- 7 years ago
So an old co-worker of mine is having a Destination Wedding in January in Florida. I just got an email from her sister last night saying this:
“A & A are tying the knot.
As friends & family of the two here is what you’re invited to do
Let’s shower them with money for their Ocean Wedding Spot!
Jack & Jill Snack and Hot tub Shower
I don’t need an official time everyone is coming just yes and how many so we have enough food…
BYOB and a chair and we will supply the rest. We will be cutting cake at 9pm and it will be outside/inside depending on weather.”
Now, while I was working with A, we frequently chatted about our wedding planning. Before I go on, I’d like to mention that she and the groom are already legally married. They did the quick ceremony/paperwork back in March, but they weren’t telling their families. Something about wanting to get it done ASAP, but still pleasing the families by having a Destination Wedding (but yet lieing to them…).
I’m quite positive that Fiance and I are not invited to the Destination Wedding and that they’re not having a reception at any time (though, maybe this is supposed to be the equivalent? But calling it a “shower”?). A was invited to my shower and they’re both invited to the wedding, though A didn’t come to the shower and didn’t send a gift (which I’m not putting against her at all because I know they’re short on cash and trying to save up for DW!) and haven’t gotten an RSVP as of yet.
I’m just not sure whether I should be a bit offended by this or that I want to go. I’m also not sure whether A actually wants this shower. Her sister may have begged her, pouted and complained when she said no, went to the parents and complained, then A just gave in because its not worth it (Yes, she complained about her sister doing this frequently, so is a possibility!) and she’s certainly not the money-grabbing type! I certainly don’t want to condone this terrible etiquette, but I also want to support A for her big day! I’m thinking about talking it over with A…
Opinions, thoughts, what you might do… let ‘er rip, hive!