(Closed) Eleven days until the wedding…and I feel depressed

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
7082 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2009

Oh, I’m so sorry you are feeling this!  I think it is completely normal to feel any of a variety of emotions before the wedding.  I know that I had a full on melt down 3 days before the wedding.  It was ugly, I wasn’t proud of it.  At the time, I thought ‘this feeling is never going to pass’.  But sure enough, a mere day later I felt like a different person.

This too shall pass, and you’ll be getting the opportunity to declare your love to your man in a permanent way.

I would do a silly little dance for you right now if it would make you laugh, especially since you can’t see it anyway! ๐Ÿ˜‰  Can’t you just picture me doing a cooky jig for you right now while making goofy facial expressions?!

Post # 4
Member
424 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I’m sorry you’re feeling that way! It sounds like you’re just a little overwhelmed. I’ve suffered with anxiety and clinical depression since I was about 12 and have had moments during the planning where I’ve hit some lows…but everything passes with time. My husband (we became legal before our October wedding date) has been very supportive and once a week we have a whole day where there is no talk about the wedding or doing of wedding related projects…and we have a nice date to just relax. It’s helped me a ton. I hope this funk will pass soon and you enjoy all the events leading up to your big day! Good luck!

Post # 5
Member
1514 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I’m sorry you’re feeling that way.  I have a little more time (25 days) but I’ve been feeling down too.  Mostly the stress (worry about getting things done, worrying about the money, worrying about non-wedding stuff).  Just focus on the small things, take a walk or a relaxing bubble bath. 

Post # 6
Member
1091 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2018 - Oakland Manor

yes, yes yes yes. I feel really overwhelmed at the moment and Mr.D and I seem to be sniping at each other more than ever.  Everyone says it will pass. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 7
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Oh i’m sorry you’re feeling blue! Maybe you’re just overwhelmed more than anything? I know i get SUPER crabby and blue if I don’t get some “me time” at home (in my own house) after business trips before i have to come back to the office. Shoot, i just got back from out of town yesterday mornng, went to the office and have been in a funk sense!

Make a list of all the good things maybe or dream up a fancy dinner for you and your Fiance and treat yourselves to a date night at home (it’s budget friendly!) and just focus on you two if you can avoid wedding stuff.

Post # 9
Member
512 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I see you splurge and do all three you suggested! No worries girl – we all go through this during wedding planning and beyond! Im sure you are tired & the trip time got you thinking, etc. You’ll both be fine – hey, if you made it through law school you can make it through anything pretty much! LOL!

Post # 10
Member
3332 posts
Sugar bee

I’m so sorry you’re feeling like this.  I know in the days leading up to our wedding, I felt totally stressed and emotional at times.  I think there are so many emotions happening at once, it’s totally natural to feel a little overwhelmed.  I know I had a meltdown about a week before the wedding where my mom and I were screaming at one another over ribbon, yes RIBBON, in Joann’s Fabrics.  It wasn’t pretty and I’m not proud of it, but I think I put a lot of pressure on myself to get things done in a certain way and I was just super stressed. 

I think the best thing to do is to try to find something to take your mind off everything for a little while.  Rent a funny movie, have a glass of wine, read a magazine, whatever makes you happy–something NOT wedding related.  Hang in there!  You’ll make it and it will be fantastic!

Post # 11
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2009

August15Bride, we’re date twins!  And we’re in very similar situations; it’s me who’s out of work but my fiance is working overseas right up until the wedding (!!!) to keep us in house payments.  And, of course, now that we’re getting close, all kinds of crazy things have been going on at the house, and I’ve had to spend all my time on home repair projects instead of wedding stuff!

I was bummed out a few days ago, like you said, just in a funk.  Just take deep breaths and do some “recreational” activities.  Next Saturday is just going to be fun–for both of us!!

Post # 12
Member
715 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2010

Awwww… I am sorry you feel that way. I get severe wedding anxiety though I am also clinically depressed so you are not alone. I am such a commitment phobe that it also manifests in my sub concious. Since getting engaged I dream almost every night that he is cheating on me, or beats me, or will cheat on me, or leave me. And wake up crying pretty regularly. Which is odd because in real life I am not at all worried about those things. It is just one of those. Big decisions and it brings out the worst in people I think. Or in me.

Post # 13
Member
963 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2009 - Bernardo Winery

I’m so sorry you feel this way! I’m getting wedding anxiety! My to-do list is over loaded and I just want to crawl into a ball and wake-up on my wedding day :-/
Someone suggested taking a full day off from wedding planning and thinking – I think I’m going to try that on Saturday ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 14
Member
344 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

Don’t worry you are not alone in feeling down.  I am little under 2 months to go and I try so hard to remember the important thing is we are getting married, but the other stuff is prity much knocking down my door so it is hard to not feel down. I  just pray a lot!!!!  It is just you got to keep reminding yourself what is really important!

Believe me I do understand.  The whole weight thing I have worked out and not even a pound will come off thanks to thyroid cancer and medical problems, and we aren’t even having guests or anything because most of them didn’t care and we couldn’t afford to have the ones that did and on and on.  So see if it hard, but again I have to try and remind myself that I am lucky to have my fiance and he is my best friend and that we are going to finally be married:)

Post # 15
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Good call, FrenchBulldog. We did that the Thursday before our wedding and it was the BEST THING EVER even though i ended up staying up later Friday doing stuff.

I felt SO refreshed Friday. We even stayed in a hotel (about 20 min from our house in our own city, lol), went out to eat, had a martini, and watched tv from the hotel bed! Nobody could reach us, nobody could ask us “oh where are the towels in your house? Do you have all your programs done?” etc and irritate us. Out of sight, out of mind.

Maybe go out for happy hour and sushi tonight? That ALWAYS makes me feel better. In fact I’m going to pilates in an hour to get out of my funk

Post # 16
Member
820 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

You’re definitely not alone! I have 2.5 weeks to go and I go through spells of being really sad and really excited. I’m sort of nostalgic and sad about leaving my single days behind, which is dumb because I haven’t been single in five years! Also, I’m very snippy and short-tempered with my family and my fiance. I had to get a filling today and then do a wedding related errand, and I was so grouchy, I was rude to the woman who was just trying to help me with the framing of our parent’s gift…. I felt like a jerk afterwards, but I’m blaming it on the pre-wedding stress. I just felt like yelling Don’t you people realize I don’t have TIME for small talk?!?! Just get it done!! Haha. My DOC reassured me that everything WILL get done, it always does, and not to worry. Take some bubble baths, and work out.. working out has actually been the only thing that totally takes it all away. But don’t worry, you are NOT alone!! 

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