Post # 1
Member
506 posts
Busy bee
I love wedding planning, and I love having a Destination Wedding, but now we also prefer eloping just the two of us more (or maybe only with 6 guests – which was our orginal plan; but then somehow that got away, and now we invite 40 guests, and probably 25- 30 will attend).
Part of me want to have more guests and having a proper wedding. But on the other hand, I have cold feet what if not many people can attend; and also FH and I want to get hitch earlier; if we do only 6 guests or less; we can do it in 2013 instead of 2014 (we mostly chose 2014 so that we can save enough money for a DW; also when he proposed we didn’t think we would want to get married ealier).
I’m about to prepare the invitation, so if we want to change now the deadline will be this month. I’m sure if we have Destination Wedding we wont regret later on, however, part of us want to elope; that will be much more special; and the main thing is we can get hitch earlier, and then come back with a small dinner with everyone.
Would you be upset if receiving Save-The-Date Cards and the B&G change their mind?
Note: Intended wedding date is July 2014; now want to elope in June-Aug 2013 (a year before the intended wedding date; so noone has booked anything yet); STD sent out in October 2012.
Post # 3
Member
3885 posts
Honey bee
If I bought an airplane ticket based on your STD or booked time off at work, I’d be really upset.
Post # 4
Member
506 posts
Busy bee
@ fishbone : we sent STD by email out about 20 months in advance (as soon as we decided on the wedding planner); it’s still 18 months out so nobody has book the tickets yet, and if we get hitch privately, that will still be 12 months out, and I’m sure nodoby will book the tickets yet because I dont think you can book that early.
Post # 5
Member
945 posts
Busy bee
I would say yes, I’d be upset if I had already purchased my plane tickets and made hotel reservations.
The thing is you can’t book plane tickets more than 9 months out, at least in my experience anyway.
So no, I wouldn’t be upset if the B&G changed their minds. 🙂
Post # 6
Member
506 posts
Busy bee
@ miss.wiggums: thanks; I always thought you can book up to 1 year; we need to think hard, the most important thing is I’m not sure if anyone will be dissapointed cause they are not invited to a Destination Wedding anymore (and those 40 people we invited are important to us – however the 6 people are the closest)?
Post # 7
Member
3769 posts
Honey bee
- Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo
I would be upset to miss out on the chance to celebrate with you if you were really close to me, but I’d get over it.
Post # 8
Member
332 posts
Helper bee
Normally I would say yes, but you sent your Save-The-Date Cards out so far in advance that people have not started planning and so it wouldn’t be a big deal. However, some people might be offended that they were not able to go to your elopment while others (those 6 people) could go. If you were just getting eloped with the 2 of you, people would understand it’s a financial thing, but by allowing 6 or so people only, the others might take it personally. Don’t know how you’d explain that one unless you invited everyone with the premise that there will not be a big wedding with decorations, chairs, free food, etc.
Post # 9
Member
506 posts
Busy bee
@ elysion: that’s what I think too.
@ texasrandi: It’s so hard, I really wish my mom and dad will be there (and they said they will come, and have planned to go somewhere else afterward, so it likes their second honeymoon; and FI’s best friends as well) – I feel like I’m stealing from them a holiday and sharing special moment with us if we only elope for just the 2 of us.
Post # 10
Hostess
1427 posts
Bumble bee
Most airlines don’t open up booking that far ahead. if you decide to cancel the wedding and elope, I’d recommend you tell your guests ASAP.
Post # 11
Member
7387 posts
Busy Beekeeper
Nope, just tell your guests ASAP. And let them know you plan on having an at home celebration. Its too far out of anyone to be up in arms over it.
Post # 12
Member
88 posts
Worker bee
I think you should be fine! I would never be upset or mad if a friend or family member decided to change their mind as long as their happy I’m happy!
