(Closed) Elope this year…but ceremony and reception next year??

posted 4 years ago in Elopement
Post # 5
130 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@raylight:  That sounds sweet to me 🙂 I’m sure your family/friends will appreciate that you’re honest about it too. I’ve never been to a wedding in those circumstances, but my friend’s brother did something similar. Got legally married before the end of the year to save on taxes and help the wife get healthcare since she was about to finish grad school. Then, they had the wedding celebration the following summer. Also, I’m having an international destination wedding, so I’ll be doing the legal part either before or after. We’ll do rings at the ceremony with our family and friends and consider that day our anniversary as well Smile

Post # 6
295 posts
Helper bee

I’m not a fan of the redo ceremonies. You’re already married and a wife at that point, not a bride. Why not just throw a big celebration a few weeks after your elopement? 

Also, you can get a name change on a passport for free for one year after a marriage- just make sure you keep an extra photo to send in. I didn’t so I’m going to have to pay a few more bucks to get a different picture (thank god, because the other was TERRIBLE).

Post # 7
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

If you want to elope, then elope.

However, I think I’d be a bit miffed as a guest if you said “it was just more convenient and saved me a few hundred to do it earlier.” Instead I would tell them you wanted to elope. 

Post # 8
3686 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

If your plan all along was to have a very low-key wedding, is there a reason you can’t do everything this year?

Post # 9
1473 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

My best friend did something similar, but for a different reason. She got married in the courthouse in Kenya to her Kenyan husband. They had the big wedding a year later, also in Kenya, that way those of us who went to the wedding had approximately 2 years to save up to travel there. Personally, I didn’t find it odd at all knowing that they had been married for a year but that we were still having a wedding. 

Post # 10
1198 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015 - Malibou Lake Mountain Club

interesting. ive been thinking the same thing! Wonder what the bees will say

Post # 11
178 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

We got married in a private ceremony at the courthouse, and later on threw one party for our immediate family and another one for our friends. Neither of the parties felt like a wedding for us, the magic had already happened. We didn’t have any sort of fake ceremony. It was the way we wanted it, and I wouldn’t change a thing.

However, I’ve been a guest to a party after a private ceremony, and then it didn’t take anything away from it. I think I was just as happy and excited for the couple as I would have been on their actual wedding day.

Could you just move your wedding date to this year?

Post # 12
8695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

 I don’t know anyone has done this and the reason seems a bit weird unless the money for passport and license renewal is that big of a deal. 

Post # 13
6124 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

@raylight:  I cannot tell but is the motivation to just be able to travel in a newly married name for the out of country trip?  Or to save a couple hunderd dollars?



I do know of a few couples who had a big celebration party 1-2 years after the wedding date.  There were no vows exchanged though.

I do know one couple who eloped to Bora Bora secretly (they were trying to avoid big Asian wedding pressure by their families), only to find out it was NOT actually legally recognized here in the US!  The families ended up finding out and making them to put on a full wedding excctly one year later.  We did not go to that even though we got a lovely invitation.  We already gave them a wedding gift for the Bora Bora wedding when they returned and took them out to dinner when they returned.  We did not go to the year later wedding (even though that was the legal one).  They felt Bora Bora was their true anniversary date.


Post # 14
6256 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2014

If you had a reception or vow renewal later, that’s one thing, but having an actual wedding ceremony afterward and using the marriage wording just seems like trying to have your cake and eat it too. You either get married when you elope, or you get married at your wedding ceremony. Not both.

If you want to have a wedding, why not just have the wedding you can afford now? I promise, unless someone is having to travel many hours or you don’t make it clear there won’t be a meal, NO ONE is going to mind if you just do cake and punch in a park pavilion/the VFW. In fact, despite what the bridal magazines try to say, that’s still very much the norm in some places. And it doesn’t really take any time at all to plan.

If you don’t want to have a wedding now, just elope then have a reception, rather than acting like you haven’t already been married awhile.

Post # 15
5662 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I wouldn’t personally elope just to save myself some money on renewing my passport but I say to each their own. I don’t have a problem with people having a ceremony and reception later, as long as people know you already got married. It’s not a wedding now, more of a celebration and renewal.

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