Post # 1
Last summer, I was Maid of Honor in a wedding where there was ALSO a Matron of Honor. It was a nice way to honor us both, but the bride didn’t do a very good job of telling us what our “duties” were. We worked together on planning her Bachelorette party, but she didn’t communicate where we would stand (which closer to the bride?), who would hold her bouquet, who would take care of her train/bustle, who would sign the marriage license, who would do a toast, etc. We were kind of left to sort this out on our own.
Now that I’m getting married, I’m also doing a Maid and Matron of Honor (and 4 bridesmaids.) Although it all worked out, I want to make sure I do a better job of setting expectations than this bride did, just to save my girls some stress and potential drama. For others in this situation – how are you dividing up jobs between your Maid and Matron?
Post # 3
I have both and I was wondering the same things.
Post # 4
I have both too (and 4 other BM’s). It was an easy decision for me because my Matron of Honor will stand second and her Hubby will stand second with the guys. That leaves my Maid of Honor to stand next to me. My Matron of Honor lives in Tallahassee with me but she just had a baby. She will bustle my dress because she can practice with me before hand.
My Maid of Honor is a high school friend and lives in Melbourne. She will plan most of the bachelorette party etc.
I am kinda hoping maybe they both do short toasts?
Post # 5
I have two sisters and we were both maids of honor at my sister’s wedding in October and when I get married, they will both be “of honor” as well.
For my sister’s wedding, I did a little more than my younger sister because she was still in school and unable to travel back and forth the help. It didn’t make her role less important, but there was a difference in activites.
We figured out the standing and signing issues by age. And eventually, each of us will get the be the one that holds the flowers and signs the license for each other.
For my wedding planning, but of them want to help as much as possible, so when it comes time to actually get down to the work, I will be asking them to help with the things they will enjoy the most.
My biggest concern is that my other bridesmaid wants to be super active as well. Its great, but finding jobs to delegate is going to be a challenge. Especially since I want to do so much myself 🙂
Let us know how you work it out!
Post # 6
Thanks for the input everyone….my Maid of Honor is the only one who lives near me, so inevitably she’s helping with most things. That’s a good point that @caszos made about being able to practice the bustle – I should probably have my sister do that since she’ll be coming to my fittings.
Post # 7
I’m still interested at what other people are doing for this. I’ve known my maid/matron for the same amount of time and we’re equally close. I just lucked out that one of my best friends got married last summer. Not sure how to delegate without them being upset.