(Closed) duties of a maid of honor

posted 4 years ago in Traditions
Post # 2
709 posts
Busy bee

Sharyalick:  it really depends on the person. As you can see on the Bridesmaids board often brides and bridesmaids have different expectation of what falls in a BM’s / MOH’s duty. So it’s probably best to check with your sister what she expects from you, and what you are willing to do… <br />Plenty of times Maid/Matron of Honor will be in charge of 

– the bridal shower 

– the Bachelorette’s <br />So since you don’t live in the same state, I am not sure if she just wants a local shower maybe hosted by your Mom or some other relative… And not sure if she cares about a bachelorette either… I guess best is to have an open talk about expectations on both sides. 

Post # 4
709 posts
Busy bee

Sharyalick:  A Bridal Shower is a Celebration of the bride to be. Usually it’s hosted by the Maid/Matron of Honor, or the Mother of the Bride or another close female. it usually involves gifts for the bride… and maybe some drinks or coffee and cake or appetizers or whatever time of day it’s held at. But that might not be feasible to do if everyone lives in another place. And some showers also have some games… e.g. focussed on the future bride and groom…. 

So you want to do this Get together on Oct 23rd? I guess maybe just look into what kind of locations are availble when you visit in June… maybe even just the hotel restaurant or hotel bar to make it easiest for everyone travelling? or depending on your interests you could look into other options for the ladies as well… pub crawl / cooking class / spa… whatever seems like everyone would enjoy most?

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 4 months ago by  Kili.
Post # 5
1164 posts
Bumble bee

I think you need to ask your sister what she is expecting.  I want my Maid/Matron of Honor to help me choose my dress, wear a dress we’ve picked together, help me get ready on the day and remind me how awesome my Fiance is if I freak out.

However I have also heard of brides expecting all or any of the following: help planning and organising the wedding,  help making diy stuff,  organising a bridal shower and a bachelorette, the Maid/Matron of Honor to wear and pay for a dress chosen by the bride, general just be willing to do whatever and whenever the bride wants, her to hold x, y and z on the day, help her pee in her dress, do a speech,  organise people for photos and many othrr things…

Post # 6
604 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Sharyalick:  I think you should discuss her expectations of you beforehand.  If you don’t know what she expects you can’t be there for her the way she needs you to be.  It’s also important for her to understand that your lack of ability to help in the same way as other MOH’s does not reflect upon how much you care about her.  Wedding planning is stressful and it’s best to be on the same page from the get go.

Post # 7
118 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

It really depends. My Maid/Matron of Honor and I are reversed from you (my Maid/Matron of Honor is in TX and I am in FL). She is helping doing some of the planning for the bach/shower (I think), but to my knowledge she is not actually attending either. My local BMs are taking care of a lot of the logistics. I am sort of out of the loop, so I could be off, but that is my impression. She is kind of the coordinator and is delegating what she can’t do personally. I knew she wouldn’t be able to be super involved when I asked her (she has a life and is far away), but I chose her because she is like my sister and who I wanted on my other side when I married the love of my life. Everything else is awesome, but extra, in my opinion. 

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