(Closed) Elopement or Intimate Wedding?

posted 9 years ago in Elopement
  • poll: Should I elope or have an intimate wedding?

    Elope!

    Intimate wedding!

  • Post # 17
    Member
    10 posts
    Newbee

    I say elope

    Post # 18
    Member
    779 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    @plainjane115:  only you know if you’ll have regrets. Do you really have a desire to have those experiences? Or do you just feel like you should have them because that what every bride is supposed to want? 

    I had an intimate ceremony with 7 guests and I loved it. It was perfect. However I would’ve loved to elope and it just be the two of us. We thought about it but he has kids and we really wanted to include them so we had a small ceremony. 

    Post # 20
    Member
    779 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    @plainjane115:  with that said. I’d elope. Pick a place you love or always wanted to visit. Find a park/beach/venue, photog and officiant and book it. 

    Post # 21
    Member
    4090 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @plainjane115:  This is hard to say.  I had less than excited family members.  In fact, I think they all secretly wanted us to elope so they could et out of buying airline tickets and taking a weekend to travel.  One sister even said to me, “Do you even NEED people there to witness your vows or not?”  It was so crushing the way her tone came across.

    We ended up eloping because my immediate family told me up front (before I even had a month picked out!) that they – each of them, not as a whole – could not fly out (no money, no vacation days, too scared of flying, etc).  An elopement by default if you will!

    So yeah, I can understand not wanting to spend money on poo-pooers like that!

    Post # 23
    Member
    4090 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    @plainjane115:  If they are going to be negative/whiny/etc with either option, then I say make sure you both do what it is you really want.  Sounds lke you’re not making them happy to look deep inside to see what is it you want but realize the limitations.

    Post # 27
    Member
    485 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    We are in very similar situations…VERY similar.  I guess our difference is that the Fiance and I are fortunate enough to have quite a bit of family support but it still doesn’t make our decision any easier.

    Deep down I know we want to elope.  I feel like you should do the same given your circumstances.  Good luck.  I think a nice family thing to follow is a great idea!

    Post # 28
    Member
    560 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    Speaking as someone who regrets eloping, if you are concerned about a family rift and missing certain elements of a family wedding, please do not elope.

    I know that getting married on a weekday is much cheaper, however it is rather inconvenient for your guests. My cousin got married six days before Christmas and only gave two weeks notice. It was on a Sunday and the bride was two hours late. Dinner was also tardy and a lot of guests (including my husband and I) left the wedding because we felt like the couple was inconsiderate. Who on earth marries six days before Christmas with barely any notice on a Sunday when people have to work the next day? Couples who are cheap and don’t care about their guests.

    Apparently my cousin got a great deal so he took it . Undecided There were so many annoyed whispers that day.

     

     

    Post # 30
    Member
    14 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    @plainjane115

    I think your brave, and right on the money! Also, THANK YOU for starting this posts. I was afaird that half of my family would be pissed off that Im getting married, and the other half would be happy, but probably not attend. So ( just now!) we have decieded to just take our children (previous marraiges) on a vacation to Barbados and have a small ceremony with just the seven of us. Congrats & Good luck! 😉

    Post # 31
    Member
    13781 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    Why not do an intimate Sunday brunch?  

    The lack of excitement on both sides does make me wonder if there is some disapproval on the parental front.  Even if that is true, I would still give the families a chance to rise to the occasion once it’s clear that this is a done deal. Marriage is not only  about you and your Fiance, but the joining of your families.  If there is any chance that you will regret eloping, I would reconsider.  

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