(Closed) Eloping before a formal wedding

posted 5 years ago in Elopement
Post # 3
Member
13 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@mylittleviolett:  If it’s going to help you and your Fiance feel more comfortable on your big day, I say go for it. As for telling others, you have to follow your gut. I would probably say keep it a secret until after the wedding though. When my husband and I eloped we had a three month waiting period before we told anyone. It was fun to have a little secret to share.

To be honest, my biggest fear on our elopement day was that we would end up having a crowd of random hikers who stopped by to watch. I thought marriage was such an intimate moment that I didn’t want anyone else there. But, when it finally came time to exchange vows, there could have been a thousand people there and I wouldn’t have noticed another soul. My eyes were locked on my husband’s and he’s all that mattered.

Post # 4
Member
1583 posts
Bumble bee

@mylittleviolett:  I think its considered a private ceremony, not an elopement if you have a wedding still. My friend just did that. if you want to go for it. I would tell your parents at least though. It would kill my mom not to see my actual i do’s.

Post # 5
Member
6124 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I have good friends who married before the big day.  This was about 15 years ago, they are 40 now.  Her mother was taking over everything and nothing was how they wanted.  They ended up eloping at the courthouse, grabbed some wildflowers from the ditch, they were both in their jeans. 

I have to say it created a huge shit storm for her family.  They hated the husband for putting this idea in her head and the ILs relationship has been sour for 15 years.  He over heard the Father-In-Law say some rude things about him at the formal wedding, so there’s grudges on either side!

That’s kind of dramatic if you ask me, but the only story I know of related to what you want to do.

What would be the goal?  To reclaim something that is yours?  Would repeating your vows to each other while on your honeymoon give the same effect?  Could you repeat your vows at the reservation on your anniversary every year?  Just trying to think of ways that would work with what you already have.

Who is the person you have hired to marry you for May 19th?  You could pose some logistical issues here if you are legally married.  Then the officiant would have to do a symbolic ceremony and that depends on the officiant.  So no license signing on the day of the formal wedding.  Just trying to consider the logistics involved.

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