(Closed) e-ring comment – rant

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@gymbunny04:  this woman is just jealous. plain and simple. don’t take it to heart. you will have a lot of comments like these coming! get used to it!

Post # 4
498 posts
Helper bee

Don’t buy a house just because this lady is competitive.  I would stay put until I could have together enough money (just listen to the Dave Ramsey show for a bit).  Everyone has different ideas about money so don’t even worry about her comments because they only relate to how she deals with money. If she were SO financially comfortable, she would feel no need to talk about it so take whatever she says with a grain of salt. Don’t lean too heavily on her stupid.

Post # 5
1293 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

DOnt think too much about this seriosuly.. she was clearly looking for reasons to make herself look good which is her own insecurity and has nothing to do with you!She was clearly feeling threatened by the ring..

Wear that ring proudly!

Post # 6
11747 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@gymbunny04:  I don’t find anything odd about you living in your house, but it’s definitely something people seem to jump to.  DH bought a house long before we met. I moved into it. We live there now and will until we’re ready to purcahse a bigger home in 2-3 years.  People definitely ask me a lot (especially now that I’m pregnant) when/if we’re moving.  We live in a 3 bedroom 2.5 bath townhouse. It’s plenty big for 1 or 2 kids.  I don’t see what the big deal is, but apparently others do.  I just tell them we’ll be moving in a few years.  Not really any of their business anyways.

Post # 7
498 posts
Helper bee

@gymbunny04:  For what it is worth we live in a very small house and I am not trying to move right now because I am paying off my student loans (become debt free before getting a bigger house). I guess I could “technically” afford a bigger/nicer house but then I wouldn’t be able to meet my financial goals. I have gotten comments like I can’t believe you live like that (like what!?! it is a super nice 2 bedroom house in a nice area). I just shrugged. I am not going into debt or struggle just to impress other people or because other people think I shoul dbe in debt.

Post # 8
2625 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

She’s a green eyed monster! Jealous. Just take it as a compliment.

Post # 9
4943 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

This woman places far too much importance on things other people has that she does not. She picked up on random things (like the house thing) that make zero sense, to pick on you to attempt to make you feel inferior. In short she’s what I like to call a sociopath. 

Post # 10
39 posts

She just sounds like she’s trying to divert the attention to her since her and her husband are so “rich” now. Ignore it. The best thing you can do is be completely comfortable and confident in your and your fiance’s lives and not let anything make you second guess it. The harder she tries to make you jealous of her shows how insecure she really is.

Post # 11
104 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I just wanted to chime in and say that I can totally empathize with you.

I used to be friends with a group of my FI’s coworkers’ wives… they were *unbelievably* competitive. Competing on rings, real estate, vacations, gifts, etc. etc. I used to feel like shit every time after the group of us hung out. UGH.

They also talked smack about the ladies who weren’t able to make it that night. It was like a real-life, grown-up version of Mean Girls.

I eventually had to cut them all out of my life. So glad I got rid of that poisonous influence! I’m 100x happier!

Post # 12
6112 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

I wouldn’t jump to jealousy…not sure why everyone always does

But I do think this woman is obviously competitive. You have a bigger ring, so now she needs to get one. You have a nice house, but she wants it to be known that her house is bigger (could be wrong, I’m just assuming since she was focusing on how much money they have) while trying to play it off by asking when y’all are going to buy a bigger/new house. Maybe she’s just always felt insignificant compared to other people around her and she feels she needs to verbally express how much she’s worth. It’s a very annoying trait (I know someone who brags a lot) but just ignore it. Smile and nod your head. Lol

Post # 13
7216 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

@gymbunny04:  I think that woman thinks far too much about what other people spend money on. Don’t worry about it. She’s a little off. 

Post # 14
1634 posts
Bumble bee

To be honest, I would definitely be way more peeved about the house comment than the ring comment, but only in a matter of, “you’ve made your point, I’ve made mine, why am I still defending myself to you?”

Sounds like she’s immature and thinks that now she and her husband are better off that they should be living like they are better off. Good for you for sticking to your guns and having a good head on your shoulders. Just because you’re married doesn’t mean that you need a new house. I’m sure she’s just equating marriage to dollar signs (combining accounts) and doesn’t really understand that more money doesn’t mean you have to buy all new shit.

Congrats on the engagement, the lovely ring, owning your own home, and having a good head on your shoulders 🙂

Post # 15
2600 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@gymbunny04:  She’s immature and silly. She’s all worried about status and who has what and when they got it. It is tasteless in the extreme to talk about, let alone brag about, one’s financial means. When she asks you questions about your ring, house, car, job…this is not idle, polite conversation – she wants to know where she is in comparison to you. If you’re “ahead” like with your ring, she wants you to know she’s going to catch up and “beat” you. If you’re “behind” she will let you know that too. 

Refuse to play along or let her childish notions make you second guess yourself.

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