Post # 1
My Fiance and I got engaged in August and it is very exciting for both of us. When he talks with me or about me, he always refers to me as his Fiancee. It’s so cute.
Before getting engaged, we had always agreed that we both want a small wedding as we don’t want to spend alot and we both don’t like attention on ourselves. We both love the idea of getting married in Banff with the mountains in the background. I’m a bit stuck with what to do about guests/no guests. I have 3 brothers who all have spouses and kids but I am not close with any of them. In other words, if we weren’t related, we’d probably not have anything to do with each other. My Fiance has 1 sister with kids. He says the same thing, if they weren’t related, they probably wouldn’t have anything to do with each other.
We have discussed the stressfulness of planning a wedding and trying to decide who to invite/not to invite. My Fiance says it doesn’t matter to him as long as we are together and I’m happy, we wants to do whatever will make me happy.
I love the idea of eloping just the 2 of us because I feel like we are the most ourselves when we are together without anyone else around. He has also been vocal about this.
My parents have already vocalized that they are supportive with whatever we choose to do. We haven’t told his parents we are thinking of eloping but I do feel that they will be really upset.
I had a conversation with my Fiance’s sister and she told me that she thinks eloping is a great idea and that it doesn’t matter what her parents think because it’s our day. We plan to pay for everything ourselves, we will not be asking our parents for money.
I’d like to hear your elopement experiences. Did you have guests? Was it just the 2 of you?
Post # 2
I take a hard line on the definition of elopement. If you’re eloping, there are no guests (other than if witnesses are required.)
And I wish we had eloped.
Post # 3
We eloped (2nd marriage for both) in Colorado where you can self-solemnize (no officiant or witnesses needed). It was great! I think in your situation, it sounds lovely to just have a special ceremony without guests. I’m sure his parents would come around eventually.
Post # 4
kat900 : Elope! I am married to my HS sweetheart and our families have been so involved in our lives for so long that once we finally did marry (10 years later), we felt it was important to make it a celebration and including them, but both parents also helped pay for the wedding and expressed wanting to be invovled. Thinking back now (5 years into our marriage), I would have LOVED to elope and then do a small celebration with just our immediate family. Keeping it small and initmate is must less stressful in my opinion, and like I said, you can always do a get together with family after if you feel the need.
Post # 5
- Wedding: August 2019 - City, State
I feel the same way as misslucy :. You elope, you do it solo. I ALSO wish we had done just that. Our wedding was beautiful, but we spent a large majority of the time alone together anyways so we put on a $20k show for everyone else lol.
Post # 7
We “eloped” but brought guests as witnesses. Wished we left them at home, as my brother in law and husbands friend were utterly useless at planning and logisitics, and would have literally ended up stuck on the side of the road if we hadn’t paused in the middle of our “wedding day” to solve that, following a string of their poor planning on how/when they would even get there etc.
Elope with your hubby, leave everyone else at home.
Post # 8
- Wedding: March 2017 - Nepal
kat900 : We eloped in the mountains and have no regrets!
Banff would be absolutely beautiful. There is a bee who eloped there and the photos were just stunning.
Post # 9
- Wedding: October 2019 - Chateau Lake Louise
kat900 : I just got married in Banff!
We did a micro-destination wedding. We had 21 guests join us. Everyone came up a few days early so we got to spend a couple of days doing fun touristy stuff together.
We had a great time, BUT it was a lot of work coordinating that many people. It was also quite expensive once we added everything up. Also, I quite enjoy being the center of attention, so that was a feature in my case, not a bug.
I wouldn’t have done anything differently, but if you would prefer an intimate experience where you can focus just on each other, that’s what you should do.
It’s the most magical place in the world to get married, so whatever you do, it will be amazing!
Post # 10
- Wedding: August 2018 - Location
We eloped just the two of us and would do it again! No regrets!!!
Post # 11
- Wedding: March 2021 - Kauai, HI
We’re eloping to Kauai just us! I can’t wait.
Post # 12
We are eloping for the vows and the signing of the documents part, then having a party with family a few months later. We knew right away that this was going to suit us. Any family member that has a problem with not watching us “seal the deal” can take a long walk 🙂 . I think they’d be pretty bored, anyway, we’re literally just going to the courthouse and then going out to dinner.
Post # 13
I love the idea of it just being the two of you. Very romantic and special. You can always have a small celebration with your family/his family when you get back!
Also, Banff would be BEAUTIFUL!!
Post # 14
p.s. The Fairmont Banff Springs looks magical!😍
Post # 15
kat900 : It sounds like eloping would be perfect for you.
In my experience, if you are going to elope, do it “properly’ with no guests, or the bare minimum witness requirements. Once a single person is invited, it turns into so-and-so has to be invited because that person is invited, then it ends up being 10 people, then someone wants to bring their new girlfriend etc etc.
Post # 16
We had an enlopement ceremony. We had 2 guests–just the photographer, his officiant, his assistant, and a witness who worked at where we were married. It was perfect for us. I was tempted to open up the wedding to one friend but my husband was saying that if we open it to other people, where does it stop?