Drunk friend ruined my reception :(

posted 2 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 16
Member
240 posts
Helper bee

I’m with holisticbabe. I (and my family) would be super pissed and I would probably put some distance between myself and her. It’s an incredibly disrespectful thing to do, especially if there are kids at the wedding. So yeah, I think your anger is justified.

Because it’s in the past and you didn’t kick her out, I think you just have to focus on the positives and choose to be happy with the day. Your memories will be what you make them.

Post # 17
Member
590 posts
Busy bee

I have a group of 6 very close girl friends. 3 of them have had weddings in the past year. 

At one of these weddings another girl from that same group of friends came with her boyfriend. Her boyfriend got soooo drunk. He vomited in a pint glass at the bar. So his girlfriend took him to bed (there were bedrooms where he was staying above the venue)….an hour later he came downstairs to rejoin the wedding….naked! 

At the next friend’s wedding from that group, the bride was upset nothing like that happened at her wedding. She kept asking us the next day ‘Was there any drama? Ohhh what a boring wedding I was hoping for some Gossip’ 

 

Post # 18
Member
3560 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

breyalynn :  at my friend’s wedding, a bridesmaid fainted right before the pronouncement. At my wedding, my dad used the word “titties” 10 seconds into his speech (which only got worse from there). There’s always SOMETHING. Your wedding wasn’t ruined – it was clearly a great party!

Post # 19
Member
1102 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

happybridetobe1988 :  that is amazing. Oh my god ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ poor guy is probably HORRFIED. 

Post # 20
Member
12108 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

I am another apparent outlier. I do not consider behavior like this par for the course or inevitable at a wedding. She would not get a free or easy pass from me. She was given an honor and public recognition as one of your closest friends. Her actions were disrespectful to you, your guests and certainly your H’s friend and his wife. A simple “sorry” would not cut it. Drunk or not, she’s responsible for her choices and their consequences. 

Post # 21
Member
279 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - City, State

I had the same situation at my wedding this past September. My bridesmaid did the exact same things yours did. The last hour of my reception was spent with tears, arguing amongst the bridal party, and arguing with my new husband! I was so embarrassed. But you just have to move on. Remember that 99% of the day went perfect, and guess what? You’re married now, and that’s the important part!

Most people who hear the story say “Well, there’s always one! What’s a wedding without a drunk fool?”

It’s been about four months now, and while I don’t laugh about it, it definitely doesn’t bother me as much as it did. Give it time ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 22
Member
1302 posts
Bumble bee

i’m wondering why no one took her home…

i can see why you’d be upset and how the memory of her inappropriate behavior would loom large when you think about your reception. as someone who has humiliated themselves while drunk i can assure you your bridesmaid would like to shrink down to nothing. your wedding and reception surely had so many lovely things that you can focus on instead. it might take some effort, but whenever you think of something she did actively choose a charming memory to call to mind. it’ll help. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 23
Member
1504 posts
Bumble bee

I’m horrified and embarrassed for you.  Your reception and wedding are happy moments now, but the memory is there.  All you can do is accept it and move forward.  Use it as a learning experience and decide what you want to do with the friendship – only you know if you can accept and forgive or not.  

 

Post # 24
Member
9809 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Sounds like a hell of a time!

As a guest, I would find that hilarious and amazing and way better then any stale reception where everyone behaved.

Post # 25
Member
978 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

To me this goes beyond usual drunk reception behavoir. Sure “ruined my wedding” is a tad strong but if one of my closest friends flashed her boobs and tried to kiss a married groomsman at my wedding I’d definitely be mad. Since she apologized and you want to forgive her, I’m sure the anger will fade with time, but fair enough to vent away a bit! 

Post # 26
Member
2139 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

Yuck. What gross behavior. It always surprises me when people can’t control themselves at weddings. It’s like open bar = open invite to get smashed for free. That being said… why didn’t someone try to get her a cab back to the hotel? I had a very drunk guest vomiting in the bathroom at my wedding and my BMs collected the guest’s boyfriend, her things, and helped them call transport to the hotel. No one wants to be that guest at a wedding. 

Post # 27
Member
1302 posts
Bumble bee

edit: i commented on the wrong thread so i deleted it. 

 

Post # 28
Member
379 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

An old friend of mine (that I hadn’t seen in a pretty long time-he was invited as one of my closest friends in high school, though we live in different states and have grown apart) got drunk and made a really crass speech at my wedding.  It was pretty cringey, but ultimately says more about him than Darling Husband and I.  Same for your situation!  Don’t let it ruin your reception…its all a matter of perception and where you choose to focus your attention.

Post # 29
Member
2758 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

I feel like having at least one very drunken bridesmaid/groomsman by the end of the night is pretty much on par for the course at any wedding with a bar. At the end of our reception one of my bridesmaids had stripped off her dress in the middle of the hall, was crying and (mildly) harassing our day of coordinator about how she had “promised to buy her a new dress” because she had spilled on herself. I thought it was hilarious, I just took her to bed (we stayed at the venue), and whenever my group of friends get together we still talk about it and laugh. 

From your title I thought she had assaulted someone or tried to break up your marriage! I hope that soon you can laugh this off. And I agree with PP, as it sounds like this was ongoing behaviour for at least a little while, if you were really that bothered why didn’t someone take her to bed?

Post # 30
Member
1490 posts
Bumble bee

This happens at every wedding I go to. There is always one! Usually fantastic entertainment. Don’t even worry about it. 

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