Post # 1
My bridal shower is June.4 and so far I have received 2 bridal shower gifts sent to my house. The first one I thought was a package I had ordered and realized it was a shower gift from my fiances aunt and cousin once I opened it. The second was from my moms friend, who i’m not sure is coming to the shower. My fiances mom told me this weekend that his aunt and cousin accidently sent that to my house and were planning on giving it to me at the shower! I don’t know what to do with it, bring it to the shower? I already opened and started using it! I’ve been reading online and people are suggesting not to open the gifts until the shower, which I didn’t know! Should I send her a thank you note now, or wait until after the shower? and same for my moms friend who will not be attending?
Post # 2
Give that you’ve already opened and started using it, it’s probably best to send a thank you note now! Say that you didn’t realise what it was and therefore opened it early.
Ditto for your mom’s friend – I would send the note now so that she knows it’s arrived safely.
Post # 3
amethyst27 : Eh. They sent it earlier, and the world didn’t explode when you used it early, did it? I think you’re fine, lol. Just send a note now so it doesn’t get accidentally forgotten at the time of the shower. For the earlier sent gifts, just leave them at home. Mention that you received some gifts sent early, and don’t stress too much about it. Or have someone else in charge of bringing that gift. It’s your shower, you do deserve to relax at it and have fun – without worrying about someone else’s goof in shipping! (Or….can you get a picture of you using it? If this were me I would totally frame a picture of me using it and bring it xD)
Post # 4
You should always promptly thank people for gifts they send you, not wait until the occasion has passed. So if people send you gifts in advance (even by mistake), you should send a thank you card immediately. There’s no need to bring the gift to the shower. Presumably, most people would send a gift in advance because they can’t attend the shower or the item is too bulky to wrap/bring and it’s just easier to send in advance.
As for people suggesting not opening gifts until after the occasion has passed, I don’t think that is sound advice. You’ll likely get wedding presents in advance, too. You should open them immediately and check that the items aren’t damaged because you may need to make an exchange and have a small window of time to do that. People also want to know the item they sent actually made it to you safely and that you are thankful for it. So, open immediately and thank immediately.
However, the common advice is that you don’t USE any gifts until after the wedding because should the wedding not take place, you need to return the gifts received. So you would set them aside and make sure not to use them after you have checked to make sure they are in one piece and thanked people. I think nowadays some will advise it’s ok to use them in advance, so long as you are financially prepared to buy a replacement to give back if the wedding doesn’t take place.
Post # 5
The gift givers may have intentionally sent the gifts early to save you the hassle of transporting them. I like that! Just make a small thank you announcement while you’re opening presents at the shower that you also received the two gifts.
Post # 6
abwcmo : Ditto!
I did that last week at my “work” shower. Some of my staff sent gifts to my home so I sent a thank you card imediately and thanked them publicly at the shower.
Post # 7
Go ahead and send the thank you. They know it shipped to you. You will have so many notes to write following the shower it makes sense to get on top of that.
Post # 8
Since it was sent to your home, you had no way to know if it was meant as an engagement gift, a shower gift in lieu of attendance or an early wedding gift. It’s true that gifts are not supposed to be put to use before the wedding, but the thank you should go out right away.
You can always rewrap and bring the gift to the shower. If that’s not feasible, I’d consider taking a photo to share at the shower.