much disrespect and crazy is a lot to deal with for the next 5 decades!

    I would ignore all communications and contact until your Fiance is home. Then, confront the behavior and lay down the law. Hope you are able to get ffil  replaced because allowing him to behave that way and then officiate your wedding is reinforcing that bad behavior. How rude. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this during what should be an exciting time. 

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